why do my quarrels with my girlfriend always involved my best female friend?

Question

well you see i have a best female friend since young, and we always will try to get support from each other and will help each other if we can, and my girl friend know about my best female girl too, but i just don't get it why in our quarrels she can just drag my friend's name in, and i have not been in contact with my female best friend that often as we are currently in different country and she has a boyfriend and is getting marry soon.. what is wrong with my girl friend??

Answer 1

your gf is insecure in the relationship. she has fears that you or more likely that your female friend has a hidden agenda to "steal" you from her. she might even be jealous. this is immature, and quite honestly i wouldn't put up with that from anyone.
my husband has many female friends....i know them, and although i don't know what their intentions MAY BE...i DO know that i trust my husband. and i know where his butt is at night...here with me.
if your faithful, then she has nothing to worry about, and her insecurities are HER issues. you can't fix them for her, only SHE can work through that.

Answer 2

If your girlfriend is not your best female friend, that in itself is enough to keep the argument going for years. The fact that you worded the question in that fashion shows that you do not place the same value on the relationship as she does.

You can discuss things, but do not argue with a woman. When a guy argues, it is about wining the argument because a guy is competitive. You can win the battle and still lose the war. Women want to be heard, they want you to understand their point of view. They do not want you to tell them that they are wrong which in essence is you telling them they have no right to feel or think the way they do. Did the light click on? If you address the argument as an argument, then you lost before you opened your mouth. If you addressed her feelings and insecurities, then you have addressed the heart of the problem.

Answer 3

Sounds like she is jealous of your deep relationship with that friend. That she lacks something that this other person has that so interests you. Maybe she is a little insecure about it.

Maybe you spend too much time either with that friend or talking on the phone.

Ask her some direct questions: Don't accuse her of anything. Just hear her out.
1. Do you not like ______?
2. If yes, why don't you like _________? After her first answer, ask her is there anything else? ____________ (Give her time.)
3. Do you think I spend too much time with ________?
4. If yes, how much time can I spend with her a month, is OK with you?
If she wants you to suspend all contact with _______ that is a little unfair in my book.

If ________ is a former girlfriend or is very hot, your current girlfriend has a right to be uncomfortable if you spend ANY alone time with _______. Just the way gals are wired. Y'can't change that.

Answer 4

jealousy or she may feel you tell the friend more than you do her. Do you talk to the friend about her the gf? It is always rough for a female to accept a best friend that is a female. usually worried that there is something more there than meets the eye.

Answer 5

we can't help out much is thats all u give us, i'll be back in 10 minutes to check if u've added any details that would be helpful in helping u
ok, well that was more then 10 minutes, lol but i see well its just that ur GF might be afraid since you've known ur best femaile friend longer then her and that u might have a stronger bond with ur best friend then with her. it most likelyt bothers her that u have another female thats special to you, even though it might be a different type of special.

Answer 6

Because you're a dummy. She should be your best female friend. Everyone's entitled to their opinion, but I think if you're in a serious committed relationship then you should limit your opposite gender friendships to ones that your partner feels good about. You definately shouldn't be hanging out with your bff behind your girl's back. That's called cheating even if you're not touching her.

Answer 7

because she has doubts that you're having an affair with your best female friend! both of you need to talk about where to draw the line when it comes to meeting friends of the opposite sex.

maybe you said something about your best female friend that disturbed your gf... :)

Answer 8

Dunno. Jealousy or insecurity may explain it.

Sounds to me your question is not "Why" but "How to not".

Well, best answer I can give to dat is sit down and have a good chat with your beloved during one of her better moods.

Answer 9

Jealousy. sorry to say but most of the time its jealousy.

Answer 10

jealousy rears its ugly head.