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Should stepparents be a prime reinforcer of punishement?

2006-11-16 10:41:28 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Family

20 answers

I am a step mom to my husbands three children and he to my 3 children. We both felt that when we married the other would have that right. We each feel that if done in a proper way that the other should have that right. We went thru the you are not my mom or dad things and that's ok but in the end what ever punishment was handed out was still there. I do so because I want them to turn out to be responsible adults. That's how we learn in life is by the punishments and rules in life are handed down by our parents and weather they are biological parents you will find rules suck but they have to be followed. That's what works for us. I am mainly the one at home most with our last son at home so even though I am his step mom I punish more than his dad. He does not like it sometimes but does abide by what I say. Wish you lots of luck sweety!

2006-11-16 10:49:26 · answer #1 · answered by craftylady 2 · 2 1

When you marry someone, you marry their kids too. If you can't do that, then you shouldn't be getting married to that person.

therefore, stepparents are the parents as well, and just as in ANY house, the parents have to show a united front, and that means the step has the responsibility to discipline.

Look at this way, do the step's funds contribute to the expense of raising the child? Clothing, food, shelter? You can't take all of the good w/o the bad.

2006-11-16 11:04:53 · answer #2 · answered by Manny 6 · 1 1

The stepparent needs to be a team with the biological parent. If the biological parent approves of the type of discipline (I don't like the word 'punishment') that is being used, then there is no reason they shouldn't be doing it. If the biological parent has a problem with it, then maybe not. My stepfather was vary discliplinary, and I have respected and loved him all the more for it. I don't think I would have the same caring relationship with him had he not been a team with my mother. I consider him to be as much my father as my biological father is.

2006-11-16 10:47:37 · answer #3 · answered by toothfairy 3 · 2 1

No, I think the regular parent knows what's best for the kid. Unless, of course she/he became the stepparent when the kid was still a baby or a couple years old

2006-11-16 10:46:15 · answer #4 · answered by ♥ Sydd 4 · 0 1

It takes a village to raise a child and authority is authority. Moving into my village means playing by my rules or emancipate yourself so you can make your own rules.

Parent regardless to how they are put together are a team and kids need to respect that. Stepparents need to fair and firm just like a natural parent.

2006-11-16 10:47:09 · answer #5 · answered by BionicNahlege 5 · 2 1

Technically, the respond will variety observing the state you reside in and the situation. confident, while it includes baby help. If companion is remarried yet loses activity, then money is predicted to return from the working companion even nonetheless they're stepparent. If no longer, then non-custodial parent is going to detention center or fined for non-charge of baby help finally. might desire to stepparents be speaking to colleges if the baby does not stay of their state? No comparable state? probable. comparable city? confident. okay to p.c.. up baby is thought. might desire to stepparents be speaking to docs? No, no longer till they're taking them to the appointment... might desire to stepparents ascertain baby is fed, cared for and enjoyed in the time of visitation? confident might desire to stepparents spank? No, yet your question helped me understand why my son had a bad visitation some years in the past. different discipline approaches? easily confident! might desire to stepparents understand psychology sufficient to refuse to assert something undesirable approximately custodial parent and/or transformations of race, ethicity or faith in front of the baby? confident, that could be an very grownup element to do..... might desire to stepparents ascertain the baby help is paid? confident. might desire to stepparents pass to court on behalf of the baby? No, no longer without the parent companion in contact. Can stepparents undertake the baby? confident, yet provided that the beginning parent facilitates it. i recognize of a few church homes that have stepparents training available yet that's the lacking hollow that could desire to be required. Too in many circumstances, jealously is a sizable subject for stepparents. For me, i recognize to stay on my own extremely than date a guy with youngsters and that i've got youngsters! the subject concerns my first ex created over visitation and issues he advised that weren't genuine to my modern-day husband helped reason my 2nd divorce. the recent husband wasn't arranged for that kind of stuff. I believe the guy under who suggested that the baby became into there till now marriage, so being married a 2nd time won't make the toddlers pass away or duty for the toddlers to end. in case you do no longer prefer to be a parent, do no longer marry somebody with youngsters. hassle-free! there are a number of approaches to abuse a baby without touching them, I wish all of that could stop right here contained in the favourite worldwide. wish this permits you in some way.

2016-10-04 01:21:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Well, not at first. But they should definitely be the secondary one. My son - in - law is going through this same thing having married my daughter who already had 2 kids age 7 and 12. It's hard for my daughter to let him discipline them but my husband and I told her that she has to because they need to know there are 2 parents in the house now and that is his place as step father. Otherwise he won't feel accepted as her equal and the kids won't respect him. Good luck to you.

2006-11-16 10:46:07 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Not in our house. The parent is the enforcer. But the step-parent is the backup. Everything should be done with love, including the punishment.

2006-11-16 10:43:59 · answer #8 · answered by RIDLEY 6 · 2 1

Absolutely not the prime reinforcer. but I do think they are entitled to some form of punishment, esp when bio parent is not around.

2006-11-16 11:56:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 2

Oooo. That is a toughy. I wouldn't because my friends hate it when stepparents do that. Soo, yeah. I wouldnt. They just rebel even more.

2006-11-16 10:45:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 1

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