Stuck between friend and boyfriend... help!??

Question

I started dating my b/f about 2 months ago and I am happy with our relationship. I also have a good friend (also an ex b/f) who is having a ruff time with his life. He broke up with his girlfriend about a week ago and I am the only true friend he really has. I have no problem in being there for him but I had my best friend ask him about me and he told her, he wants to date me agian but my boyfriend, Alan, is in the way. I dont want to stop being friends with him because we have always had a well grounded friendship. But everyone tells me I need to quit talking to him because he is more concentratred on getting close to me. I dont want anything to come in between, alan and I's relationship but i also dont want to let down my duty as a friend. I promised my friend i would be there but its seems as if its either him or my boyfriend. It bothers alan but he tells me its ok if I want to talk to him... and I kno he is lying.... What should I do?? I jus need some friendly advice please?

Answer 1

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/2006/06/sayit.html


this quick song will lower your stress trust me!

Answer 2

chub: This guy, Alan is on the way of being replaced by a former b/f who was dumped (broke up) by his girlfriend - right? Why should Alan get dumped because of the ex, problem child can't cut it with any girl, outside of you? If you were my g/f, you would get a real "blast" from me ! Guess what? ... YOU are the one who is going to carry the bad repetition for being so fickle. You even, get to have all your ex's "ruff time with his life" problems too - a package deal !!! Have fun - you won't be laughing later on though !!!

Answer 3

I would just tell your X that you value your friendship with him and that you also value your relationship with ALAN and that the only thing that you have to offer to him is friendship at this time. If he cares about you as much as he says then he stand beside you as long as you are happy! If he still wants to interfere with your relationship w/ Alan then you will have to tell him that you can't be his friend anymore! I hope that everything goes well for you!

Answer 4

Be straight up with your ex...tell him flat out that you want to be his friend, and support him, but the two of you dating isn't in the cards and he needs to put that out of his mind or you won't be able to spend time with him anymore. Make it clear you are a platonic friend only and if he desires more, then you will have to cease communication.

Assure your current boyfriend nothing untoward is or will occur with you and the ex, and make sure he knows how much you appreciate him being kewl about y'alls relationship. A lot of people (guys and gals) wouldn't be keep on their sweetie still spending time with an ex.

Answer 5

Sounds to me like your friend is going through a transitional phase. He is emotionally attaching himself to you to get over the feelings of loss. He probably isn't even aware of it. Be patient, supportive but firm in the facts. Talk to him and try to assure him that he's only tranferring his romantic feelings onto you because you two are close friends. He'll get over it when he finds someone else that attracts him. And be completely honest with your boyfriend about your intentions toward the friend. He won't worry about it if you are open about your feelings. If he doesn't feel insecure, he won't be bothered by your friendship.

Answer 6

Ur boyfriend could understand that u have an extremely sturdy relationship with ur chum. Ur chum has saved his distance and thats sturdy it exhibits he does not prefer to wreck ur relationship. attempt and simplicity them right into a verbal substitute perhaps. Ur bf is probable jelous with the aid of fact he does not prefer to lose u attempt and make him understand that u and your are merely pals .

Answer 7

be honest with your ex and tell him you feel the two of you are better off as friends and you really love your current boyfriend alot and your not looking to end that relationship anytime soon.