2006-11-17 00:31:37 · 17 answers · asked by Graça 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Probably won't be with her too much longer.
2006-11-17 00:37:40 · answer #1 · answered by DJ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My first thought is always WOW how can you not want children? But you know what? There are those that just recognize the fact that they would not be a good parent. I have a friend, who is in her late thirties, maybe early forties, she's been married and divorced and never in her life has she ever had a desire to have children. I always thought, wow that's nuts and she'd tell me "I wouldn't be a good mother", and I never believed it til one day my kids were screaming and she said "man if those were my kids they'd be locked in the basement, how do you handle that? I could never deal with that" !! LOL And knowing her, she probably WOULD lock them in the basement!!!
But I don't think that she is selfish at all, a majority of her friends have children, she has nieces and nephews, buys them things and always sends my kids birthday and christmas cards. She once, because my daughter used to love puzzles and stickers so much, took a blank puzzle set (one of those make your own puzzle things) and decorated with stickers and drew all over it and gave it to my daughter. She loved it.
Honestly I think when someone says they don't want kids, they are not at all being selfish, I think they just realize that they might not make a good parent, and I think that by admiting that they don't want kids that they are being far more mature than most people realize, I think they are actually giving.
Look at it this way, if a person who says they don't want kids then ends up having them just to put them up for adoption... is that really better? I don't think so.
2006-11-17 08:50:27 · answer #2 · answered by p 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's smart to make that decision and not be afraid to say it outloud. Not all people are cut out to be parents. If more people would stop to think about the responsibilities that come with a child maybe there wouldn't be so many kids in foster care or so many abortions. I never had kids and neither did my wife. I knew that I didn't have the temperament or the patience for kids. I love my nieces and nephews and enjoy spending time with them but they go home at the end of the day. I don't think people should be put down or looked down upon for making a wise decision for themselves.
2006-11-17 08:56:44 · answer #3 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If the person is a teenager, I think that is normal. But if it's an adult over the age of 25, I think that phrase sounds somewhat self-serving, selfish, cold, bitter and angry.
I have never met someone who said they didn't want to have kids who didn't posses at least 4of the above mentioned traits.
Sometimes they say something like, "With this world the way it is, I would never bring a baby into this mess."
No offense to people without kids but the ones I encounter are less tolerant of the ups and downs of life, they aren't flexible, they are easily annoyed and somewhat full of themselves and their own "entitlements."
And I am not one of those people who thinks children belong EVERYWHERE...I think a decent restaurant is not a good place for a screaming toddler or that certain shops or stores are not good places for kids.
I have a child but I don't believe that entitles me to subject everyone around me to the child.
****I do agree with the reply who said "thank goodness" that some people don't have kids. Some people just aren't cut out for parenthood and praise be to those who are wise enough to know that they wouldn't do a good job!
2006-11-17 08:41:20 · answer #4 · answered by ssssss 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think about my best friend who said that. She said she is too selfish to ever have kids and I am very happy she hasn't. She is now 36 and is still too selfish to have kids. Thank God that some people are still honest with themselves.
2006-11-17 08:40:07 · answer #5 · answered by Jon O 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That they'll change their mind when the get older!!!! or meet the right person, I mean I said it fair enough that I was young, but I really didnt think I would ever want kids.
I am now almost 4 month gone and loving it
2006-11-17 08:38:53 · answer #6 · answered by carrienicholson23 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is selfish, bu honest. If they don't want them, then I hope they don't have them.
But, being a mom, and now a grandma, I know it is the greatest feeling in life. It's what brings joy and purpose into your life.
I can't imagine growing older, and not having family around.
2006-11-17 08:40:23 · answer #7 · answered by Momma Jo 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Marry me. It seems selfish but my man and I, if we ever have kids might raise a Charlie Manson...or a Clay Aiken since were both weird. kidding. Nah, we might not be good parents, we both have screwy childhoods.
2006-11-17 08:44:43 · answer #8 · answered by stormsandblues 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would respect his belief but I know I wouldn't want to be with someone who does not share my desire to have my own kids and raise a family.
2006-11-17 10:06:44 · answer #9 · answered by Alias G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would think they have medical reasons or they are not ready. One of my friends use to say it all the time, and she is/was not the "kid type". Now she is expecting twin boys any day now........
2006-11-17 08:40:05 · answer #10 · answered by Lady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats their perogative. i always think that they r going to change their mind. i used to think that they r going to have a lonely existence when they get older. i just think this way because i have always wanted kids. i would of hated never having one.
i know alot of older people who have never had kids, they seem content with their lives.
2006-11-17 08:41:16 · answer #11 · answered by Miki 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋