I am at my wits end right now trying to figure out how to stop my son from hitting us all the time. When we are out and either me or his dad is holding him and someone stops to talk to us my son will start hitting whoever is holding him it is so embarassing. He will hit and throw a tantrum when we need to leave a toy or someone he is playing with, I try to talk him out of his tantrums but I cant get close enough without being hit and sometimes kicked (in the face) if he is laying down. I know it is normal for a toddler to hit sometimes when they are frustrated but this is way over the top! At bedtime he will hit me as soon as I put him down and he wont let me tuck him in because he's standing there swatting at me. I always end up just walking away and letting him cry himself to sleep, I really hate doing that because it seems so mean, but its better than me going in and losing my temper at him. I dont know why he's doing this we are very careful about what he sees on TV and all. Help!
2006-11-15 16:13:08 · 10 answers · asked by erin_marie360 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
today was the worst.. throwing a tantrum right at the front door of the grocery store, where everyone PLUS all the cashiers could see. I cried all the way home.
2006-11-15 16:33:45 · update #1
Normal. Let me tell you, my son is 2 an will be 3 the end of this week and he is in hitting mode. He is ALWAYS hitting his brother for the little things. He also throws a fit in the stores when he can't have what he wants. We use to give into him but it only made it worse each time. We are finally not giving in so much. I use to be embarrassed to spank in public but now i don't care. I figure if someone has something to say then they are not a parent and need to shut their mouths. If you don't discipline them people look at you as a bad parent, if you do discipline them your a bad parent. You can't win either way. It makes it difficult when people cry wolf to CPS when they see someone disciplining their kid. When i am at home I just put him in his room, shut the door and wait it out. Most the time he tires himself out and falls asleep.
When I am in public i pop his hand or bottom an tell him no. If he whines he whines, like i said people without kids can't say anything. And the people who do have kids and want to put their 2 cents in probably give/gave in to their child and it probably will/did cause problems later.
Below are some helpful resources. Some will say diffrent than others but it is up to you on how you take control of the situation.
http://www.heptune.com/tantrum.html
http://www.dime-co.com/family/toddler_temper_tantrums.shtml
http://www.olderchildadoption.com/parenting/tempertantrums.htm
http://www.healthatoz.com/healthatoz/Atoz/common/standard/transform.jsp?requestURI=/healthatoz/Atoz/hc/par/info/tantrums.jsp
2006-11-15 16:27:25 · answer #1 · answered by mystique_dragon4 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes. They can get very frustrated at this age because there is so much they want to be doing and saying and they simply can't. The one thing that you don't want to do is hit them back because that just reinforces that hitting is a solution. First tell them in no uncertain terms that hitting is wrong. Follow up the next hit with, "Don't hit Mommy" and lead them to a time out chair. Just 2 minutes for a 2 year old, but keep taking him back to it if he gets out. Don't start the 2 minutes until he stays. A timer he can see is best for this. He will probably be much better as a 3 year old if you can nip this in the bud. Good luck.
2016-03-28 22:06:15 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Spanking will only encourage him to hit you back and this is also the wrong message to give your son. As you would be telling him it is ok to hit.
You will need to give him what is called a time out. You can either use a chair or a spot on the floor where he can not play or watch the tv. The child stays in this spot accourding to their age so since your child is two then he stays there for two min and it increases accouding to his age... 3 years old then 3 min and so on. At the beginning you can give him one warning then, then if he contunes straight into the time out spot. Then no warning just straight into the timeout spot. If he trys to leave just put him back and start his time again until he stays there.
After he has done his time out, go to his level and tell him why you put him there and get him to say sorry for his behaviour. Then tell him that you love him and give him a hug. but you have to be very consistant with this type of consiquence. NEVER tell him he is bad. Let him know that it is his behavoir that you are not happy with.
Well I hope this helps you out. Just to let you know my two year old does the same thing, she is now not hitting as much, and we are still working on this issue too.
2006-11-15 16:46:56 · answer #3 · answered by crazy_mama_kris 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him it hurts mommy and as soon as he does this put him in the naughty chair and tell him he is not to get up. If you have to hold him there so he can not hit you. and keep him there for two minutes or at least he stops heating you. Tell him evertime he hits you he goes into this spot or chair or wherever and if you have to at the grocer store toy store or whever go into the bathroom or right at that spot hold him and tell him NO NO IT hurts so and so and hold him so he can not hit anyone and make him stand sit or somwhere in the store. I know you understand you have to get this under control b4 he gets older bc it will get worse just try those things and see if it works
GOOD LUCK
2006-11-15 18:42:48 · answer #4 · answered by knowssignlanguage 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know the feeling. My son however is a charmer in front of other people and they allthink i am nutts wheni teel themhe is the devil.... but he tries to hit all the time. Honestly i think it is a 2 yr ols thing for some kids. Its a frustration thing, really. I know you dont want to hear that, you want a solution...i am still trying to find one. At home he gets time out, sent to his room, the usual stuff... but until they get teh communication barrier out of the way, i think thats the only way they know how to communicate. I think it is a time issue, as frustrating as it is...cause even though my son does hit when hes mad, he isnt an angry kid, hes quite comical, and happy, but his temper is something else!!! i dont know what else to tell you,
2006-11-15 16:24:24 · answer #5 · answered by bangbanks72 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hun it sounds like ur doing all u can...maybe try and involve ur hubby a bit more, dont be the "bad guy" all the time... it puts alot of strain on u as a person!!
Stress is the worst if u have no-ones support!!
My eldest is 2 and does all the things ur toddler does and she is even a squealer, ie in public she makes me look im murdering her!! lol and all ive said is "come here"
its a phase and im not gonna say what u should say to him as ur his mum and u can choose ur words...
Walking away might just be ur way of dealing with it!! i do it
too and i know it feels bad, but sometimes thats the only way to get the msg across!!
Good luck =)
2006-11-15 16:20:33 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sHEESH.. I feel for you.. cuz people seem to look at you like its your fault.. I HATE THAT.. at that age it seems soo impossible to teach them wrong from right... honestly i suggest constant and the same punishment for it.. take him away from the situation hes in that hes being bad as well... try this aslong as you can.. I cant promise it will work... it may be out of your hands. He could have problems that root deeper.. I dont mean somethings wrong with him.. really.. i just mean alot of kids have agresstion and hyper problems they are born with.. Just remember ... YOUR A GREAT MOM.. !!! Be strong ! he could just grow out of it !
2006-11-15 16:20:49 · answer #7 · answered by pladedah 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My daughter is 14 months old and she hits me and bites me, she doesnt do it to my husband just me and she thinks its funny I tell her no and thats bad but she just laughs, but lately when I tell her no she stops so hopefully its working.
2006-11-17 07:21:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
take away his privalges. Then tell him u will buy him a toy from time to time if he stops.(which ever he wants), trust me it works. But if he gets to roudy, a lil spanking doesnt hurt him frm time to time
2006-11-15 16:19:30 · answer #9 · answered by boyz_inblu3 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Time for a good, old fashioned spanking
2006-11-15 16:20:47 · answer #10 · answered by eastcoastdebra 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋