It's a little more complicated than this but here is pretty much whats happening now.....
I've been dating my boyfriend for 6 years now...we are on the verge of deciding whether or not to get married...see he is in the military and stationed in Germany....so are plans are to get married and just Fianally be together!
But Now because of our bumpy past he still can't find himself to forget what I've done to him! But its not like he's been perfect either! I love him so much and would love to finally share my life with him...So my question is should I keep on trying to make him see how much I truly care about him or should I just throw in the towel and move forward with my life?
2006-11-15 09:48:27 · 21 answers · asked by Brenda S 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well, its pretty normal that couples fight. even in your case. i think you should try to work it out and if he still doesn't want to make it better you should forget about him but DON'T GIVE UP!!!
there are plenty other fish in the sea and gurl pls if you've been together for 6 years he should see that that's inportant and if he doesn't you should try try pionting it out i mean seriously 6 yezrs, seriously!! lol good luck, hope you pick me for best anwer!
p.s. i looove germany i was born there!!! lol
2006-11-15 10:35:50 · answer #1 · answered by xoxo to joey 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, if he's going to become career military you're going to be away from each other a lot, I know it's more now that your state side. I would say after 6 years of dating, and it sounds like both of you have been unfaithful, I would really think hard about this. If you were unfaithful because you got lonely with out him what happens when he's off for months/year at a time. Will it really change because your married. Wouldn't you rather have a husband that was home every night, some one to listen to your day, help with the kids etc.? Maybe, he's thinking the same thing, he's been unfaithful in the past, would it change because you've taken vows? I can't tell you what to do, just to give you something to think about. If it taken this long just to get marriage on the table, I don't think it sounds like it would really work. Especially since you don't see each other for months at a time and your just dating! Many things will change once your together. Something to think about.
2006-11-15 17:55:05 · answer #2 · answered by Stephie 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
After six years, it's time to fish, cut bait, or get out of the boat. If he's still got cold feet after all that time, and keeps bringing up things you've done to annoy him in the past, getting married isn't going to change any of that. You'll just be able to have bigger and better fights.
Sorry, it sounds like you really want to make a go of it with this guy, but it doesn't sound too promising. If he's stationed in Germany, suggest to him that it would be really romantic for you to fly to Germany and get married there, enjoy Christmas together, and then you can come home and wait for him to get discharge. Or is he career military? In that case, he could start making arrangements for you to join him on base.
But something has to happen pretty quickly, or you are just letting your life drift away with no prospects for the situation to change.
Good luck.
2006-11-15 17:52:27 · answer #3 · answered by old lady 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I think you both need to iron out the wrinkles of your relationship. If neither of you can get passed the past, then there wont be a very bright future at all. Marriage doesnt change the past so, dont assume it can or will be the solution to you relationship problems. If he cant get over something that happened more than 4 years ago... then their are still too many issues to think about marriage.
2006-11-15 17:52:44 · answer #4 · answered by Mia 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
well, 6 years is a long time, and you guys aren't even sure whether or not to get married, then you guys aren't right for eachother, I say you should find someone else, because two people need to know that they certainly want to be married, and there's no second thoughts about marriage. Marriage is a long life commitment, not just a present where you're tired of your spouse and you get divorced, it doesn't work like that. once you're commited you have to stay commited with eachother.
2006-11-15 17:53:46 · answer #5 · answered by superboredom 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
First of all, check your spelling sweetheart. Spelling is very important in this complicated and competitive world. Ok, to answer your question you both need to go separate ways. Cheating on both sides already sounds like a VERY bad start to even consider getting married. Remember divorce lawyers are the only winners in a divorce!
2006-11-15 17:53:58 · answer #6 · answered by lhoy2k6 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
6 years is a long time to waste but if he cant get over the past there will be problems trust me. You should talk to him about how you feel and tell him your not gonna be around much longer if he doesnt get his act together. Give him a chance and if nothing changes then you will have to move on.
2006-11-15 17:51:22 · answer #7 · answered by trsfernandez 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
After 6 yrs you both should know in the back of your mind whether or not you want to spend the rest of your life with the other. If you are having doubts, than he probably isn't the one, you shouldn't have to debate your feelings, it should be concrete
2006-11-15 17:53:23 · answer #8 · answered by joker:P 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If he's unsure now, knowing what he knows, and understanding how you feel, then what makes you think that will change in another year, or two, or six?
Life is what passes us by while we're making plans or waiting for our life to begin. Live your life now, and if he gets on board great, and if not, then move on.
2006-11-15 17:55:06 · answer #9 · answered by sassybree1979 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think since it has taken this long to happen with so much troubles in the past...it would be best for both of you to move on and go your seperate ways now rather than regret the decisions you've made after marriage.
2006-11-15 17:50:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋