Well, my dilema is that i like my next door neighbor, he doesn't know it yet and he is really good friends with my brother. If i try to go with him my brother will tell on me and make my life a living hell.. I also don't really know how to tell him that i like him, and i just wanted to know how i should go about telling him that i like him. He is 10 years older than i am, I am 18. I also don't want my brother to find out that i like him, so what do you guys think i should do?
2006-11-17 05:07:50 · 19 answers · asked by aaliyahevanescence 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
the thing is we both like eachother, and my mom is the only one who actually has a problem with it. My brother is the one who got me started hanging out with him in the first place, but i don't want to date my brothers friends.. but with him, i have known him already for many many years, we used to hang out all of the time till i moved.. Do you think honestly that dating older ppl is a problem? me i see nothing wrong with it only because by the time that i was 13 i was raising 3 children.
2006-11-17 05:21:44 · update #1
Normal? What's normal? How about, "It happens." How's that for an answer to the question in your subject? As for the question in the body of your message itself:
Well I guess it depends a lot on whether he is "really good friends" with you as well or if he just thinks of you as his friend's little sister the pest.
If you and he are actually pretty good friends then the next time you are alone with him just tell him that he's lucky he's such a good friend of your brother's - because if he WASN'T you would be asking him out (be following him around like a puppy/haunting his dreams as badly as he does yours/proposing to him/stalking him/inviting him to dinner & breakfast on the same date/whatever your thing is...).
At worst, if he just thinks of you as only a friend, he will take the compliment. And if he has been thinking of you in the same way that you have been thinking of him, you've just left him an opening to let you know that - without embarrassing or humiliating yourself. Plus, it puts the ball in HIS court for the next move.
Regardless, if you find yourself in a relationship with him and you start thinking you would like to do something but he wouldn't like to do it b/c of his age (not just b/c it's not his thing, dig?) then it isn't a relationship that you should be in.
Lastly, about anything that you have to "sneak around" to do (not just dating): Well, you will find that it isn't worth doing in the first place! Keeping things under wraps while you are finding out if he wants to pursue a relationship is one thing, but you will need to bring things into the open directly after. Whatever happens, you will of course handle it like an adult... If not, then you shouldn't be dating anyone who is 28 (or 21 either).
2006-11-17 05:26:53 · answer #1 · answered by Wes G 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, if he's 28 and you're 18, I'd find another guy to be interested in. A 10 year age gap is nothing when you're talking about 30's and 40's, but it's HUGE at that age. I would doubt very much it would be a good experience for you to "go with" this guy.
2006-11-17 05:12:22 · answer #2 · answered by JennyJen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For some reason I don't get the feeling that you are 18. I mean most 18 years olds have dropped the "go with" thing and started referring to it as dating. I think you are younger than you say you are. So I would say leave the man alone and don't get him locked up in jail
2006-11-17 05:18:38 · answer #3 · answered by outta my mind 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
hey its normal that u like a guy 10yrs older than u. And i can understand why u don't want ur brother to know. But are u really ready for the hide and seek game you will find urself in if u should confess ur love? Sweet! i hope its a crush that will fade soon. that game isn't healthy for you.
2006-11-17 05:17:10 · answer #4 · answered by fafayo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should assess the situation better and see if you really want to go with someone who is 10 years elder to you. The age difference is almost a whole generation apart.
2006-11-17 05:10:45 · answer #5 · answered by l_kur 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find someone your own age - 10 years is a lot at 18
2006-11-17 05:09:55 · answer #6 · answered by ksmpmjoll 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ur 18 who cares what ur brother says...ur not always going to live at home. take this as an adult and just tell him, talk to him. even better yet talk to ur mom or dad if u r infact living with them. my sisters are 10 and 9 yrs older than me so i grew up with a lot of older guys. i know how u feel. sit down and have a convo with them. they will see that u r infact an adult know and can make ur our choices. as for him tell him straight up or ask him to hang out. nothing bad can come for it. maybe he will hang out with u. maybe he will like u, but u'll only know if u try.
2006-11-17 05:11:24 · answer #7 · answered by ..::..Lovin him..::.. 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
He's too old for you. You should be concentrating on college instead of trying to pursue and older man who has expressed no interest in you. If it wasn't going to be a problem, you wouldn't be trying to keep it a secret. Sorry.
2006-11-17 05:11:42 · answer #8 · answered by justcurious 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do this when you brother is not around. Go over to our neighbor's looking for your brother. SInce he won't be there you'll have a chance to talk to your neighbor.
2006-11-17 05:14:14 · answer #9 · answered by FF Geek 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hunny im 21 and thats close to the age you should be looking for not some one damn near mid life dudes almost 30 hun
2006-11-17 05:10:57 · answer #10 · answered by Lab Runner 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋