Need help proving this fake disease by lying with statistics- any medical help would be great!?

Question

OK, this is eventually going to become a school project. I have made up a humorous artificial illness, Milk Disturbance Syndrome, that I would like to make appear as if based upon real or at least potentially real facts. We will be learning in class very shortly how to lie with statistics using wordplay, bias, etc.

SO. I figured that since the cholesterol in milk can block up arteries and stuff, it could 'theoretically' (in this fake illness) block the parts of the brain that release stress-calming hormones, thereby appearing to somewhat support the hypothesis that milk induces and worsens stress and, over time, would deteriorate one's health.

Can anyone help me with medical specifics to at least make it look like I'm supporting my theory with facts? GREATLY APPRECIATED! Anything you can do to help would be wonderful.

Answer 1

Milk & Disturbance sounds way to simple. How about "lactose" for milk, and "imbroglio" or "convolution" for disturbance. In other words Lactose Imbroglio Syndrome, or Lactose Convolution Syndrome.
Perhaps someone can help you with the rest of your question.