Should i pay rent if i move in with my Boyfriend?

Question

My Boyfriend and i met only a few weeks ago but my finances are tight, he suggested i could save money if i moved in with him to his town house. He would ask me for $50-$70 per week, right now where i live, i pay $110.

He said the difference could go towards paying off my credit card. My question is, would you expect him to charge rent to me, when he OWNS the home?? I was surprised. I'm not going to move in because i think we should go slower and not rush the relationship. Im worried about whether he is a miser with money, he was telling me about how he writes to companies when he is unhappy with their products and recently sent a dishwashing soap back to the company because something was wrong with it? It is a harmless quirk but what do you think??

FYI, I am a full time student, the rent is a weekly amount, not monthly and he is a lovely man and im a nice person not a gold digger.

Answer 1

Does he actually own the home and owe nothing on it? That's pretty unusual. Even if he does, he still needs to pay taxes and utilities. Of course you have to contribute. However, you have only known him a few weeks, so if it were me, I would stay put.

Answer 2

I agree, you should be moving slower, but at the same time, his bills are going to be going up by having another person living in the house. Water, electricity, gas etc are not cheap, and will increase as more people are living in a home. But I say, wait to move in with him...you should at least get to know the guy before hand so that other "quirks" don't show up, and you have no where to go.

Answer 3

Ugh. Well, if you did move in, I would consider the monthly "rent" as either a contribution to the mortgage payment or to help pay for the utilities. I most assuredly would pay something but I think that your instincts are correct to avoid the cohabitation at this time. He may think that he is doing the company or his fellow consumers a favor by alerting the dishwashing soap manufacturers to a suspected defect -- it may not necessarily be about the $2.79 he paid for the Dawn. You will be able to tell if he's over-miserly in time.

Answer 4

GO WITH YOUR INSTINCTS! If your gut says "this is too fast" then its too fast! Its unbelievable how much trouble we cause ourselves in our teens/early twenties by trying to act "sophisticated and mature" and then ignoring that we have perfectly fine working instincts on people. So. Your instincts say "he's trying to take advantage of me" and "this is too fast". Trust those instincts.

Living together adds a messy compllication, and if you're balking at sharing the living expenses I'm going to hazard a guess you've got other issues between the two of you that aren't ready for a shared living arrangement either. You've only known each other a few weeks, and in the range of a lifetime that's nothing, no matter how deep and instant the connection. I'd suggest he find another roommate, preferably one of his own gender. If you also need to cut expenses, why not find someone to share an apartment/townhouse with whom you are not involved in a romantic relationship? This will give your romance time & room to grow on its own, without any of these nasty complications.

Best wishes! Please let us know what you decide!

Answer 5

He may -own- the home, but he still pays a mortgage and other expenses which another occupant in the home would add to. It's probably a good idea however -not- to move in just yet. As for the scam artist in him, that's an interesting quirk there. That's not exactly something to be proud of unless there are actual, genuine complaints that need to be brought into the open for the good of all that may use said products.

Answer 6

Well, moving in with a significant other is a major decision. My husband and I moved in together when we were dating and had been together for about a year. It was a huge change, let me tell you! It is very hard to live with someone, so make sure that you want to be with this guy before making this decision.

Also, you should be expected to pay for some rent or maybe help out with grocerys. He is helping you get on your feet, not helping you pay off YOUR debt. If this seems unreasonable to you, then you shouldn't be moving in with him because it will set the stage for arguments in the future.

Answer 7

First why do you feel that you should not pay rent. If you are a responsible person then it would only be natural that you would want to pay your own way, do you plan on being a kept woman for all your life. remember he who pays the bills rules, so if you pay your share you have a say. And you boy friend is the type of person that will not except shoddy goods or work so be warned

Answer 8

That would be a little soon. I don't think he is asking too much though $ 50 -$70 and he is paying for everything else. When other people live in a house ALL other bills tend to go up. Water , electric, gas, etc. If you were married you would certainly share expenses.

Answer 9

My landlord owns my apartment building but he charges me rent. What does your boyfriend owning his home have to do with his charging you rent.

You want things to go slow, well they are. He isn't asking you to move in with him, he's suggesting that you move into his place so that you can save some money on rent.

And why do you care what he does with his money? It's his money, not yours. Unless that's what you're interested in. Is it?

Edit: As to your additional details: Big deal that you're a student. How is that relevant? It has nothing to do with the money, unless you think he should be doing you more of a favour by not charging you any rent at all. But you said you weren't going to move in anyway, so how could it?

You come off as an all or nothing female. I don't doubt that he's a lovely man. I do doubt the rest of it, however. And you don't have to be a gold digger to be panning for gold. They're two different things.

BTW It's interesting when a girl/woman says that they aren't interested in money or a guy's money, but money ends up being at the center of their conversations.

Answer 10

When 2 or more responsible adults live together and they both work yes they should share the expenses, what just because your his girlfriend that should exclude you from responsibility? By not paying rent you are in fact learning the opposite and looks like your only in it for the free ride.