I have a family member whom I stopped socializing or dealing with all together.She is my cousin.In the past,she had done and said ugly things to hurt me.Me being the person Iam I'm not good at expressing my feelings to others,so one day I decided to ignore her phone calls and ever since then we haven't talked.It's been 3 months,and I didn't exactly tell her why we are not talking.So she doesn't know I sort of have a grudge.
I feel kind of feel bad that I haven't given her an explanation and stopped callin her all of a sudden, but at the same time I don't won't to deal with her.I don't have time for ppl who do not appreciate me 4 me and is going to criticize me,right in my face, for the way I live.
As i said im not the type to pour my heart out to ppl or in otha words express myself.I feel weird.
She is family and I can't avoid her forever......
Help me please ...Im so confused!!!!!!!!!! =-( thnx
2006-11-14 12:15:06 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Not to worry,cause for real for real if she cared so much about your feelings she would've never said or done mean things to you.If she ever ask's you what the hell is going on just tell her,family don't do family like that.I would keep it strictly family respect(Hi,how are you,etc)and thats it.You over their worrying about her,do you really think she's thinking about you???Seriously!!! I hope you are not offened by what I said. Goodluck
2006-11-14 12:34:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you haven't spoken to her for three months, it appears you're well under way to getting this problem solved. If she needs an explanation from you, she is perfectly capable of asking for one. At that time, you can calmly explain that it seems like every time you have contact with her, it goes very badly for you, leaving you feeling bad. You might have to be specific about at least one thing she said. In that case, do your best to give an exact quote, but don't exagerate the tone. In the meantime, do your best to put it out of your mind. ALL of us have troubles with family members, so talk it over with your friends. They should have some helpful suggestions on dealing with her and coping with the problem. Finally, don't let this one person define your life. Find a way to laugh.
2006-11-14 12:24:09 · answer #2 · answered by robertspraguejr 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might not be friendly with her, but like you said, she is still family. Send her a letter now and then in the mail on some nice stationery. That way she cant verbally abuse you immediately on the phone. Send her a christmas card etc., and when you do see her, be polite and show repsect. If she does say mean things, dont take it to heart, just get over it, and dont lash out back at her. Be tactful, and be stronger than her. These are just some suggestions. Hope they help.
2006-11-14 12:20:33 · answer #3 · answered by ~~0o0~~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been in this situation before myself. I love to hold everything in and its a bad thing for me being so young. Well i keep a book of everything that happens and my feelings. I have even written poems and stuff in it. I would suggest you try that so you don't feel so bad. Then eventually you will decide i want her to know but dont know how to talk with her. I personally would write a letter and mail it to her. Tell her what she has done wrong and how you don't like or appriciate what she has done. Then tell her in writting how if she can't change the way she acts you dont want her involved in your life. This would be easier than talking to her face to face or calling her.
2006-11-14 12:21:12 · answer #4 · answered by shawnna 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think just for the sake that she is family and you know that you can't avoid her forever maybe you should tell her whats going on since you feel bothered by it . If you feel like u want to have a relationship with her again then open your mouth if not continue doin you and live your life drama free.You don't owe her no kind of explanation.
2006-11-14 12:32:04 · answer #5 · answered by robin97 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have family members who i do not talk to. Funny how when it's family we think we have to talk to someone we would otherwise not look at twice on the street if they treated us this way or that way. Their is no room in my life for people no matter who they are that treat me or my children badly. And you shouldnt think just because she is family you should take her mess. Because the truth is you dont.
2006-11-14 12:21:23 · answer #6 · answered by killinshel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems you're just as unhappy now. You need to just air this and be done. Call your cousin. Let her know what's up. If she's mad, you've got what you wanted. You won't see her anymore. If she listens, maybe you can start fresh.
2006-11-14 12:42:31 · answer #7 · answered by moley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you find it had to tell her why you quit talking to her face to face or on the phone- well then write her a letter because its seams you expressed your fellings fine here on yahoo answers
2006-11-14 12:22:02 · answer #8 · answered by land057 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honestly i think u need to call your cousin and tell her what the problem is...and if your cousin is still being mean or whatever then they will understand why you are not talking to them
2006-11-14 12:17:38 · answer #9 · answered by lemes03 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you don;t have to tell her anything just go on with your life let her get over it even if she is family
2006-11-14 12:18:25 · answer #10 · answered by mikey200371671 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋