His family thinks I should do all the cooking because I'm the female, what should I do?

Question

My boyfriend is Mexican and his family makes fun of him because he always cooks and I never do. My excuse is that it's their house, why should I have to cook? I feel weird, I don't know where their stuff is. He gets annoyed when I can't find a pan or spatula in their kitchen, as if this means that I don't know how to cook. I don't mind cooking for him in my own house but I feel embarrassed because I don't really know what to make for him. I wasn't exactly brought up in a house full of women who are legendary cooks that started teaching me when I was a toddler. Has anybody else had this problem?

Does it make any difference to add that by "his family" I don't mean his parents...? If this were my in-laws' house, I would by all means cook in it since they are the grandparents of our children. My boyfriend is sharing the rent with a bunch of random cousins and aunts and uncles, some of whom I've barely even met. I don't know, the whole kitchen thing just seems awkward to me.

AND I do try to pitch in and make things as much as I can, but sometimes when I don't do something exactly the way they do (this even comes down to cracking eggs) they make fun of me.

Answer 1

YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! When I first stared dating my exhusband, we would go to his family's house and he'd always want me to cook. I don't know about anyone else but I was raised where you don't just go into people's kitchens and start cooking. I couldn't do it. He would get really angry and upset. His family use to look at me crazy because I didn't want to cook, I told them that it's nothing against them, this is the way that I was raised and I don't feel comfortable. They still talked about me but I just let it go. I told him if he wanted me to cook for him everynight, he should get us our own apartment. I told his family if they think I should cook for him everynight because I'm the woman, he should make me his wife so I can do all that domestic stuff and be his HOUSE WIFE, until then, we're just dating and I'm not his mother so he can cook his own damn food!!!!

Answer 2

This is really a catch 22 'The woman cooking is part of the Hispanic culture, if you want to be with this dude you are never going to get away from that.. know matter what you say .. or he says to his parents on your behalf doesn't matter because is this culture the woman cooks and cleans and the Guys bring home the beacon... Hispanic men are very hard workers most of the time.. and you need to be at home hookin of the Comida when the evening comes.. Anyway, it would be alot easier for you if you were not living up in his peoples house.. I know you are probably walkin on egg shells and feeling all self- concious everytime he goes in the kitchen to cook, and his mom or somebody is watchin ... that is a wack to be worried about that all the time.. He is coo with doing the cooking so you guys to figure out the fastest way to get the hell up out of there and into you own $hiT, because nothing is changing otherwise

Answer 3

It won't take you more than 10 minutes to find the pans. Just do it and do your best. People appreciate the loving effort even if the results aren't fantastic. Don't embarrass your boyfriend by being a "typical American" wife who have reputations for never cooking, cleaning or raising her kids. If you make the effort, I'm sure they'll be willing to teach you. Meanwhile, you can get recipes and cookbooks and pick things that sound tasty.

Answer 4

Wipe that scowl off your face and cook for him! Go spend an hour in the kitchen looking around to see where everything is.

I dont believe just because you are a woman you should cook but dont make excuses about doing it either i thought cooking was a way of showing someone you loved them. I really dont know hey maybe things are different here in australia??

Answer 5

I know it is important to keep good relations with his family, but when you come down to it your relationship with your boyfriend is the most important. Ask your boyfriend when you cook for him, is he happy with the meal? Is it eaten? If not then I would take advantage of the Mexican cooks in his house and learn some new recipes. It can only add to your cooking experience. Let them know how you feel and you may be surprised at what they are not thinking and only teasing him.

Answer 6

My family individuals thinks its a lady position. i replaced into "experienced" early in life to be a perfect woman which meant I had to hit upon the thanks to be a competent practice dinner. i fairly didnt concepts a lot because I loved cooking and my family individuals now loves the flaws I make. i understand a guy that likes to practice dinner and he stocks recipes with me each and each and every of the time. He ought to be a chef. he's now the really individual who cooks in his living house and he does not enable every person else contact his issues contained in the kitchen. LOL

Answer 7

Can't honestly say I have but try helping him in the kitchen. Invest in a cook book and surprise him and his family one night with a home-made cassarole. Don't let the "why should I" be your excuse. Ask him where things are in the kitchen or offer to work together on dinner. Remember, you want his family to like you, it makes things easier (think Romeo and Juliet) Be polite. Have fun with it, make holiday foods for them, like bake them a pie one night but don't reveal it until AFTER the dinner you helped him make. then surprise them with a nice pie. that could help.

Answer 8

I don't have to have had the problem , in order to answer your question.Ask yourself how does this make you feel when someone is making fun of you? The answer is: Not good, recognize you are surrounded by inconsiderate and non helpfull humans. You are either a part of the problem or you are part of the solution,there is no getting around it, you are one of the other.I am not speaking about you, I am speaking about them.. Now make the decision, what do you want, to be surrounded by uplifting, encourging and loving humans or not. it's your choice, choose wisely, for this is your life we are talking about.

Answer 9

Well, You shouldn't have to cook in their house thats kinda weird in a way. If he cooks let him cook, ingore the parents and just do what you want to do

Answer 10

no I think you are just using this as an excuse not to cook any one can learn, why do you not ask some one in his family to teach you Problem solved