I am currently in a relationship with this great guy that i really love. We have been dating for 9 months and its seem to be getting pretty serious. He has a son and is raising him by himself and I am a single mother aswell with 2 kids. With the holiday coming along we are both deciding what 2 do. He is planning on going out of town, but has not yet asked if we would like to join him for Thanksginving. I would really like for him to spend it with me and my family, but I am not sure how to break it down to him without causing a problem or is it right that we not spend it together and I not make a big deal out of it?
2006-11-15 07:01:35 · 5 answers · asked by Crystal Ball 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Wow...you've got a man who is being a responsible father and raising his son?? Now, that man is a keeper...so don't mess it up by putting pressure on him with plans for the holidays. In fact, don't say a word to him. Let him invite you. And if he doesn't, greet him with a smile when he returns.
2006-11-15 07:23:54 · answer #1 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello:
My take on your question is to allow him to proceed with his plan for the Holiday. You have only been dating for nine months and it sounds as though your relationship has not experienced holidays as of yet. You did not say who he is planning to see or go during the holiday so its possible he is needing this quality time to be with his son and also clear the way for you and yours for the future. You stated that you love him perhaps he is needing the time to sort out where he is at in the relationship. Taking on your love and the love of your daughters is a huge commitment so if it is decided to do so well then enjoy your years to come because unless I am mistaken his actions appear to be that of a responsible person. Happy Holidays!
2006-11-15 15:20:12 · answer #2 · answered by Fresh choice 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A lot of this depends on where he is going and why. If you want him to spend the day with you and the kids all of them just tell him that. Maybe it would be best for you to go with him instead and make it clear that if you do this then you want to spend Christmas with your family.
If your relationship is as serious as you think it is then it is important that you communicate to him your needs and wishes and make sure he understand that you support his needs and wants as well. But mainly be understand and never criticize him just because you may not agree with him.
2006-11-15 15:33:46 · answer #3 · answered by Ruth D T 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends. Do your kids and his kid know each other? Do they even like each other? If the answer to any of that is no, then don't do it.
Although it seems to be serious, 9 months isn't a long time, especially when you have kids to consider too. I'd say that unless your families are that close, just wait till next year.
2006-11-15 15:04:33 · answer #4 · answered by arewethereyet 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try just letting him know that he and his son are more than welcome to spend the holidays with you and your family, but also its no pressure if he choses to spend it with his family...maybe he is waiting for you to open the subject???
2006-11-15 15:10:00 · answer #5 · answered by juanita s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋