why do people have low self-esteem?

Question

just want to know

Answer 1

Mine is mainly from my mom being an abusive ***** and telling me over and over what a horrible person I was. Well, still am, by her reckoning. I can still hear her voice in my head--when I have self-defeating thoughts, it's always what she said playing in my head even now.

Low self esteem usually starts with sh!tty family/caregivers. Then, once you've learned how to do it, it maintains itself pretty well. It's really hard to defeat, because w/low self-esteem, I feel like I couldn't change, and if I could, why should I bother?

Total bullsh!t, I know. But that's how it feels. I can trace most of the things I hate about myself back to stuff my mom said and did. So that's where mine came from.

Answer 2

A person who has a low self-esteem has usually had a secluded childhood. One where their parents, siblings, extended family has belittled them. It goes on to school where they are put down, called names, and ignored. The old saying "sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me" is not true. Name calling does hurt a person and if their self-esteem is already weak the name calling will chip away at it.

A child who has been beaten by their parents will also have a low self-esteem. When I did foster care I had many children who had very low self-esteem caused by abuse, abandonment, ridicule, and belittlement. It takes a long time to make a child believe that they did nothing wrong and to build up that self-esteem.

I gave up being a foster parent because I got tired of seeing the state give the child back to the abusive parent that would turn right around and abuse them again. I had 2 children that were sexually abused, 1 that was physically abused, and 1 that was abandoned it is a horrible thing for these children to go through and then for them to think they are worthless just tore my heart out when the state said the parent has done what the state wanted and they could be reunited with the child.

I hope this answered your question.

Answer 3

People with low self-esteem have either been made to feel inadequate over a long period of time or have never positive reinforcement. The solution to either is the same - lots of praise and positive feedback over time and the person will slowly develop self confidence.

Answer 4

They were not taught or shown how to have Self esteem, they had no one who cared about having it. low self esteem is what happens when people are not in a well balanced home or environment. no one cared ..
they had no encouragement growing up...
and it got to be a natural thing as they got older..

Answer 5

here are some ways in wich we have low self-esteem.

Children who were verbally, emotionally, physically, sexually abused

Children who were not loved and accepted unconditionally either at home, at school or in the community

Children of parents or grandchildren of grandparents who came from a codependent or dysfunctional family system

Children of dependent parents (alcohol, drugs, gambling, food, shopping, sex)

Children of workaholic parents

Children of mentally ill parents

Children raised in a high stress environment

Children raised in an environment where feelings were not openly expressed, experienced, or welcome

Children who have experienced the divorce of their parents

Children who have experienced the loss of a parent or significant other in their childhood

Children raised in an absolutist or fundamentalist environment

Children raised in a family headed by a single parent due to divorce, death, or absence due to career

Children who were abused emotionally or verbally in a school environment

Adults who have been hurt badly in a relationship, in marriage, in school, at work, or in the community

Adults who work in a codependent work environment

Adults hurt in a relationship at work or in the community with someone and/or married to someone who is dependent (alcohol, drugs, gambling, food, shopping, sex

Adults in a relationship with someone or married to someone who is a workaholic

In a relationship with someone or married to someone who comes from a codependent family or work system

Members of a family in which a child with a developmental disability is born and reared

Members of a family in which a chronically ill family member is cared for

Members of a family or work environment in which a compulsive individual lives

Compulsive or dependent individuals once they are treated and enter recovery

Answer 6

because people find someone to pick on and they are worse than wild animals, when they know someone is insecure they keep telling them they are stupid, fat, ugly and so on until some people kill themselves, it usually starts with parents or siblings though.

Answer 7

Sometimes their parents criticized them more than they praised them, but there are other causes too.

Answer 8

someone negative forced it upon them with their negative actions and words

Answer 9

because people usually make them that way.

Answer 10

not enough caffeine