I(I’m a male) told my close female friend how I felt about her and she said we should remain friends.She said it wouldn't feel right going further.
She said she don't deserve my feelings---meaning??
Said she can’t imagine me not being in\part of her life---this mean anything???
We left on good terms,agreeing to remain friends always.After this happened I went quiet on her for over a week to clear my head!She txt me once asking why I went quiet and also txt my mate asking him. I got bck in touch on Monday and her reply mentioned nothing bout what I said(how I felt about her).
I txt her saying how impt the friendship is to me and apologised if I made her feel uncomfortable and hope that we’re cool.Why hasn’t she txt bck for over a day now??(we’re usually in touch everyday!)I say anything wrong?
Would she be feeling odd??Behave differently towards me??Anyone been in this situation themselves?If so,what happened?
Why has she suddenly gone quiet on me??
2006-11-16 07:58:42 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
she must like u too for saying that she can't imagine being a part of ur life, sounds like she feel she doesn't deserve how u feel about her. As for getting quiet mayb she's clearing her head too(seriously) or mayb she was busy. But honestly, give her some time to think things over becuz it could've been too sudden for her but a hands to u for expressing ur feelings which I'm sure is not going to go unnoticed. Just give it some time & she may realize how she feel bout u too.
2006-11-16 08:13:59 · answer #1 · answered by anna 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Speaking from experience I have always felt uncomfortable when a man I don't have romantic feelings for declares his affection/ desire for me. No matter how good the intention the parameters have changed and it takes some adjustment to get used to that. You are also afraid that the person will go on hoping, or may want to make you change your mind.
Saying that you don't deserve someone's feelings is a way to be kind, to say that they should be bestowed on someone who can reciprocate - a bit like the 'it's not you it's me' line used in break ups when you don't want the other person to feel bad.
As long as you try to behave as normally as possible and don't refer to your feelings again the situation will go back to normal eventually, but it will take time because now she is treading carefully.
2006-11-16 08:04:22 · answer #2 · answered by lianhua 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In this case, I would suggest to ride it out. Do not bring up your feelings again. At least not now. She knows how you feel and is trying to sort out if you two can possibly go back to the way it was before. Don't give up on her, but don't push.
This may sound strange, but watch the movie "Snow Day". It is a kids movie, but watch it and look at the relationship between the teenage boy and his best friend who happens to be a girl... Once you watch it, imagine it as your situation with your best friend. No, it is not the same scenario, but the emotions are the same.
Good Luck!
2006-11-16 08:08:25 · answer #3 · answered by heather f 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's probably a bit worried that she would lose you which she says when she says she can't imagine you not being a part of her life. No doubt she's confused, and I think you may have complicated things a bit by ignoring her for a week. This is always the danger when you fall for a friend, i always think that it is more important to put your feeling to one side and continue the friendship as it is. This has happened to me, and i never spoke to my friend again which was gutting. I wish we hadn't complicated matters, and we'd probably still be friends now. Stay friends and nothing else, its better than losing that person for good.
2006-11-16 08:06:12 · answer #4 · answered by Jo_Diva 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
she's probably gone quiet on you because of fear. you took friendship one step further and she couldn't deal with it. her saying it wouldn't feel right going any further seems to be the key words. you were best buds but now you put a new slant on the relationship. you did the right thing by txtg how important the friendship is and your apologizing if she felt uncomfortable. you just have to sit tight and hope the friendship is strong enough to matter on her part. she has a heavy plate right now, probably fighting with herself what her own feelings are. give her space, if she cares for you, as a friend, she will be touch with you.
2006-11-16 08:12:43 · answer #5 · answered by try 2 help 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I have been this is situation before on her side. The reason she texted you in the first place was because she wanted to make sure you guys were still friends. Once you texted her back she saw that you guys were still cool but now needs some time to herself. Dont worry she will come back and talk to you. The sad thing is she wont have feelings for you. So maybe it is better if you guys didnt talk for bit. You need to get over her and move to another girl.
2006-11-16 08:03:53 · answer #6 · answered by TroubleRose 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it may have just been a shock to find out how you felt and she is probably taking some time to think about it also. She probably said that she doesn't deserve your feelings because she doesn't like you like that and she doesn't want you to waste your feelings on her and she may not want to get together with you since you are good friends....girls always worry that if they start dating one of their good friends that something will go wrong and the relationship and friendship will be ruined and she may not want that to happen. Just give her some time to adjust...it might be akward for a while.
2006-11-16 08:04:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is not into you.
You were probably number five or six on her list of prospects.
She txt you after you went quiet because she wanted to make sure you were OK, and not suicidal. It wasn't about you, it was more about relieving any guilt trips she might have had.
She hasn't responded to you because, now that she knows you are OK, she is afraid of leading you on and giving you false hope that you two could ever be an item.
I know it sucks, but that's how it is.
2006-11-16 08:07:33 · answer #8 · answered by Jack C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She likes you as a friend, but not as a lover. Sometimes best friends live together for life and end up married for 70 years, But sometimes for one of them there ios nothing there but soiterly or brotherly love, This sounds lioke your friend. She can't help it.
I once had a frioend I loved to death, but once we got personel it wa sloike kisssing my sister. Nothing there of reithe rof us. But we still love each other as frioends and although we haven't seen each other in ages I don't think nothing has changed.
Enjoy yuo friend and consider her feelings. It's possible you may be too close for friendship and need to put some distance betwen your relations and allow it to cool off by making new friends.
She can't help how she feels and neither an you.
2006-11-16 08:07:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're being needy. She's told you she's not interested in you the way you are in her so you have to live with it or you'll upset her.
She's gone quiet on you because you went quiet on her for over a week remember?
You need to act like a man again or she'll start wondering why she should even be friends.
2006-11-16 08:06:48 · answer #10 · answered by charlie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋