When a judge orders child visitation, the father does not pick up the kid, how can I get the order enforced ?

Question

The father took me to court for visitation rights after abanding the child for 6 months.He has visitation rights but does not come get the child unless he wants to, and when asked he states he will come get the child when he is ready and any jugde will see it his way.So what do I do?He took me to court I did not take him.I am a single mother of one child who works 6 days a week to support herself and her child the father does not help and prob never will.I can't get child support he's on disability (I've tried) since chldhood (i found out too late)so I can't get that for the child either I don't qualify for any aid.The father has a Master's Degree and won't get a job and he won't obey the court order.Even if he don't help pay for the childs needs I would like a little R&R what can I do to get this court order enforced?Ps I'm not trying to take the child away from him I need him to follow the order I miss work caring for the child on the days he is to have her.He does not work legally

Answer 1

Actually, since he is getting Disability Payments -- he is also getting Payments for the Dependent too --

Here is the kicker -- DO YOU HAVE HIS SSN?

If you have His Social Security Number -- and the Child's -- you can go to the local Social Security Office, and with the Evidence that YOU are the Primary Custodian (and the track that you are MAKING Every time (note the day, time) that he has NEVER taken Visitation) --

THEN ... Talk to the Social Security Agent -- Give them a Copy of the Evidence -- and ASK that you be made the Custodian for the Child's Dependency Allowance!

Then, at the same time, File with your state's Child Support Enforcement Office -- and when you do -- bring a copy of the Visitation Orders, the times that he took and did not take Visitation -- and HAVE them calculate the Child Support BASED on what you now know IS his Disability Payments, the NEW Visitation Percentages (based on his ACTUALS -- and not some stupid posing for the courts), and any other information you have - - like the year, name of University/College, and the Degree itself (if you have a copy) -- and the State's Child Support Enforcement will open up a case (because you already told us that he is NOT working and REFUSING to pay) -- and believe me -- they can recalculate the amount of Child Support based on ALL THIS EVIDENCE!

Answer 2

I wish there was a way to enforce visitation my ex hasn't seen our kids in 8 months but can magically pop up at anytime for his visitation rights. You can take him back to court and explain that he is not following the court order I doubt it would be considered a violation if he doesn't follow through on visitation but the fact that its irregular may cause psychological harm so you can mention that to the court mediator that your worried that his inconsistency will damage the child psychologically. This will force his hand they will either require he be consistent or revoke his rights. As for missing work do to an ex's inconsistency I know how you feel the best way is to set up for a sitter. Also you should qualify for some kind of aid most states offer something...

Answer 3

You cannot get the order enforced because the police cannot force him to come and take the child unless he wants to himself .If it were me,i would not want my child to go with someone who doesn't even want them at the time as this could cause the father to get mad at the child because the child is forced on him.If i were you,i would find daycare for my child and the father would have to work his hours around the child,not just when he wants to.He does not have the best interest of the child involved here,he just wants the child when HE wants and this will be noticed by the child the older he/she gets.Move on with your life and be independant in yourself.Don't set your hours around his because he is not reliable.I am very sorry to hear this and i hope that things get better for you.The judge will put up with his antics so long and if you document everything,when he picks up the child,or not and show it to a judge,this father could lose all rights.I feel for you,i had the same thing happen to me and i chose to not have the father in my daughters life at all,then come in and out of her life every now and then.When she grew older,it was her decision.She visited him once and never went back.Good luck and i will be praying for you and your child.

Answer 4

My court orders state:
Father must pick up my child one day each weekend for 8 weeks, visits for 8 hours.
Then he can pick her up every other weekend Friday-Sunday.
If he fails to follow through I can start over or file for relief from the courts.
If he does not show up. I suggest you do not call. Just write it in a book.
Get a trusted friend or family member to help you with the baby on the weekends hes responsible for her. My oldest daughter is 7 and her dad is still not capable of following the orders set.

Answer 5

He is wrong, if the judge ordered him to have her on certain days, those are the ONLY days he can have her. My advice is stop depending on him, he is a deadbeat. Tell him if he doesn't get her on the days he is supposed to then he doesn't get her at ALL. If you went to court I am assuming you had an attorney. You can call your attorney but they will most likely tell you that the court will not force him to exercise his visitation. You can refuse to let her go if it isn't on one of the ordered days, but no one can force him to see her. I am sorry he is such a jerk, I went thru something similar with my ex husband. He has not seen my son now for over a year and my husband is going to adopt him next month. Good luck. By the way, what were you doing for child care for her before he got visitation?

Answer 6

If he does not WANT to exercise his visitation right he does NOT have to. The court is NOT going to force him to visit his son. The fact that you would like a little R&R is too bad. He's YOUR son. As for working, you'll just have to find a back up babysitter for the times your ex doesn't pick the child up. The court order was actually NOT for him to visit the child but for YOU to allow visitation. If the father doesn't want to visit the child too bad. That's life. HE doesn't have to obey the court order YOU do.

Answer 7

None of you people get it. When two parents go to court what happens is one parent is given the child and the other gets screwed, becomes bitter and angry no longer feeling like a parent. To the victor goes the spoils and the work of raising the child alone. Here is the fix all to divorce court both parents get equal custody, visitation and no need for child support. No one parent has control over the other is it really that hard for you to see this would give you more time to live you life and would make him feel like a parent and not a non-custodial.

Answer 8

Maybe you should look elsewhere for a little R & R. Other trusted friends or family members. Are you sure you want him spending that much time with your child when he has this kind of attitude and is this type of person. Beside many of us with good marriages don't get that type of R & R. The guys still kinda do their own thing and leave us moms to do the majority of the childcare. I have 4 and mine didn't start helping till I had my fourth. He's great now! Good luck

Answer 9

Well unfortunately for us single parents, that do seem to happen. Try this it might hurt you a little,but some kind of way it gets attention. On those times he appear interested do not respond. Nine time out of ten it is not the child they want to visit. As soon as they say oh you don't give me the chance to visit. You reply with a sympathetic answer,did I. I did not mean too. Do an invite for drinks or a meal. Once they are there bam you got them. Being even though you ask the other parent over have a date waited on you on speed dial. Get the picture. Hope this was helpful.

Answer 10

I'm probably going to have this answer removed for being offensive, but this is my opinion.

Why, on God's bountiful earth, would you want to force him to visit this child? Do you really think when the child is in his care that the child is being cared FOR? If he shows this much lack of interest in his own children, I most certainly wouldn't force visitation. Kids will survive living without one parent being prevalent in their life. Will a child survive if placed in the care of an apathetic parent? Why wonder? Don't do it. There are agencies everywhere and all around you who can direct you getting assistance if you need it. Ask your friends at church to please help with childcare....I bet they will when they know the circumstances. Single parenting is very hard. I know. I lost my husband in 1997 on my son's 14th birthday. But I know this because I'm still right here! Good luck and God bless and again, I'm sorry if I sound rude....just answering the question in my opinion!