We have been together for 11 mos and live together for 8 mos. I know I want to marry him but he wants to get married really soon and has not mentioned an engagement ring. I always thought the ring symbolizes commit and financial stability. He could afford one but it's so close to the Holidays and we would like to move the first of the year. He has always been very responsible with money and helped me tremendously. I don't see having the money for a honeymoon or ring. We had discussed going to Vegas to get married, because we don't want a fancy ceremony, but it's not feasible at the moment and he is talking about getting married on our one year anniversary which is New Years Eve. Am I wrong to feel that if I tell people we are getting married I'm sure they are thinking were is the ring?
2006-11-16 00:23:33 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
it doesn't half to be an engagement ring. i got a promise ring when me and my husband first got together and that is what we used for the engagement ring and years later he bought a wrap to go arond the promise ring to make it prettier and i would trade it in for nothing else i love it
2006-11-16 00:27:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A ring has nothing to do with financial stability. It is a symbol of unending love, since a circle has no beginning or end - as true love seems to be!
Secondly, yes he should give you an engagement ring if he can afford one. It is a token of his effort and his interest in letting you and the world know that he's serious about wanting to make you his bride. Typically a diamond is the stone in the engagement ring because it's a symbol of endurance and beauty with it's strength and facets. But many people also use the claddaugh ring - the Irish ring with the hands holding a heart with a crown atop. Very romantic.
2006-11-17 02:15:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A ring is traditional but not mandatory,as you well know. Ask your guy for one if it's important to you. There are some beautiful engagement rings available for a couple hundred bucks - if he's too cheap or your combined finances can't swing that, niether of you will be better off being married. You are correct in that the ring is also a public sign of adult committment and an indication of stability - not just financial stability, either. For most folks, that's very important.
You may be worried about the cost of a set of rings - the engagement ring for you and wedding bands for both of you. Many couples put off the wedding band for him in order to save money initially.
What's the rush? You're obviously getting along fine just living together. I bet you have not completed your educations nor entered into a job with a promising future. Why don't you help each other get through those challenges first? Don't think running off to Las Vegas is a cheap answer - it ain't. Even if you live in Reno, there's gas money, the money for the license, hotel expenses... hey, you don't actually think you can hit town, get your license and find a licensed person to perform your ceremony all in fifteen minutes, do you? Believe me - those cute little wedding chapels that advertise in the cheap magazines are booked in advance - and they ain't cheap! My best bud in college and his girl took off to get married in Las Vegas from Los Angeles. It cost them over a thousand bucks - in 1963! And you're concerned over the cost of a ring? Hmmmm.....
2006-11-16 00:43:31 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who cares what other people think? It what's in his heart that matters. If he is planning to marry you on New Years Eve that's when you will get a ring, possibly an engagement ring along with your wedding band. As long as you know that his love for you is true a ring should not matter. The symbol of the ring is an old spin off of the string around the finger of the promised bride between tribes. It lets other dogs know that this woman is promised to another man, so back off! :)
2006-11-16 01:43:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he's calling most of the shots here. It's nothing wrong with being engaged for a little while longer. A big ceremony is not the end all to be all. However, talking about getting married is not the same as him proposing to you.
Me personally, I would want the ring as a symbol but even more, he would have to ask me. He seems to be taking a lot for granted here.
Instead of beating yourself upside the head about this, you need to sit down and talk about this with him. He needs to know how you feel.
And what ever you do, please don't start telling people that you are getting married b/c there was no proposal or ring to indicate otherwise. Put your foot down. Don't let him jip you out of any portion of "one of the most important events of your life" You'll regret it in the end.
Good Luck!!!!
2006-11-16 01:00:31 · answer #5 · answered by Wife~and~Mom 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He might have a ring already and is just waiting for the right time to give it to you...if you are planning on getting married on NYE, you might want to SERIOUSLY think about going to the Justice of the Peace for your ceremony...costs for a NYE wedding are going to be through the roof, because holiday services are always in more of a demand. You don't absolutely need an engagement ring...many brides don't get one. Instead they get an even better ring on an anniversary later down the road.
2006-11-16 01:59:51 · answer #6 · answered by VAWeddingSpecialist 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he doesn't have the money for a ring, it's ridiculous to go way in debt just so you have something on your finger. If he has made the committment to you, and you make plans for a New Year's wedding, then if people ask about a ring, tell them you are only having a wedding band. There are many women who don't have an engagement ring.
If it is extremely important to you to have one, go to qvc.com and look at the diamonique rings they have. I have several of the diamonique pieces of jewelry, and no one can tell them from real diamonds. They are not real expensive, and no one will know unless you tell them.
I hope you have a happy life together!
2006-11-16 00:42:11 · answer #7 · answered by Cat Lover 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He should get you an engagement ring that you can get a band to go with for marriage. Y'all know that y'all love eachother and that's the most important thing so you don't have to get an expensive ring to prove anything to anybody. Just tell him that you need a engagement ring to show unity. And don't worry about what other people have to say because in the end it's God,him and you. Good Luck!
2006-11-16 00:31:43 · answer #8 · answered by 2sweet4u 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey. There is no reason to worry over the ring. If you want one, tell him, he will understand. I don't have a ring either. My wedding is October 13th , 2007. Sure there is time and I know he will get me one. I'm not worried though. The ring isn't the main deal. It's each other. The ring can be stolen or lost, but with each other it won't matter. You should talk it over with him and see where it goes from there.
2006-11-16 05:17:36 · answer #9 · answered by JME 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should wait another year...1 year is too soon to make a lifetime commitment, and it sounds to me like deep inside you really want this ring. To some people it is important, to others it is not, but if it is important to you, and you are stressing about this, then wait, you are not ready. There is no need to rush to the alter, if he is really the one...he will still be the one a year from now too...and maybe you will be more financially stable. Also, don't worry aboout what others may think..its not thier relationship.
2006-11-16 00:30:34 · answer #10 · answered by catywhumpass 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Considering your relationship and that you know he is committed to you. Is the ring really important? Don't worry about what other people will think. If they ask you where your ring is, you can simply tell them that you both decided that an engagement ring wasn't necessary and that you will simply be getting wedding bands.
Now, if you really want an engagement ring, you need to sit down and tell him so.
2006-11-16 01:47:07 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋