Guys, if you really love a woman, you will want to see her as often as possible, right? Right now I am in an LDR, and though we only live 3.5 hours apart, I rarely see him. He visited me in September, then wanted me to come to him in October, which I did. It was a disastrous trip; I was involved in a minor accident on the way up and more car trouble on the way back. He won't be able to see me til Xmas break. To my mind, that's a long time. I know we're college students who don't have much time, but I would think that if he really cared about seeing me, he'd come visit me over the next available weekend instead of waiting so long. I just feel that his long delay is a poor repayment to me after all the trouble I experienced and the effort I put into visiting him. He says he loves me and we talk on the phone every night, but I'm just not seeing it. Should I conclude that he doesn't love me? Are my concerns legitimate, and should I break up with him?
2006-11-16 08:53:23 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
long distance just doesn't work I've been there and it's hard when he has all these other things he has to do and there is no time for you and him to get together better off just friends.
2006-11-16 08:56:24 · answer #1 · answered by cutiepie81289 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Long distance relationships are tough at the best of times but when your in post secondary schools must be even more difficult because of the pressures of wanting good grades, some partying and financially. I also am in a LDR and live 2.5 hours from my girl. We do see each other each weekend and like yourself spend lots of times talking on Ma Bell. Your mate probably has a lot on his plate and would you and as such are not able to give 100% to your relationship. With mine we are much older than you and are already established within our careers. Do not give up just yet on this young man but do please discuss with him concerns that you have at present. Communications is the most valuable asset in any relationship and if you two can do so honestly and in a mature manner then a lot of your pressures/problems can be resolved. Best of luck and keep up with your studies and soon enough, even if it is still a couple of years away, you may be living a lot closer together and able to see each other when and where you want.
2006-11-16 09:01:59 · answer #2 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He may love you but he isn't acting like a boyfriend. He isn't living up to your expectations. I don't think you are asking too much, but you might have lives too busy with school and working to be able to maintain a relationship.
We all have someone we love that we can't be with.
I made the mistake as a college student having a LTR. I figured as soon as we married I would see him more, he would love me so much when we got married that our life together would be what I longed to get from him. But, being married was worse.
What you see is what you get. If he can't take time to see you now, he will be just as busy if not more in the future.
I kept waiting for the future we were working on....the problem that it never came.
Be realistic about what you need and want and then expect that.
2006-11-16 09:02:29 · answer #3 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i could inform you what you desire to take heed to and say that he's no longer dishonest yet I won't do this through fact, besides the certainty that denial could be a convenience zone, it does no longer set you loose. think of logically a 2d: a million) Why would they say "i such as you"? 2) Why are they flirting so frequently? 3) Why is he asserting you will mess it up? Mess what up? If there is no longer something occurring between them what precisely are you able to decrease to rubble? If my male friends' gfs suspected me i'd only reassure them no longer something is going on and that's that. it does no longer decrease to rubble friendships with my male friends. 4) Contacting you extra or much less does no longer represent something. If somebody cheats, it does no longer unavoidably propose they're going to touch you much less. in certainty, on occasion, the guilt will cause them to touch you extra and be even sweeter. 5) No guy would inform you in the event that they have been dishonest. Telling would propose he would lose having the better of the two worlds. It seems such as you be attentive to, deep down, that he's dishonest yet you're convincing your self that he's no longer and, by potential of penning this, you're searching for reassurance that he's no longer. even nonetheless he has reassured you, your instinct continues to be telling you otherwise. The question is whether or no longer you're leaving him, forgiving him or attending to the backside of it and then figuring out. it is as much as you yet i will inform you from adventure, that a relationship the place you consistently ask your self and are looking over your shoulder, is psychological torture. you do no longer believe him or you does no longer have appealed to others for an opinion and suggestion. believe, quite in an prolonged-distance relationship, is an significant factor.
2016-12-10 10:22:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe he doesnt have money to drive 3 and half hours away or maybe he has lots of work and homework. dont conclude he doesnt love you if you talk every night if he cant make it to were u are why dont u go where he is for the weekend. if you love him it shouldnt be a problem even if u have work/homework. but then again if your doubting the relationship its probably a cause of concern either u dont trust him or you want a different man. i would just drive to where ever he is and surpise him and see what happens and go from there. good luck
2006-11-16 09:01:26 · answer #5 · answered by marynew8 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you make it through you will be one of few. You may be happier if you try for a closer relationship. the odds are in favor. Unless both put lots of efforts then one always feels the other is not doing enough, sometimes both even feel the other is not doing enough. Do what will mak you happy. If you break up and get to live closer later then things can always come back to life.
2006-11-16 08:58:20 · answer #6 · answered by ronnny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I once had to go seven months without seeing my boyfriend. it was very hard but i realized that love is strong. and our love could endure the distance and the time. Ofcourse sometimes you are going to miss your boyfriend and have doubts that he loves you like you love him, but trust me...everyone feels that way sometimes. Dont throw away all you have because you think that he doesnt love you. If he calls you everynight and you love him, then just wait. things will get better!
2006-11-16 09:05:41 · answer #7 · answered by spicyangel8 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
GIRL UR LUCKY THAT HE'S ONLY 3 1/2 HOURS AWAY..mines stationed in texas and i only get to see him, if im lucky once a month for like 3-4 days at a time. right now he's in kuwait so i cant see him till feb. so i would suggest if he cant see you...go see him..its only 3 hrs away!! i would die for the chance of mine being only 3 hrs away
2006-11-16 08:57:58 · answer #8 · answered by stefanie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are only 3 hours and 30 minutes from him i wouldn't say that was long distance. but 35 hours would be. you have to listen to your heart and what it tells you to do, I my wish i had a girl friend even if she was 3days away. He does call you every night, this should say something about how he feels if he never called then i would think something about that. but listen to you heart it will tell you what to do.
2006-11-16 09:01:59 · answer #9 · answered by jamnjims 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he should make the effort to see you. that makes no sense that he's your man and he cant come see you. can you go see him?
2006-11-16 08:57:19 · answer #10 · answered by MiaDiva28 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋