Have you as a parent ever just washed your hands of your children?

Question

Ha ve you as a parent ever just washed your hands of your children?
My mom did when I was 18 except for every once in awhile it stayed like that for over 20 years just because I moved out and took my son with me. i was over 18 and she didn't agree with me leaving. She hardly ever saw my kids until they were grown. Please never totally disown your kids they did not ask to be brought into this world. My 28 year old was a handful all her life and we had many arguments resulting in awful things said by us both but she always knew I was here for her no matter what. 11 months ago she was murdered by her BF her and I had augued the day before which sometimes resulted in our not speaking for awhile but because I knew she was upset with her BF I went to visit her and tell her I loved her around 8 hours later she was dead. I say this to spare any parent the anguish of letting the last words be angry ones. Trust me if you lose a child it is horrible no matter but if your last words were in anger well all I can say is I proably wouldn't be able to live with myself

Answer 1

everyone has washed their hands of me...and im not bad...i want to go back to school, go to church, help people, that kind of thing...

Answer 2

I am so very sorry for the loss of your daughter - what a heart breaking story. Thank you for sharing this because there was a time when I wanted to wash my hands of my three sons. But you are right, in that as parents, we should not let our last words be angry ones. It is just not worth it. If our kids stray down a path we disagree with or do things that go against our grain, we have to accept it and let them live their lives and just keep on loving them.

God bless you.

Answer 3

As a mother of three children, to which 3 years ago my oldest who was 40 at the time died of cancer. My heart and prayers go out to you. I found that I can't dwell on the past, it hurts too much Your right no one knows how it feels until it happens to you. Have faith in God, and he will see you through this. as for your question, I could never understand why any mother could disown there own child. But there are times when many parents tell there children to get out of there house, because they just can't take it anymore. We don't know what goes on in other peoples houses. But at the same time, be there for them and let them know you still love them, I was fortunate, I got to care for my daughter until the end, I consider that a blessing.

Answer 4

I gave birth to them and I shall always be mom, they are my responsibility no matter how old i get I will never wash my hands of them no matter how old they get they will always be my kids. I am responsible for everything they do cause I brought them into this world. And I need to make them responsible and a credit to the human race.

Answer 5

It was good you were able to speak with your daughter before she died. And as you said, she always knew you were there for her. No doubt she loved you equally as much. There is no remedy, except for time perhaps, to ease the pain of losing a child, no matter their age. As parents we can only raise them, love them and be there for them. It sounds as if you did everything right. I'm sure your heart is hurting badly now, and it will forever be missing a piece, yet I know your story can be used to help other parents out there who make the worst mistake of all and that is shutting out their kids. God bless you for sharing your story. Please don't ever stop sharing. I wish for you good things ahead my dear.

Answer 6

God bless you for going back to say your "sorry". That probably made her feel so good. Your a good dad for doing that. More people need to realize how precious time is in their lives. Family is so important, it's our "roots" to our soul. It's who we are, we should leave no time for feuding and being revengeful. No-one actually comes ahead. Peace to you!

Answer 7

I am so sorry for your loss.