my kid saw me wathcing porn is that a big deal??

Question

i told them it was natural

Answer 1

Imagine you were your child's age and saw your father watching porn. Would you feel satisfied with the explanation that it's natural? I think a child would still feel disturbed.

Perhaps explaining that it is "private" rather than natural would be more helpful. Explain that you did not intend for your child to witness your private interest and discuss how porn is NOT natural at all. The people involved are paid to perform.

Don't get too deep into the discussion as your child will probably be trying to scrub his/her mind wishing he/she did not see his father watching porn. Most children don't wish to think of their parents as sexual beings. Being loving and affectionate with your spouse or partner provides a good example, but slipping porn into the picture is a mistake. Perhaps an apology would help, along with a mention of the images he/she saw as being inappropriate.

I agree with Kurt above - kids learn by example. You need to be a positive influence and guide him/her away from this type of pursuit.

Answer 2

First off, why are you referring to your kid as 'them'? Does your child have a gender, or do you have more than one child that saw you? Were you in the act of masturbating or just watching? How old is the child? It is nearly impossible to answer this question insightfully without knowing more about the situation. My first instinct is that a child walking in on a parent masterbating to porno would be shocking and disturbing, especially if the child is under age 14, and ESPECIALLY if you have a daughter. Boys at all ages play with their penises some, so they might have less of a reaction. Someone above said to explain that your actions were 'private', I think that is a good idea. The image of the porno or you in a compromising situation will be burned into their heads, but if you instill in them that you are not embarrassed, but that what you were doing was similar to when you go potty, you do it alone when no one is around or watching you, they may feel more relaxed about it. Don't apologize, for that will make your child think what you were doing was wrong, and that might make them feel nervous about it. Most of all, don't make a big deal of it to them. And another thing, if you're going to jerk it with your kids in the house, better be sure you are in a locked room. You don't want them exposed to your private pleasures ever again. Once is enough to disturb any child.

Answer 3

It really depends on how old your child is and exactly how the situation occurred. It also depends on how you reacted when he/she walked in. Without more information it is really hard to decide if it was a "big deal" or not. My generic advice would be to wait a couple of days and then ask your child if they have any questions about what they might have seen. If they have questions just answer them as honestly as you can, and if they don't want to ask you any questions just assure them that you are available to talk to should they ever want to talk about it. Sex is natural but porn is almost always over the top and exaggerated and could lead to confusion in younger children and curiosity in older children. The most important thing is to keep the lines of communication open.

Answer 4

Yes it is a big deal and no it is not natural. Watching porn is wrong and the best thing to do is come clean about that to your kids. Tell them you were wrong to do it and are going to stop as of now. Then stop.

Answer 5

all depends on their age, what you do is your business but don't be careless about it when there are kids in the house. If they are old enough to understand a bit about it,explain to them that they can ask you about it if they wish. If they are young kids I would wait until you are asked questions by them which will ineveitably happen but there is also a chance it went over their heads.
They will learn about sex whether or not you teach them about it so it is not a big deal but it is certainly not natural for them to see you watching porn, so be more discreet next time.

Answer 6

Could be a hard act to follow. I mean, if he compares what he saw on the screen to the audience, he could underestimate you for the rest of your life. What were you doing? Enjoying a healthy bag of popcorn? The day may come when Jr. requires more info. about this 'natural' act Daddy is now known for. Too bad he didn't catch you watching a ball game, or maybe he did!

Answer 7

Sex is a natural part of life and should be hidden from them. They should learn what sex is from the time they ask questions however, the depth of your answers should depend on both their age and their level of understand/maturity.

They saw you watching porn, so what. As long as you didn't invite them to sit with you and relieve any tension.

Answer 8

I mean its a big deal and it isnt...your going to have to be prepared to tell your child what is going on, when they ask but put it in a kids way....Really you shouldnt just watch porn in an open area!

Answer 9

What, now you better sit down & explain it better or he will be hummping his friends, nothing about porn is natural!!! Why even have the stuff on or in the house w/ kids

Answer 10

It is a big deal,depending on their age and how innocent they are.When you're young sex is taboo and naughty, probably dirty and if they think like that they might start to think that about you.Simular thing happened to me and ive always remembered it,now i look back and can think "oh well" but at the time it was a big shock for me.