Why do men play games with a woman's emotions?

Question

I had a boyfriend treat me like crap. He was very mentally controlling and mentally abusive, and after we broke up, he continued to talk to me, knowing how I felt about him, torturing me. When we broke up, he said "if it wasnt you, it would have been someone else" Why do men lie to get what they want? How could he be so cold, yet after the fact, talk to me like nothing ever happened? Why do men play women? I am a very nice, smart, attractive woman and I completed college. He had a degree, but in a dead-end job and he wasnt very attractive. Why did he have someone like me, yet use me just for what he wanted, not caring about me?

He did not like spending time with me, only maybe a day a week, and towards the end, it turned into once every two weeks or so. He lives a few minutes from his parents house, because he thought 20 minutes was too far away from them. We arent young people, we are in our twenties. He has a job that doesnt require his degree, and he has no desire to change that. I no longer speak to him. He made up excuses and reasons beyond my belief as to why we couldnt be together anymore.

Answer 1

First of all not all men play these kind of manipulative games that you're talking about. These are hurtful and disrexpectful. They are a sign of a very weak and immature man, that you should just put out of your life. Secondly, the men that do these games do them because the women in some ways let them. Don't let him hurt you anymore. Be done with him! Erase his number, don't email/write and move on with your life. You will find a good man, but you have to start looking!

Answer 2

People treat you the way you want to be treated and get away with what you let them get away with, especially early in the relationship. When you first meet a guy you have to let him know where you stand and none of this let things happen crap. If you do that, things will happen right underneathe your nose and by the time you discover what has happened, it is too late! You found yourself a dead-beat!

Any man that goes for a women he can manipulate probrably has a self esteem problem.

Women, when choosing a man; choose the male role model you respect the most...Now find someone equal to him or better. Chances are anything less then that will be a disappointment.

Answer 3

The ones that do know how to play the manipulative game do it well because that's what they like to do. They know how to find the most vulnerable victims (which as usually the sweetest loving people) and know how to use there pathetic skill to get what they want when ever they want it by playing there a ruthless game.. We need to remember "actions speak louder than words and if your gut is trying to tell you something or just doesn't feel right then run the other way fast before your emotions are messed up. I know how you feel i too have been caught up in this game a couple of times. I have learned a lot from them.

Answer 4

Some men feed off of the thrill of having a woman want them so badly that she will put up with whatever he dishes out just have his company. It sounds like that was the case with you and this jerk, There could have also been a self esteem deficit on your part. Sometimes women feel that they are worthy or deserve better.

You are well rid of him. You don't need him or anyone like him. You deserve better. Take your time and choose wisely the next time around. Don't settle for anything less than the best. It's not worth it

Answer 5

Not all men are like that and he is in the minority. He was a jerk. The problem is that you were attracted to someone like that. You should get counseling to help you build your self esteem You already know you are better than tha.t Now feel it. There are good men out there who will treat you right but if you are attracted to the bad boys and a lot of women are despite what they say you will end up repeating your mistakes.

Answer 6

There are both men and women that do this. You need to look more at yourself to determine why you chose him and allowed yourself to be abused and manipulated. That does mean he is guiltless; he was probably an a**hole. But, that does not relieve you of the responsibility of figuring out why you let that happen. Likely you need to boost your self esteeem, you said you were in a dead-end job. Once you are happy with yourself, then you can find someone you can be happy with.

Answer 7

Not all men are properly prepared to accept the responsibility of having a woman at their side. I am sorry to say this but they are lacking in maturity and some of them are very insecure. And the time it will take for them to grow up your hair may have turned gray by that time. I said this before and I will say this again woman are just going to have to revamp their way of thinking on how to choose their boyfriends. And I must say this that so many women choose their current boyfriends for all the wrong reasons........................ And they still blame the man for their poor choices................

Answer 8

The question is: You are smart, educated, attractive and nice. While he is/was in a dead end job w/ a degree that is not being put to use and UGLY. What the hell were you doing w/ him ?!

Answer 9

Thats how some guys are but not all. Next time he tries to talk to you walk away. Also why did you stay with him the first and second time he treated you like that you should have known.

Answer 10

Because he is crap. Future advice is not to give of yourself so easily. This way someone will have to wait and work at building a relationship. And during that time you can determine their character.