i am the mother of a gorgeous little boy, i am succesful in my life. idependant etc...so why is it that when a man realises i am a mother too that they are scared off!!!
2006-11-16 22:40:45 · 27 answers · asked by kelley k 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Not all men are scared just the selfish or insecure ones good luck at least when you do find him he will be confident and sharing remember you don't just need any man but 1 who would be there for you both a good role model for your son and a lover and friend for you.
2006-11-16 22:46:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Some are like that, and some are not. The problem can be very complicated. It depends on what is the real reason for the guy to run away when he finds out you have a child.
Some men do not want to share you with the father of the kid. It is a lifetime thing, not temporary. Even if you do not talk to the ex anymore, the new guy does not like the idea of the other guy; and your son will always remind him of that.
Some men want to be special. You can love the new guy more than anyone before, but you always will have your first born by someone else. The new guy may always feel in second place.
Some men learn this behavior from parents.
There are to many reasons to list here, but I hope you get the idea. Also, there are many men that do not have that problem.
I want to add that I know a woman with two (2) kids, and she does not want a man with kids from another woman. Just to show that it can get even weirder.
2006-11-17 06:55:35 · answer #2 · answered by jasonheavilin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not always the case. I have a daughter from a previous marriage and met my boyfriend when she was 5. (2 years ago) He's never been married or had children,so initially I was certain he'd run a mile! But he's brilliant with her-and she loves him!
Some men just fear that you are looking for a new dad for your child,and aren't ready for that kind of responsibility. It seems your just meeting the wrong type of guy at the moment-but don't give up,you'll find a nice guy who will accept you and your gorgeous little boy quite happily into his life in time.
2006-11-17 06:57:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm always in the fear that the child doesn't want things to change and children will do whatever they will to keep things the same between mom and them. The other person is an invader threatening that relationship and attention. I have dated within Parents Without Partners (PWP) and the kids seem ok, till you start seeing their parent. I run most of the time when I see the parent has children between that ages of 7 and 16 and always when that child is female.
2006-11-17 07:11:32 · answer #4 · answered by Rickard 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you know, Lions & Ape Males when first meet females they (males) kill the offsprings from previous males. This makes females come on heat (be ready for mating) faster. This is the nature's way for selection of the best.
I feel this is carried in our genes by somewhat manner in somewhat percentage.
Also a Lady is more devoted to kids as mother than to man as his wife. No man likes to share his wife even with the kids that are not of his own.
These may be the reasons which are followed knowingly or unknowingly.
2006-11-17 06:52:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not all men are put off. My girlfriend has a wonderful daughter from way before me. I tell you what, though - it does make our feeble chat-up attempts ten times more difficult because suddenly we have to impress two people from two completely different age groups who are into very different lifestyles and are monumentally protective of each other.
If you come across a man (sorry, meet a man) who even tries to attempt this, you can bet he's deadly serious about one of you at least, and might be worth giving a go. Just beware the ones who are over-enthusiastic - sadly they are out there too.
Good luck to you. Both of you. Patience.
2006-11-17 07:08:52 · answer #6 · answered by Ask the chicken 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a single mother of a gorgeous little girl - I hope not!!
But I have found that its not my child that puts men off its the fact that I don't have that much free time to spend with anyone else!
When I first meet someone I don't immediately introduce them to my daughter and as her father only has her alternate weekends that doesn't leave much time to get to know someone!!
2006-11-17 08:01:43 · answer #7 · answered by Megan xxx 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they may realize that the child nmay have diffiult tiem accepting them they coudl be seen as a laiblitity that yu arent available to be ther in realtionship just for them whish is selfish mtoivation but nevertheless one that sometiems is therealos they may think there is an extra expense and effort and all they may want is a casual relationship and myabe they want to move ona nd already have their kids form perevious realtionships or jsut area at an age wher they decied hacing kids is a responsiblity that will tie em down.
Having siad that I can thave children with my present wife and if had the opportunity at this point to have a gf with childresn i would take the risk i f i think you are a decent enough gal and think of it as a possible bonus with enough time
2006-11-17 06:50:10 · answer #8 · answered by Bud 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Purely dependant on the type of person. Personally I see single mums as strong people with much to be respected for.
Only the weak-minded or those that want more of a child-like existance would be worried of being with a woman that has children in my opinion.
2006-11-17 06:49:46 · answer #9 · answered by brianthesnailuk2002 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The male chimpanzee kills the offspring of the female's previous partner before impregnating her with his. The chimpanzee is our closest relative so it's not surprising that the idea of raising another mans kids goes against the grain. Also if the kids are quite old they will probably resent the man who moves in.
2006-11-17 06:52:03 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋