How do I tell him I care about him without freaking him out? I really enjoy being with him, we do a lot of things together, its not just about the sex, we are good friends, too. I think he knows how I feel, but I want to be his girlfriend, I dont want to be his friend with "benefits" anymore. What should I do?
2006-11-16 01:52:02 · 37 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Tell him you care about him and you would be interested in a relationship. Just don't get too bummed out if he doesn't feel the same, because it's possible he just likes to have you as a friend and enjoys the sexual side as well. This happens often, has happened to me all too often. And, if this is the case, enjoy him as a friend and tell him you cannot have sex with him anymore because you have feelings. If he is a true friend, he will either accept that or date you. If he doesnt want to date you, try to find a guy who you can spend time with and don't sleep with him until you date him, this will prevent a future similar situation. It has happened to me far too many times, and I now must wait to sleep with men, though I am tempted, gotta have self control to protect yourself!
2006-11-16 01:55:22 · answer #1 · answered by Emily 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, if he ONLY considers you a friend "with benefits" it is obvious that he doesnt care about you like a boyfriend will. If he really liked you and respected you he would have asked you already. Maybe he just wants some booty with no commitment. In the other hand, if you are feeling this way you should talk to him and see what happens. Be honest with him and if he is a jerk and doesnt care just dump him. You are worth more than that. Just that you know, for next time dont sleep with a guy who considers you a friend. that makes u look like an "easy" girl, ok.
2006-11-16 02:15:43 · answer #2 · answered by Walt88 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i think you are right i am sure he knows. and he doesn't want to commit or he would. especially if you have so much in common. most women cannot have a sexual relationship with a someone without feelings getting involved. but men can. you need to tred lightly or you risk ending a friendship as well as a good sexual relationship. but if you have fallen for him and he can't reciprocate those feelings then you better sit down and re evaluate what you are doing. the pain of love that cannot be returned will eat away at you. do not do that to yourself. flat out just say how you feel and if he doesn't feel the same then stop the sex and do your best to resume your friendship without it. if this is not an option for you at this point you are in trouble already.
2006-11-16 02:00:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as he knows he can sleep with you without strings attached, he will. That's how most guys wish their lives were. Have you ever heard the saying,"Why buy the cow when you can have the milk for free."? That's the scenario here. On the other hand. My current husband and I used to be really good friends, then really good friends with really good benefits, then we started dating 1 year later and now we've been married for 2 years. You never know. It could go either way. Good luck.
2006-11-16 01:55:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men want to couple with certain types of women, others they just use for relief. If you are well educated, smart and have a life plan, men will not want to let you get away. To keep a keeper, a man will commit! Men don't mind a firm commitment, but we certainly are afraid of a liability. Make sure you are an asset and not a potential liability.
2006-11-16 02:13:35 · answer #5 · answered by Dan K 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What ever you do , you WILL freak him out, the best way for yourself is to just tell him straight in the face, that you do want to share his life, not as a friend , but as a girlfriend, if he runs away, all the better, is better then you hanging in mid air.
2006-11-16 02:12:26 · answer #6 · answered by jade s 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why should things change when you've opened up the candy store for free? Why do women (or girls- or boys for that matter) think free means it will give me commitment? No thing in this world is free if its worth it---Close the candy store (your legs) and be friends or be more and let him adjust to the change of pace- Toys are out there to keep you happy and he can realize what it is he really likes about YOU! Good luck!
2006-11-16 01:56:57 · answer #7 · answered by ARTmom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1 out of 2 things could happen. If you tell him how you feel he might have the same feelings for you or he might just tell you that he doesn't see you in that way. You need to be with someone who has the same feelings for you. Your best bet is just ask him how he feels and what does he want. How long do you really want to be someones booty call??
2006-11-16 01:56:35 · answer #8 · answered by Melissa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
even if he thinks he knows how you feel, you should tell him your feelings how you feel about him, and if he insists on just being friends, then you can't push him into a relationship. And if you don't want to be friends with benefits, then tell him.
2006-11-16 01:55:35 · answer #9 · answered by superboredom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are asking for trouble!!!!!! He has clearly stated that he just wants to be friends. Sorry to inform you but it is about the sex. If you can't seperate your feelings for him then I suggest you get out of this friend with "benefits" relationship.
2006-11-16 01:56:31 · answer #10 · answered by inquisitor1125 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋