Is this neglect?

Question

What do you think of this situation: Sally lives in a 3 story apartment on the second floor with her two children (a toddler and a 6 month old). The laundry room is on the bottom floor. If Sally waits until her children are taking their naps is it ok for her to run downstairs for just a few minutes to wash and dry her clothing. Is this neglect? Tell me what you think. Her mother thinks that it is.
Also, the toddler sleeps in a secure bed with the door shut. He is just 2 so he still sleeps in a crib.
And, is this any different than having a two story house with the children upstairs and the laundry room down stairs? Thank you, Sally will appreciate any input. She really just wants her children to be clean and safe.

Answer 1

I have encountered this problem myself, however, I happened to know at the time a CPS (child protective service) worker, so I had asked her this exact question her response to me was...Get a monitor, take it with you, go down only long enough to cycle the laundry and then immedietly come back upstairs, but only do it this way if you cannot get a neighbor to come over for 5 min, otherwise wait until children are awake, and you all go down or take it all to a laundry mat with kids. But since her mom is so worried about it, I would have her ask mom to watch the kids while she gets her laundry done.

Answer 2

As long as Sally is only running down to switch the laundry between machines, I would say no it's not, especially if the kids have secure beds. Hanging out in the laundry room waiting for the clothes to dry would be a bit much though. And it's way easier than hauling the laundry AND two small children up and down to do the laundry when they're awake.

Answer 3

It isn't neglect if she runs downstairs, does her laundry, then runs back up - all within an extremely short amount of time. I've had to do that myself in past, and no one accused me of being neglectful. Just tell her the faster she can run, the better it is for her children. And her mother can have all the opinions she wants, it's still none of her business as long as Sally is looking after her kids, they are well fed and clean. If the kids are happy and Sally is happy, then people should really just butt-out.

Answer 4

Tough call. If the door is locked and Sally just drops stuff off and comes back up, a minute or two would be okay as long as you have a cell phone with you (explanation below) and a baby monitor would be good. Staying downstairs and folding, etc. Not good.

The difference between an apartment and house:

Even in a big house you are much closer than an apartment.

Apartment buildings have lots of people in and out of them. Not so for the house.

The house is self-contained. Danger to the kids would be easier to see, smell or spot.

If the smoke alarm goes off in the house you can get to the kids faster with less in between you. If the alarm goes off in the apt. you have to fight your way through people coming down to get to your kids.

If the 2 yr old wakes up and goes looking for you in a house, he will search the house and find you before looking outside. In an apt. he will look in the apt. and then start looking in the hallways of the building. He won't be in the crib forever and he'll pick the worst time to surprise you with his new ability to get out of bed by himself.

BTW Some 2's would wander outside the house and there are door buzzers to alert parents so they know they have an escapee.

If you fall down the stairs carrying laundry in your house you could probably get to a phone for help. Unless you have a cell on you, if you do something silly like sprain your ankle you not only will have a hard time getting help for you, you won't be able to get back upstairs.

Bottom line, as safe as you obviously feel in your apartment building, the increased distance, walls and strangers puts them at a greater risk when left alone than if you were in a house.

Answer 5

It is a hard question. Is the laundry part of her apartment but just on another floor? Lots of people have two story houses and leave the children asleep upstairs while they do laundry in the basement. This isn't abuse it is necessary. If she is leaving her apartment to go to another area downstairs it wouldn't be neglect unless she is leaving them for hours but it may be unwise as she won't be able to hear the children if they should cry or get into trouble. If she is a single parent this may be the only time she can do laundry. Allot can happen to a child in a short time but this kind of thing like SIDS can happen if you are in the next room. Unless she is sitting in the laundry room waiting for her things to dry I would say it isn't abuse. Unwise but not abuse. I think maybe her mother is just overly cautious and maybe looking for trouble.

Answer 6

If the children are secure and there is no way of them getting into any kind of danger, I would think that it would be alright. I would highly suggest taking one of those baby monitors with her so she can hear everything too. Like you said, to me, it seems the same as putting the baby to sleep upstairs and running downstairs to do the laundry but just put the laundry in and come right back up or like taking a shower while your baby is napping.

Answer 7

No way. It's not neglect if she locks the door behind her, brings a monitor with her, and comes back up after she loads the clothes. I mean, it's better to do that than to get some neighbor she doesn't even know to come in and watch them. There really isn't much that could happen with them in a secure place like that for five minutes, and even if something did happen, like the building caught on fire, the authorities wouldn't blame her for going down to throw her clothes in the wash. As long as the door was locked, it's the same amount of risk as someone in a house going down to their basement to do the wash.

Answer 8

I hope its not neglect because if it is im responsible. I leave my baby when shes sleeping and only if shes sleeping and im sure shes not going to wake up for at the most like 10 minutes so I can run to the laundry room in my apartment building. I make sure to lock the door and sometimes ill take teh baby monitor with me. i certainly dont think its neglectful at all. Its not like shes sitting there staring at them to make sure they are ok 24/7.

Answer 9

As long as Sally comes right back up after doing what she needs to do it's find. Just dont stand down there while everything is washing and drying. Also make sure that she is locking the door behind her so that no intruders can enter the apartment while she is down there.

Answer 10

Most parents have done things like this to get thier daily chores done. When the busy children sucomb to the afternoon nap it is natural to want to use that time to get "ahead". She just needs to use her good judgement. Taking a monitor is a great idea.
Be quick. Be as watchful as you can as to who comes into the building. AND- dont tell the mother-in-law when she does her laundry. Or- get the mother-in-law to come over and sit up there while she gets her clothes clean. ;)