What is a typical 3 1/2 year olds social skills like?

Question

I have a 3 1/2 year old son who was dianosed as having high functioning autism. I am having a hard time with the school district because they dont "believe" he is autistic. Probably mainly because they dont want to shell out any more funds for his education. His teacher told me that even though he doesnt play with other children he will play alone with them around him. And that at this age typical children are not social anyways. I also have a 5 year old typical daughter and I argued that fact that she had friends at that age, played "with" them, and interacted, and initiated play. She said my daughter was just advanced and that is not normal at all.
So I guess my question is. What is a typical 3 1/2 year old like socially? Or are there any articles that compare a typical child at this age with an asd child? Or anything to that effect that I can show as proof that no, it is not normal to be non social at this age.
Thanks

Answer 1

3 1/2 yr. olds should be social hardly at all with children there age. Your son is too young to be attending school anyway. Children who are put in social environments at this age tend to have social problems later on.

At this age, they need mom and dad the most.

Answer 2

I am having the same sort of problems with my five year old son. He has high functioning autism, also, and, although the school system does believe there is an issue, they say he does not meet their requirements for help. He does not have speech delays, so they will not assist with his daily needs (sensitivity to sounds and change in the routine are the main concerns).

At 3 1/2, we definitely knew that something wasn't right. My son began to have excessive tantrums where he would scream for hours at a time. I thought it was all my fault, that maybe I made him that way. But really, he was just overstimulated. To this day, he doesn't play "with" other children. He plays alongside, like you said. My three and a half year old plays with other children, and has a best friend at school. He does not.

So, I would say that it is not normal for your child to be nonsocial. You as a mother know if something is not "normal." Keep fighting, and good luck! Here's a good asperger website:

www.wrongplanet.net

Answer 3

3 Year Old Social Skills

Answer 4

Boys can be less socially active than girls. He might be a loner and like to play alone (as often autistic child is; maybe because he has to concentrate more on what's he doing so no time to socialize ?). It's ok for a 3-year-old (or any age) to be shy. It's good that he's playing among other children and not hiding. Once he's comfortable he'll start playing with others. He's 3 so he's still learning. Autistic children need a lot more encouragement to be social but don't force him or makes him feel even more self-concious. It'll get better as he grows up and likes more activities (sports, music, art)--then he'll start socialize/join to the groups of his interests.

Answer 5

My 3 1/2 year old girl has at least a dozen friends. She says hi to them every morning when I drop her off at school and when I pick her up in the evening, she tells me all about the games they played together, who had what for a snack and who got sick and threw up at recess. Even my 2 1/2 year old son is starting to play with other kids (interactive play vs parallel play) Look in any child development book Interactive vs Parallel play and you will have all of the facts that you need.

You might want to consider getting a second opinion about your child's autism too. Every child is different and develops at their own rates after all.

Good luck.

Answer 6

I don't know what is "normal" I can only go by how my 3 yr old daughter is... She is very social with other kids..she has no problems playing with them..except for the occasional fight over a toy or something...I have seen her occasionally play by herself in a room full of kids...and she likes to sit and watch movies...but often gets bored easily with them...she can hold a conversation with me for 30 minutes or longer if I'll let her...and I can clearly understand her speech....I'm assuming that this is normal 3 yr old behavior...

Answer 7

My daughter is the same age & tries to play w/ every child she meets, she greets adults (sometimes timid though) she can carry on a LONG conversation. My daughter plays with her friends and often intciates play & has a over active imagionation.
*********************Sorry to hear about your liitle boy,but it should not be that much of a suprise when the rates of boys w/ some form of autism in the US are now 1 in 10!!!!!!