she doenst want to talk about any of her personal problems, but she wants me to gain her trust. if we do start talking about her personal problems, should i give her my advice, or just confort her?
2006-11-14 16:53:09 · 20 answers · asked by Robert Z 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
if she wants you to know,she will tell you.you know we all have skeltons in out closets.maybe she likes to forget about the bad times.well if she brings it up and ask you what you think,then you should tell her,but be nice about it.just dont go digging into her past and telling everyone you meet,thats between you and her,and not anyones elses business.
2006-11-14 17:02:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Aww thats so sweet!! But dont let the physical things get in the way in which of you speaking to her. I mean your already going to prom with her so your going to ought to speak to her about plans and such and maybe doing that would help you with talking to her most likely. Simply try to be more informal and if you cant then ask her if which you can speak to her and ask her if she's sure that she wishes to head with you to promenade and ask her if anything is bothering her about you primarily to look if she perhaps scared or simply has some insecurities. But be alittle laid back when your speaking to her too like are trying not to believe about her as the woman you rather like and you need to get to know her, on the grounds that should you cant talk to her as anybody general lol you then would not be competent too due to the fact that shes anyone you particularly like. Im definite she perhaps shy as you but anyone has to take initiation right here and just pop out and say some thing before its an ungainly promenade.
2016-08-09 22:37:12 · answer #2 · answered by lacie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The most important thing you can do is LISTEN. Really, like be attentive, but DON'T SAY A WORD, until she stops talking. You have to look at her while she's talking, but she dosn't really want you to voice an opinion or even say that everything will be okay. The smartest thing to say, is 'how do you feel about that', and when she comes up with a way to fix the problem, you can say 'that's a good way do it'. Make sure that you never interupt her when she's confiding in you.
2006-11-14 16:59:29 · answer #3 · answered by Sarah 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If a girl has been hurt previous to the relationship, yes it is going to be very difficult to gain her trust. When she tells you stories I believe you should give her advice to an extent and also comfort her. If she starts getting mad when you are giving her advice nicely back off and realize that it must be a real sensitive subject.
2006-11-14 16:58:48 · answer #4 · answered by monikp5836 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's best usually just to listen and be supportive. Just be friendly and don't try to push anything. You can't fix her problems, but you can point her in the right direction at times. You can earn trust by being open and honest about yourself. Perhaps she could commiserate with some of your struggles?
2006-11-14 16:56:09 · answer #5 · answered by dantheman_028 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since she isn't talking yet, you could improve on your 'manerisms' show that you are really willing to lend a listening ear and that nobody matters more than she does. E.g. send her a sms when she least expects it to ask how are you and stuff like that. Pay extra attention to her when she talks.
It's also very important to show her how you treat other people. Do you speak ill of others in front of her? Do you spill other people's secrets to her? Don't
If you do start talking, just listen attentively. be reassuring. and be natural. play by ear. adivce or comfort... both are good but just play by ear
2006-11-14 17:17:59 · answer #6 · answered by Gem 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't confront her, oh no, no way. That's not the way it works. You should listen to her, of course encourage her when you feel she needs that, show your sympathy and give advice only in case she asks for it. Don't be annoying, don't ask about her problems, she will come herself to talk about them. Time will pass and you will see how things will change :-)
2006-11-14 16:59:55 · answer #7 · answered by Salita 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She probably DOESN'T want advice. IF you can get her to talk about her problems, be comforting and supportive if you really care about her. Make it all about her and her feelings. That should make her more at ease and maybe even open up more. Good luck!!!
2006-11-14 16:56:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
To gain someone's trust, you must earn it. You do this with the way you lead your life...when you say you are going to do something...you do it. One of the main reasons I broke up with my boyfriend is because he didn't keep to his word...he said what he needed to, to get through the moment. He thought, "no big deal." I thought,"big deal."
2006-11-14 16:56:36 · answer #9 · answered by I am Sunshine 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ask her what she wants. Is she asking for advice or venting? Say how you would feel in that situation, connect with her. put yourself in her shoes, it's about relating. R e l a t i o n ship.
2006-11-14 16:55:49 · answer #10 · answered by mati 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋