my bf wants to marry me. we love so much each other. i do love him alot and hes super good to me. But i dont feel about getting married cuz i feel gotta know him better first ( im afraid of failing n' we had just met for 2 years); i have belief of just gettin marry ONCE cuz family is super important for me and i dont want my first kids being raised by differents men and also i am a bit scared of the fact of getting divorced someday ( i wouldnt like me to happen the same happened to my mother), too. im 20 years old and im still in college... lackin' 2 years to finish. my bf works and he graduates from college... so we wouldn't have too much financial issues... and i work too. By the way it's not that my bf is pushing me to marry but he really wants me next to him, help me keep going with the college ( as long we have Long distance Relationship, he wants to take me to his country )... but i am too united to my family also like to let go that way
hes family loves me too.. :-)
2006-11-16 01:15:52 · 22 answers · asked by *live,laugh,love* 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
college is hard and stressful maybe you should wait for 2 more years until you graduate I think your thoughts are very mature. If it's true love trust me it will be there and the anticipation of the wait will make your marriage even better. It is better to be sure rather than marry in a rush only to have regrets later. Don't let your mom or anyone elses divorce or relationships scare you off from happiness things just happen sometimes. if you work on your relationship before and after marriage it will be fine. I think you 2 should go to pre marriage counseling to air out your fears and anything else the 2 of you need to talk about that may require a little guidance. Honey you are young and have hopefully along life ahead of you enjoy yourself because when you get married you need to be committed to your husband and him to you. Good luck and God bless you and your relationship also I'm glad you have strong family ties it's OK to visit your hubby's country but to live there may be more than you could bear it is very hard to be away from family especially when they are far far away. My youngest was going to move to Georgia(we live in Ohio) 2 years ago which is only a 10 hour drive and i thought i would go crazy if she did instead what i did was drove her now to job hunt, apt. hunt etc and while we were there she decided thank god she didn't want to move after all. It's your life but with your strong familt ties I'm sure your family would go crazy and you also if you moved to another country
2006-11-16 01:29:11 · answer #1 · answered by katlady927 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wait a sec, take you to his country?? Is he not a singaporean?? 1st thing 1st, you 2 are in love, but how about living together? Is religion? Yours? How would your family think? If not so, how long can the love last, can i stay the same or be thicker through the times of difficulties? He wants you to go to his country, how about you, the food there? the environment there?? The language there? And so many other questions that you should ask yourself, if it is okie for everything, it is okie for you to go ahead, but pls wait till you are out of school to get married, 20 is really too young. Think twicw, if he loves you as much as you think, he will wait. Don't get married in a rush.
2006-11-16 01:26:49 · answer #2 · answered by jade s 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Wait..... If your not 1000% u don't need to do it. Your young and the first thing you need to do is finish your education so you can go out here and get your own money. If he loves you like you think he will understand. The things you want at 20 are not the same things you want at 25 so look deep before you leap.
2006-11-16 01:19:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wait... love will endure.
Remember
Love = Sacrifice
Dont let your "feelings" make your discisions. Be smart.
I got married when I was 20 (13years and counting) and we should have waited. College took longer for both of us and we had kids before we finished. Its like starting in a hole with a spoon to digg your way out. Even though our relationship strong hind sight tells me we should have waited.
2006-11-16 01:18:10 · answer #4 · answered by King 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you have any doubts about getting married now, or too tied up with your family to let go, then now is not the right time to get married. If you feel like you should wait, then you should follow your judgment.
2006-11-16 01:21:09 · answer #5 · answered by angeleyes 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you really truelly absolutely love each other then what's the rush? Love knows no pressure. You are to "in it" to make a clear headed mature decision, step outside yourself and look at the whole thing objectively. If you do go through it, please get pre-marital councilling, it coul make all the difference.
2006-11-16 01:21:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
i think you should go for it nothing will last forever everything has an end and there no tell if you can find someone that will stay with you forever and if you get marry don;t have kids for 2 to 4 years that enough time to know him better don;t be scared and don;t make any mistake as your mom did
2006-11-16 01:20:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
im sorry you could wait another 20 years and still not know if you may break up --- if you marry then you need to keep time for yourselves --- keep falling in love
i was married for 30 years -- the kids left and we found we did not really know each other anymore --- we had given it all to the kids
2006-11-16 01:20:40 · answer #8 · answered by Waterdragon 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Just talk to him and let him know that you don't feel like you are ready to get married yet. If he really loves you, then he will respect your feelings.
2006-11-16 01:27:45 · answer #9 · answered by r_finewood 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
All you cando is initiate chatting along with her in a delightful way. possibly you may recommend you have lunch mutually. start up the friendship off only like with everyone else- communicate and proportion info.
2016-10-15 15:12:47 · answer #10 · answered by feliu 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋