Is this love?

Question

When a guy refuses to buy gifts for the girlfriend,does he really love this girl.I mean a girl he does not want to spend a dime on.

Answer 1

Depends if you measure love by gifts.

Answer 2

hi. i suppose it depends on how this guy likes to show his affection?
some guys like to show their affection through other means, i liked to go out once a month for a great meal and music to show how i felt, i did buy gifts but i preferred to be with the partner in person and be affectionate to them personally.
see i think you can buy gifts but when does it stop, after a while im sure youll ask yourself, are these gifts REALLY from the heart? yes some guys buy gifts and showeer their ladfies with what they earn but not every guy is the same so if this person you're on about has concerns tell her to look out for anything else that might show that the man loves her.

Answer 3

Do you have everything you want, and what do gifts mean to you? Some people have diferrent ideas on what is normal. Saying and showing love is different, If you want and need someone to give you gifts surely youll find someone who will provide that. Maybe he is saving up for something really great, or maybe he is just lazy (in an area thats somewhat important to you)

Answer 4

Well i don't think that love can be measured in terms of money, because a guy may not really love, but he will buy you gifts,i mean it's just money if he has enough of it why not, but if you measure it as the same thing then i guess he does not love you that much.

Answer 5

I think so, gifts seem to send the wrong message now days. Almost like I have to show you how much I care by going out and getting these material items that have no reflection of how I feel but are a way moreso to get you in bed.

Answer 6

maybe its a case of once bitten twice shy, buy now and definatley pay later when the lady walks out on him. love doesn't cost a cent but regret can cost a house, car or more besides dignity. paul Mcartney springs to mind. i wish i had the money to lavish my fiance with gifts. i have'nt even the money for a cheapish engagement ring a roof over our heads is more important than a present. but to answer your question it doesnt matter if its love or not, but the man isn't obliged to buy a woman anything, even for goods rendered.

Answer 7

I have found when a guy likes a girl, he wants her to know it and even the poorest boy will find a way to "gift" a girl he is interested in. Now it may not be diamonds, maybe he carries her books? That in a gift sense is called ACTS OF SERVICE. Maybe he compliments her alot? Called WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT and so on. One way to find out if he is what he should be to you, is get the book by Dr. Gary Chapman called The 5 LOVE LANGUAGES. It explains the 5 ways people express love to one another and how to learn each others love language. If you and you bf can understand one anothers style better, this might help. But if he isn't trying to doing anything to show or express his love or you aren't seeing it in these languages, he may not be that into you. Even the birds know to bring their mates something shiney. I had a bf once, who wasn't in the habit of getting or buying me things, he wasn't cheap, but I 'll tell you this, he never ever let me go without ANYTHING I wanted. One year, I wanted to go see my Grandma and he whipped out the CC and said "Go see her!" I couldn't believe it. I thought this, that when it counted, I could count on him to help where it was important to me. When we talked about it, he explained he had a hard time really knowing what to get me, because I am pretty independent, don't ask for things I don't need and he was scared if he picked something I didn't like, I wouldn't like him, so he'd just wait till HE WAS SURE I NEEDED SOMETHING. Cute huh? But I loved him for it, not just cause he whipped out the credit card, but because he knew I wanted to go but just didn't have the money to go see her myself. So maybe a sit down talk, calm and loving and get to the bottom of it, as a lifetime of no feeling special, no gifts to show appreciation, well, thats just a long time to not feel that feeling. Please don't take this as its about money, its about a generousity of spirit, and my dear, that is important. Read that book and see if you're just missing what his gift giving style of love is. Hope this helps you! Good luck!

Answer 8

does he have a dime to spend on you?..love is not measured by how much he spends on you. does he spend time with you? is he attentive to your needs (excuding material needs)? does he tell you he loves you?....showing love in a material way shows a shallow person....showing love through touch is a much deeper love.
don't get me wrong, a nice spontaneous gift every now and again won't go amiss....lol but...and there is always a 'but'......he does not have to buy you things to show his love for you....
his refusing, means you asked....don't ask and you might get!

Answer 9

I guess we see gifts as little tokens of love and by getting nothing you could imply he doesn't love her but that may not be true. However, it's not the price tag but that thought and what is true is that he doesn't want to make the girl happy because he won't make the effort. This does means that he doesn't love her.

Answer 10

Well ,,,only because he does not buy things for her it does not mean that he does not love her,,, I personaly dont care if my guy buys me things,,, when he gives me a romentic card thats enough for me,, but there is times that he will buy me big things but I always tell him not to waist money,,,, see going out with someone does not mean that he is going to pay every time,,, focus and if that girl just wants gifts then she is not the one,,,,