okay so here is the deal...a couple days ago i recieved an e-mail from a girl that was friends with my boyfriend, upset because they had got into a fight...i had recently become really good friends with this other frined of my boyfriend named kelli...i had doubts and suspicion that kelli was tryin to mess around with my man..but upon convincing from my man i put that to the side and agreed to give her a chance...kelli and i became better and better friends and i began to confide in her...i also asked her and my boyfriend as well numerous times if they had ever messed around and always got the same response....back to the e-mail...in the e-mail i recieved were pictures of kelli and my boyfriend messing around.... and i want nothing to do with her now and agreed to work things out with my boyfriend only if she was no longer in the picture...am i wrong for being so pissed and not wanting to forgive her at all?
2006-11-15 18:49:20 · 15 answers · asked by brittany w 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
forgiving doesn't mean it's ok for them to wrong you again. forgiving allows YOU to be free of anger, to be free of grudges. think about it.. kelli can go on with her life happy, but you'll be miserable because you CHOSE not to forgive. the only one hurting is you. so forgiveness is not about her, hon. it's about you CHOOSING to let it go so YOU can be happy.
of course you'll have to work things out so kelli doesn't hurt you again, but you can still forgive at the same time.
2006-11-15 18:55:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Golden B,you have a very negative mother,apparently. I assume you are an adult and as such,you decide who you allow into your life. It makes no difference who the offending person is;parent,sibling,spouse;you get to decide who you have in your life and just as importantly,your child's life. Since there was an assault,it's hard to believe the police won't make an arrest. You can get a restraining order against her. It is really only a piece of paper,but you have to start somewhere. If she violates that,she will be arrested. She sounds very unstable and possibly dangerous and you certainly are justified in having her out of your life. It's a sad thing when families fall apart like this,but you are not responsible for your mothers actions and it doesn't sound as if she is,either. You could leave the door open by telling her she needs help with her anger and if she gets help,maybe you all could try to have a relationship. You deserve respect and if she can't do that,that's her decision. I hope this can be worked out but you need to do whatever you have to to protect yourself and your family from this very toxic person. Good luck!
2016-03-28 22:11:21 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are been unforgiving to the wrong person.
First of all (from your admissions), you suspected. Then all you did was just to ask each of them to reassure yourself. (pointless)
last you are as you say "pissed-off" at this Kely.
You realy should be "pissed off at your self' for allowing yourself into a relationship with such "no morals ata all" individual as "your man" or boyfriend or what ever you call him.
perhaps you may see the "wrong of your ways" when you receive the next E-mail, showing pictures of "him' and another one of your "friends' messing around. EOM
2006-11-15 18:56:47 · answer #3 · answered by dorianalways 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Way too complicated. Dump the guy, get an education so that yo can spell and find the key to make capital letters...then worry about this stuff. Because this stuff is SO insignificant, years from now you will just hake your head.
However, in the meantime, you can be mad at your boyfriend. Although why you would want this guy as your boyfriend is beyond me.
2006-11-15 18:55:00 · answer #4 · answered by huckleberry 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forgiveness doesn't mean you have to trust her. I believe that you you should forgive, other wise you hold on to that anger for so long it eats away at you or builds up and its not worth it. Forgive those that wrong you just I have forgiven your transgressions should be something we all strive to live by. At some point we all need to be forgiven for something, I wouldn't trust her ever again most likely, but I would forgive her.
-NmD!
2006-11-15 19:06:14 · answer #5 · answered by NoMaD! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Brittany, I would kick both their A S S E S to china. Your boy friend that lie to you and cheated on you. You trusted him and took his word that there was nothing going on. He has made a fool out of you and you want to work things out with him!!! They both are at fault and you should get rid of both liers'. You could never trust them again.Yes you should be very pissed off.Do what you have to do.
Clowmy
2006-11-15 19:08:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kelli and your bf both do not deserve your friendship.
Move on. Forgive them both. They deserve each other.
You do yourself harm trying to keep up angry appearances with them.
Forget them and treat them as casual acquaintances. Get a good bf that you love and TRUST.
2006-11-15 18:55:14 · answer #7 · answered by ignoramus 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are wrong, if this relation happened before you two got together. That's in the past. Only thing is, tell him you understand that, but they shall not spend time by themselves, because that will be the end of your relation.
2006-11-15 18:55:31 · answer #8 · answered by cibercitizen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girl you are totally justified to want her out of thepicture. If she was really a friend she would have been honest with you.
But also you need to ask yourself if your man lied to you too, then what else has he lied about and can you really trust him again?
Trust and communication are key in a successful relationship.
Good Luck!
2006-11-15 18:56:36 · answer #9 · answered by computergrl69 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah they are both very wrong
a true friend wouldn't mess around with her friend's boyffirned
and a true boyfrined wounldn't mess sround with his girlfrined's frined.
i think they are like making fun of you from what i see
an di don't think it's a matter of forgiving or not..
how do u you feel about it??
if it bithers you, tell your boyfriend or your friend
2006-11-15 18:56:30 · answer #10 · answered by smoothie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋