Raped and he'll get away with it?

Question

I was recently raped, there's no other way of starting this story. I don't want to bother trying to start it off all flowery. The simple fact is, I was raped.
I was at a house party, it was being thrown by a friend of mine. Practically everyone from my year at school was there. The place was packed and everyone was drunk or stoned. I wasn't feeling very well and I went upstairs to go the toilet, I felt like I was going to vomit.
Some guy was waiting for the toilet too and I started talking to him. He's new at school and I wanted to make him feel welcome because I hadn't seen him talk to anyone all night.
When the girl who was in the bathroom came out, the guy let me go in first because I'd said I felt ill. He followed me in and I thought he was just checking I'd be okay.
But the next thing I know he grabs me and shoves me against the wall. The floor was slippy from where everyone had been spilling drinks. I fell and banged my head on the sink.

The guy was scrambling at the zip on my jeans and he had them off before I could even try and stop him.
My head was really hurting, that coupled with me feeling ill made it impossible for me to stop him. I screamed at him to stop but he didn't and the music downstairs was so loud I don't think anyone could have heard me.
He whispered things to me like how sexy I was and how he'd fancied me since he'd first seen me. He didn't seem to comprehend me screaming and pushing him. He just carried on.
I was sobbing by the time he finished but he just stood up and wiped himself. He tugged my jeans up for me and kissed me. Then he said something about my head and wiped my tears away saying he was sorry he'd made me fall. He just didn't acknowledge what he'd just done.
He unlocked the door and led me out, even telling the guy waiting outside I'd banged my head. I didn't go home after that, I was too scared to be alone anywhere.

I pretended everything was ok until a friend of mine was leaving.
As we walked home I told her what had happened and she started crying and hugging me. She said it would be okay and that I had to tell someone official.
I did go to the police to make a statement but they said bluntly I had no chance of winning if it went to court because I'd admitted to being drunk and my memory of the whole assault was hazy. They told me I couldn't make it stand up in court as they could use my bad memory against me and say I'd consented to it.
What do I do? I can't let him get away with it but the police have already told me I've got no chance! I'm distraught about what's happened and so angry that I can't get any justice
I don't think I could be pregnant as I'm on the pill and I didn't throw up that night. But I could have contracted an STD off him.
I have no idea what I can do now. The guy even says hello to me in school.

umm yea there werent any witnesses cuz i dont no about you but i dont like people in the bathroom with me watching me vomit. Ohh and im 16 i dunno if i can get a laywer by myself but my moms a lawyer so if i can get the guts to tell her..i think i'll be good.

Answer 1

Get help take his *** to court, you have nothing to lose. You should also go to your parents and make sure you go to the hospital they have ways of checking these things. Dont give up, and even if there is no court justice, he will pay, there is karma you know. good luck, sorry, and dont give up.

Answer 2

Definitely act now, ASAP. I would even go for pressing charges against the police for being unsupportive and convincing you to do nothing. THEY ARE JUST as GUILTY!!! You need to bring attention to this guy, because he will do it again and again if you don't say anything. He clearly won't admit to it because it seems like he thinks he did nothing wrong or at least doesn't care (so the tape recorder thing won't work, he will deny it). You have to go to a rape crisis center, or some rape related help group because the more you do to help yourself, the more you will be believed that it happened.

You should also write a letter to the police department (it should go to someone above the people you delt with) and state that you were mis-adviced and brushed aside and the officers should be disciplined because they took your case as if it was a case of a stolen watch or something.

The longer you wait the longer the rapist will have the upper hand, not only in the case (that will be against him) but also in your life.

Sorry to hear this and I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 3

the police department sound like complete insensitive idiots....go talk to a rape counselor and a lawyer....if the cops wont help you there are other ways to go about it......Go talk to the District Attorney...if he wont do anything find another lawyer and tell him your story I bet he can push your case through the system.....Remember its not about winning your case its about letting others know that he has done this horrible thing so that it doesnt happen to some other girl. Your strength to seek justice is abmirable because most grown women dont have the guts to take the first steps....Good Job and be proud of yourself for what you have done.....just putting the word out by starting a lawsuit will be enough to warn ppl of his bad intentions.....Good Luck and dont give up on getting justice for yourself and everyone else that he could hurt.

Answer 4

Wow, that's some pretty serious stuff there. I already feel bad that I'm not going to be a lot of help.

First of all, I would think you have a right, responsibility, and duty to press charges despite what the police are telling you. It's sad that you (probably) won't get justice, but let it play itself out. Let him sit there in court and plead innocent. Let him have to spend money on defense. Take the justice you can get.

Tell the principal in your school what happened. This is SERIOUS.

There are many victim's groups you can go to. Call them. Get help. You are the VICTIM here. A lot of IDIOTS in this society may make TRY to make you feel otherwise. Don't let them.

Answer 5

First of all I’d like to say that I am very sorry this happened to you. And you cannot let this guy get away with rape, you might want to see your school counselor and see if there is any way that he/she can help you with this situation and make the public aware of what went on. I mean that guy is still out in the public he could do this to another student. I can’t believe the police wouldn't help you. Why don’t you try calling this number 1-800-656-HOPE it is a free 24-hour hotline for victims of sexual assault offered by The Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network (RAINN) they might be able to provide with information of bringing this guy down. You might also want to check out their web site www.rainn.org

Answer 6

I'm so sorry that happened to you. The best thing that I can say is to be very persistant with this. Keep notifying the police that you would like to take him to court. Get yourself a very good lawyer because you're gonna need. What the police said was true it will be very hard to prove that you didn't consent. I hope you make it through this.

Answer 7

A family member did something similar to me. And tried to do it to my sister. We eventually told our whole family about it and now our half our family has disowned us, and the other half is on our side. It really hurts to have everything broken up, and have people hate us, but in the end, it was worth it to speak up. Let people know what he did, but you have to be strong and accept that there will be a lot of rumors about you and that some people will target you as a liar and an attention seeker or whatever. Just remember that you were there, not them, and you know what happened. Don't back down. Keep to your story. You're better then he will ever be.

Answer 8

It won't be easy, but Be Brave and take him to court. Even if he is not convicted, just that fact that charges were pressed and it did go to court will send up a big red flag waving over his head for all the girls in school (and elsewhere) to see. They'll use this as a warning to stay away from him. Maybe this'll be enough to stoop him from hurting someone else.

Answer 9

You should have gone to the hospital. Even if there was a police report, theres still no proof, were there any witnesses actually seeing him do it? Is there anything? Not to mention, police are stupid. get a Lawyer!!!

Answer 10

Tomorrow bring a recorder and ask him Why did he rape you and you will have it all on tape for proof and also bring it to the cops or go to the cops and get wired where they can hear him talk and they can just bust him then and there.