had been raped?? Would you work to gain and keep her trust?? Or break it when she fell asleep next to you one night??
2006-11-16 14:42:02 · 4 answers · asked by Michael 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If she was okay/better now would you date her??
2006-11-16 14:48:30 · update #1
If she was okay/better now would you date her??
2006-11-16 14:48:35 · update #2
when she was sad would you hold her in ur arms and let her fall asleep or give up??
2006-11-16 14:52:56 · update #3
Among the women I've dated I count two victims of rape and three victims of child molestation -- and that's what I know about. Working to earn and keep a woman's trust is nothing new to me.
This effort on my part didn't come for free, however. In exchange for earning their trust I expected each of these women to be worthy of _my_ trust. As in, I would be a shoulder to cry on, but not a dumping ground for misplaced aggression. I wouldn't pressure for sex, but neither would I tolerate being cheated on (one of them did cheat on me, with the guy who raped her no less). I wouldn't try to rush the healing process, but I did expect some kind of healing process to occur.
What I mean by saying this is that it can't be all about the woman. Sure, a man who is involved with a woman who has something like that in her past needs to be sensitive to her needs. But he has needs, too, and I'm not talking about sex. If the only way that she thinks she can heal is to hurt him, that's not healing the hurt. That's just spreading the hurt around. Being patient and gentle with a woman who needs patience and gentleness does not require you to allow her to be cruel to you. If you see signs of that, it's time for a serious talk. If the ill treatment continues, it's time to walk. Sometimes a victim has to do a certain amount of healing before she's ready for a relationship.
2006-11-16 15:01:09 · answer #1 · answered by D'archangel 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dated a girl and found out that her father sexually assaulted her about a month into the relationship. It was confusing for me to deal with so I couldn't even imagine how it was for her. But I stayed with her and made the most us being together.
2006-11-16 22:50:58 · answer #2 · answered by mnorth12 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah... I wont mind... I will give more concern and cares towards her too.. To build her confidence back...
2006-11-16 22:50:51 · answer #3 · answered by porridge0000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
May be, but she wouldn't mind because if she sleeps next to me, there should be a sign that she wants it, and she lost her virginity any ways....
2006-11-16 22:49:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋