What is the best way to show empathy and support for loved ones in hard times (please read on)?

Question

My in-laws have been going through some serious crap lately... my father in law lost his father a couple months ago, now he is laid off from work, and just now his mother has gotten very sick and may have a terminal disease; this was all unexpected. My mother in law's mother has been sick and is now getting worse.

I get along with my in-laws better than I do my own parents. We havent always been close but now we all love each other.

I want to help them in this difficult time. We have no money to ease the financial burden on them; I have been through losses, but I was much younger then; so I dont know what I should do or say now as an adult. How can I be supportive and understanding? What can I possibly say? I feel awful because I'm so powerless to be of any real help. Especially with regards to my husband's 2 grandmothers... they may not have long and its so hard when you know they could go any day. How can I be more supportive? Thanks in advance.

Answer 1

I think the best thing you can do is let them know you love them and care. Sometimes showing up with a home-cooked meal or doing some other act of kindness means more than any financial help could. I would let them know that you really want to be there for them and are willing to help in any way you can. Calling to check on them can show empathy as can sending random greeting cards throughout the next few weeks that express appropriate sentiment. Be attentive to them, offer to take away some of the mundane burdens of life when you can and otherwise just be there to listen if they need to talk and keep reminding them how much you love them.

Answer 2

Great question already shows empathy. I would go over and help clean house or run errands, be a shoulder of compassion in case your mother in law wants to talk. Tell them how much you appreciate them and you are here anytime they need it.
Sometimes you just can do thoughtful things that back up what you are trying to say. A bouquet of flowers don't have to cost a lot, or baking their favorite cookies and dropping them off with a card that says I love you.
Let your husband go with you and spend time with Dad perhaps in the garage or fishing and be there with the mother in law and spend quality time.
They sound like they are lucky to have you. Good luck, I wish you all well!

Answer 3

Give hugs if they are huggers. Tell them you love them. Tell them you are here for them and want to help if you can. Visit the grandparents, encourage your inlaws to take breaks to refresh themselves and take over helping with the grandparents, even one evening a week or something. Just listen, it may not be noticable at the time but they'll appreciate being able to vent and cry and talk it all out to a kind ear. Call often to just say you wanted to let them know you were thinking of them and wondering how they are. Ask if you can run errands for them, or tidy the house, or any sort of those normal little things that become a huge chore to cope with when caring for sick loved ones. Most of all, pray. Ask God to take this situation from your family and He will look after it.

Answer 4

I AM SO SORRY FOR YOUR TROUBLE.empathy,wow you have an old spirit.! love prayers and quality time trust in GGGGOd do whatever is needed for all those involved. takecare not to drain yourself sometimes silent smiles or a gentle touch can be a big help trust in GOD.i will keep your family in prayer GOD bless

Answer 5

you are doing all the rite things, that is all you can do is be there for them in this very hard time. just continue to listen and to offer you support, i know this is hard but just stay strong for them. life is just not fair, but we have to deal with the cards we are dealt.
the best of luck to all of you. god bless.

Answer 6

take e and cry with them and talk out a plan to change their lives to better accomodate these issues.