This girl I know calls me "best friend" but she is very far from it. I lost my 3rd baby in March. His name is Deven. If I say"After I had the baby" or "Deven this or that". She'll say"Who's Deven"? Wouldnt a "best friend" know her best friends lost baby? She knows Im a vegetarian. I was invited she her kids party 1 1/2 hours away. I asked ahead and she said "yes,there will be food". I get there and she asks me to put the dogs on the grill and says" sorry we dont have anything vegetarian". Not even potatoe,salad,slaw,beans,nothing! Even meat lovers have potatoe salad with their bbq. I was very irked! After all this I cant stand this chick! Plus,she's highly self absorbed. She's flashy but her daughter(3) looks like a stripper. Tiny dresses with no shorts. You can see her WHOLE butt when she leans forward. UGH!
2006-11-17 04:12:34 · 14 answers · asked by TrofyWife 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
First of all.....my sympathies for the loss of your babies.
I have been in this situation...friend-wise....and can only tell you of this experience. This person told everyone I was her "best friend" but would only call me or come to see me if she had nothing else to do. She didn't have time to talk when I called her if something that sounded more fun came up. Basically, she used me until I became fed up with it. I finally told her I couldn't be her "fair weather" friend anymore, it wasn't worth the effort since I had nothing glamorous to offer her.
The short of it is...no matter how you handle it, this type of person won't get it. They're never at fault, never wrong and consider themselves to be the best thing walking upright! Avoid her and always be busy when she decides to call or come around. You're worth more than what she has to offer!!
2006-11-17 07:40:18 · answer #1 · answered by Rembrandt11 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you can tell how you felt about driving an hour and a half to her birthday party and having nothing to eat since you're vegetarian. Talk to her about her lack of respect and oblivious sence of friendship. Explain that you don't think that friends treat others like that and feel that you don't have the need or desire to put up with the disrespect she gives you when you talk about your unborn child. If she acts blameless and tries to preject unto you, tell her you're not interested in being her friend anymore and that maybe some day you will be able to both see your sides of the story:)
Good luck
2006-11-17 12:21:58 · answer #2 · answered by bettybobetty 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like neither on of you is much of a friend to the other. She should not have asked a vegetarian to cook hot dogs, and perhaps your critisizing of her has reached her ears, or your attitude has.
You need to drop each other.
A lot of people refer to whatever friend they are talking to at the time as their best friend. I do not agree with that, but that is my opinion.
If you both want, you can be the Christmas card kind of friends, but it does not sound like either one of you would want to.
Everyone deals with the loss of a child in their own way. A friend includes her son's name on every Christmas card, with a heart by his name. He would be in his 20's now, he passed away at age 7. We had talked about it, if it had happened to me, I probably would not do that, but it is fine for her. Our personalities are very different.
Sorry about your problems.
2006-11-17 18:43:39 · answer #3 · answered by riversconfluence 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you feel this way i say tell her! get it off your chest and then forget her.. if she is your bestfriend she would always know who deven is.. also as for the party that was wrong to invite you and not have anything for you.. it seems like she doesnt try to be friends or put in any effort.. you are better off without her.
2006-11-17 12:18:06 · answer #4 · answered by gacountrygirly 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have a similar "friend", I just stopped answering her calls. I think she's got the message (probably not the best way to deal with it, but I really couldn't think of a nice way to say I do not like you, I think your self-absorbed and offensive)
2006-11-17 12:17:03 · answer #5 · answered by CHRYSTAL I 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, what you have to do is stop returning her calls and coming up with excuses when she asks you to go out. Apparently, she is someone who likes to have people follow her and she doesn't care about the people that follow her. Let it go it's not even worth stressing about it. I'm sure you have other good friends.
2006-11-17 12:18:33 · answer #6 · answered by JeWel in the MakE! 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well obviously this chick is very low on the best friend thing. Tell her flat out that you don't like her attitude and if she was really your friend, then she would know what you like and all that.
2006-11-17 12:17:08 · answer #7 · answered by mycatjello@yahoo.ca 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unless you need to associate with this person for business reasons, I'd distance myself from her completely. It doesn't sound like a productive relationship for you in any way shape or form.
2006-11-17 12:47:21 · answer #8 · answered by GEEGEE 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
She definitely is not a close friend and I would just be honest. Stay away and keep the distance that you want.
I empathize with the lose of your baby.
2006-11-17 12:16:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure what your question is, but this girl is obviously not a friend. Sadly, I ahve the same sort in my life and I'm just not sure how to shake her!
2006-11-17 15:06:12 · answer #10 · answered by Goose&Tonic 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋