He is not just the boy friend i met in the street he is actually my friend, he is a nice guy, we have respect for each other, but later we find out we both like each other, in short we kissed only kissed nothing more, he seems boring, if i send him 4 sms i got 1 reply if i send 1, 2--3 got no reply he dnt even call. Now i have this admirer, he calls 3-5 times a day no matter what the time is, he always makes me laugh and often leaves my heart melts. Now it seems like i like my friend/bf and like the humor of my admirer. Please help, i don`t wanna hurt my boyfriend, can i tell him about this admirer? or what i feel for him is it really love?
2006-11-16 01:11:24 · 33 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
the admirer, i know him 6 mos ago... and i dont have a bf that time yet.
2006-11-16 01:12:57 · update #1
No, it's not love, child. You need to grow up before you start worrying about this.
2006-11-16 01:13:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well considering you say you rspect each other I think thats a good start! Dont over analyse everything too much, I learnt that the hard way, just accept things for what they are and see where that leads you. My current bf only ever texts maybe twice a week, rings me once a week and I only see him 1 - 3 times a week, it works because he does respect me and my personal space and is willing to let me go at my own pace. Yeh, he seems boring somtimes and unlike my ex (which is a good thing) but thats becuase he's reliable and understands I need 'me' time now and again, but we always enjoy our time together! Just enjoy spending time with him, you usually find that you wake up one day and realise how you 'really' feel about someone!
2006-11-16 01:51:50 · answer #2 · answered by Trixychick 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO dont tell him. Play the game it dating, not to hurt anyone but to figure it out of what you want. I am not talking about just sex but two people tht compliment each other, a lifes long term partner, if that is what your looking for. Remember you are dating it's not marriage now is the time for you to find the right person not the first or worst, you stay with him for the wrong reasons. Take it slow if it is ment to be (and you work on it) it will happen if you both feel that way. You dont want to get rid of one and find out the one your with then , is not the one (or worst) was the one all along. Remember some people have differents motives, some people play the game well, just for sex, money or other things they want. Not every one out there is nice and put on great faces to get there way
2006-11-16 01:29:35 · answer #3 · answered by Mr. Wonderful 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said that you and your friend who eventually turned to be your bf later,..like and respect each other....but remember that "liking is different from loving". You said that you have kissed each other...so what!!! What's in a kiss anyway. There's something that intrigues me though...and that is when u said...he's boring. If that's the case...u are not really in love. You only love for the sake of loving. Move on girl! Give yourself a chance...a chance to know your admirer (not your bf) better.
2006-11-16 01:27:33 · answer #4 · answered by dimma59 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry. But regardless of your age or anything like that you can't possibly know if you love someone after such a short time. Love isn't the silly feeling you get, its more the being prepared to hanker down & face adversity together & still admire & respect the person you are with. Not very romantic I know....but its true none the less.
2006-11-16 01:16:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you are young, feelings of love are very confusing. There is a physiology behind "love". If someone can bring out the best of feelings in you, you automatically assume those feelings are love. You like how that person makes you feel and you want to remain stuck in that feeling. You like one aspect of your boyfriend because he is steady and trustworthy and dependable, and yet here is someone else who makes you laugh and feel light hearted, etc. etc. You will meet hundreds and thousands of people in your lifetime...all capable of bringing out many feelings in you. But as you age you learn to appreciate those aspects and gifts that each person has, and as you mature into your own life you will find that you will develop interests or decide what you want to do with your life be it something as basic and simple as just marry and raise kids. When you are at that point you will find the type of person to "fall in love with" that fills those needs and desires.
Love can be fleeting and fickle. To stay with someone and commit to them requires a whole lot more than just love. You have to look forward and say will this person be here my side all the way through and stay faithful and whatever else you are looking for, to truly know if not only you are in love, but if that love is the kind that will last and endure. Nothing is for sure, but life is short and you can't always spend it in confusion looking for something that can be here today and gone tomorrow. I think all people want stability and marriage and a life partner eventually at some point in life, unless their life is devoted to some other cause...but basically people all have the same needs.
So you see, you should really listen to your OWN heart and do what is best for you. You will have to know heartache too...you can't have it all and sometimes you have to let one thing go in order to pursue another. That's how life works...you can't have it all. Above all be honest and straightforward with people and don't play mind games or take people for fools. Love is delicate and you should always be sensitive to people's feelings.
2006-11-16 01:21:34 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are young and finding out some of the highs and los of the like/love game. Maybe your bf isn't your bf at all? Did he asked you to be his gf? When a boy likes a girl, he makes sure she knows it like your admirer, he calls he texts he makes u laugh. The bf, maybe texts u back 1 time. Try not to be so needy for constant attention, but be aware when someone is giving you attention, they probably are liking you. You are trying on boys like t-shirts, and you will find one that fits you and suits you. Just make sure you keep if all clear and you'll have less trouble. I would sit the one you think is ur bf and asked if you are bf/gf, if not, move on to mr admirer, If so, maybe you want to move on to mr Admirer? In any case, don't be a liar, or cheater and alwasy be honest and you'll do fine! Welcome to the trials and tribulations of like and love! I know you'll do just fine!
2006-11-16 01:20:28 · answer #7 · answered by Tippy's Mom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
your question is definitely confusing. It seems that the guy that's your admirer is someone that you'd want 2 be with cuz he gives you the attention you want and he makes you laugh(which always gets me liking sum1) and u said ur heart melts. You might be able to have something with that guy.If you say that your b/f is boring then you shouldn't be with him.Did he becoming boring once you dated him? I mean you said you were friends before.It just doesn't seem right that he doesn't seem 2 interested talking to you online(not sure what sms is, just instant messaging).I think you should try to return to being friends with him,let him know the chemestry isn't there anymore. and let this admirer guy know that you'd like 2 get 2 know him better.Which 1 are you asking about if it is love. again i dunno how old you are but if you haven't met sum1 then you don't truely know who they are cuz they're just showing you the sides of them they want you to see.and if you're talking about ur b/f/ friend maybe you love him as a friend,like in the caring sense but from how you described it doesn't seem like you love your b/f romantically so it's not fair for either one of you to stay in the relationship.
2006-11-16 01:19:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This one is a little complicated, I think I understand what you are saying. You have a boyfriend of 2 weeks who you have been only friends with for a long time. Now someone new and exciting has come into your life and gives you feelings that your boyfriend doesn't. I think that's right. I would go with the one who makes your heart race because your boyfriend is only a true friend and not a romantic lover.
2006-11-16 01:19:52 · answer #9 · answered by scottleigh89 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that's why you should never date or try to have a relationship with a friend. If it doesn't work out your friendship is never going to be the same. I believe what you feel for your bf is love, but your not in love with him it's a big difference. I think you should tell him that you all moved things a little too fast in the wrong direction. Also let him know you don't want to lose his friendship if that's possible. Good Luck and GOD BLESS!!!!!
2006-11-16 01:23:01 · answer #10 · answered by kryptonnite2000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you have got to be certain yourself before you tell anything to anybody. spend sometime with yourself and look deep inside yourself. ask yourself which is the guy you actually want to be with. a mistake could be bad for all three of you.
there is nothing wrong with changing partner especially when you guys have just started and your current bf doesn't treat you like he appreciates you. i say you should give the other guy some consideration. but you should never ever cheat on your bf. do not commit to the other guy until you tell your bf and breaks off with him.
exercise caution and conscientiousness when choosing. good luck.
2006-11-16 01:18:47 · answer #11 · answered by caterpillar 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋