I am getting so nervous for my upcoming wedding. The wedding is going to be in February of 2007. I am 28 and this is the first time I have ever been married. I feel like I am losing my independence and just really am nervous about the situation. I love my fiance dearly and have wanted nothing more than to married. We have had some rough patches that have been fixed and are much better however I am just so nervous about actually getting married. Anyone have any advice to help me see what I am getting myself into?
2006-11-15 04:47:57 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
look, everything is going to be fine. you have a 50% chance of getting divorced. if you do, it's no big deal, not the end of the world. people get married and divorced every single day.
as long as you're ready to stop being an individual, and start being half of a pair, you'll be fine. just remember that every decision you make is half his, and every choice he makes is half yours.
chin up, kiddo! (and by the way, don't lie to yourself - if you "wanted nothing more than to be married," you wouldn't be nervous, would you? you don't KNOW if you want to be married, because you've never BEEN married before, so you can't know what it's like. it's natual to be nervous. just relax.)
2006-11-15 05:07:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is entirely normal to be nervous about an upcoming wedding! It is a big deal....because it is going to change your way of life forever. But if you and your fiancee truly love each other and are able to communicate then you should be able to work through this with him. You are not alone in this wedding because he is doing it with you. Are you not ready to make the next step? Do you really believe that he is the one you want to be with for the rest of your life?
Talk over your concerns with him...he may be having jitters as well.
If that doesn't help then talk to people who have been married and find out what they went through prior to the wedding.
Just remember that everyones situation is different.
Getting married and sharing your life with someone is not the end of the world and it is not giving up your independance. It is a time to move forward with someone you care for greatly. The two of you begin a partnership that can be even greater than you alone.
Be careful though when you approach the subject with him just tell him that it is a huge step in your life and you are concerned and wondering if he is feeling the same way.
It is Completely Normal to be Nervous!
2006-11-15 04:55:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you are feeling is very normal. I am getting married on Dec 27th 2006 and I also had wedding jitters. I had mine like in March and was freaked out completely. I couldn't figure out why I was feeling this way. Anyways a few months ago I finally figured it out. I am getting married in India and my fiance is American. I was afraid to face my Indian relatives back home. I didn't want to hear them asking me questions about why i choose to marry an American guy. I talked to my fiance and told him openly and he completely understood what I was going through. I got over it and now I am very excited. From reading your question it seems like you are scared about losing your independence. You have to think hard and see if that is the true reason. You don't really lose any independence. You can do much more when you get married. You experience new things. Wedding,children,buying a house,buying a car etc etc. Its great!Just look forward to the fun things. I have another advice..don't listen to other people. They might tell you its great being single and blah blah but trust me I don't think they like being single.Congratulations and enjoy the wedding!
2006-11-15 05:06:35 · answer #3 · answered by Babe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wedding day jitters, not just normal ... important!
When you think about it your wedding day is unprecedented. You've never done anything like this day before - committing yourself to be with another person come what may. i think it's really important to have an understanding with your husband to be about how you handle difficult moments. Rough patches aren't a problem - really - it's getting over them that is important. My wife and I have been married 30 years next year. She's my best friends. We've had rough patches for sure, but we've learned how to manage them. for example any sentence starting with the words "You always..." is banned! Stuff like that. Big question. Hope this little answer helps
2006-11-15 04:53:55 · answer #4 · answered by crimsonre 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take a deep breath, sit down and relax. You have been through some rough patches while dating and you must realize that there will be rough patches during married times also, but these are placed there to make the relationship stronger. Your getting into the grown up world of marriage and as such have to act more responsibly and share your life (and living space) with another person. Marriage is a wonderful union and I wish you nothing but joy and happiness in your future together.
2006-11-15 04:52:48 · answer #5 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, yes, regular wedding day jitters are normal, but if you're more along the lines of not wanting to do it then it's time you and your fiance sit down and have a little chat. Remember: marriage should not be a loss of your independence...it should be more about 2 whole people coming together. Just talk to your fiance about your fears and decide if this is really what you want or not. You owe it to both of you to be honest with yourself.
2006-11-15 04:51:38 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Wedding Day Jitters,
I would have to say your not the only one who has or will have wedding day jitters. I wasn't nervous about getting married to my husband (I knew he was the one). I was more nervous about if I was going to trip or people weren't having a good time!!!!!!!! After a couple of drinks I relaxed a bit and realized it was our day. We were happy for the people that came to celebrate our new beginning.
2006-11-15 04:57:12 · answer #7 · answered by Derek R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A little bit of nerves is normal because you just want the day to go well and everything to go as planned. If you are absolutely freaking out, that is something to think about and explore the reasons why. I was pretty calm when I got married last year (I was 27 at the time) because I knew I was making the best decision and I felt so good about it. Best wishes!
2006-11-15 05:04:15 · answer #8 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i was nervous off and on for the 2 months or so before my wedding. i would cry and get frustrated. this is totally normal. lean on your bridesmaids and tell them you want tough love. tell them to tell you that anytime you start to feel this way that they are to take you out to coffee and remind you of all the reasons why you are marrying this man. trust me, the ceremony itself goes by sooooooooo fast and then you're taking pictures, having your first dance and then after that you don't even remember that you were nervous in the first place. trust me when i say you are fine and it's normal. i've been married fr 4 months and i had all kinds of crazy feelings. they go away. and on the honeymoon, you just keep thinking of how luck y and happy you are and laugh at yourself when you think about how nervous you were. it will be okay. good luck, have fun!
2006-11-15 04:53:56 · answer #9 · answered by AnneeMoon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Planning a wedding is one of the most stressful things a person can go through (I know, I've been through it). There are a lot of things to take care of that everything else falls to the background. Is your fiance helping out in the planning? Are you talking to him about what needs to be done and figuring out together how to get it done? Most of my stress came from relatives, and once we told them to stop meddling, everything became a little bit easier. Just try to relax and have fun. When the day finally comes, don't stress yourself out about anything and remember that if something doesn't go quite as you planned, you are the only one that will know about it because you are the person that planned it. Congrats to you and your fiance.
2006-11-15 04:54:28 · answer #10 · answered by tipper 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋