Giving son/daughter to sibling for adoption?

Question

I am about 5 months pregnant now, and I'm 19. I never really pictured myself with a kid for another 10 years or so, cause i have a lotta things i wanted to do. theres no father. My 24 yr old married sis wants to adopt my baby when its born. She already has one 3 year girl, and i think shes done a very good job of raising her so far. Im not such a big fan of my bro-in-law...he kinda scares me sometimes, but overall decent i think.

Question is, does anybody have any advice (first hand knowledge appreciated) about how difficult it would be on my part and on my sis and bro-in-law if they were to adopt my son/daughter??

Answer 1

Coming from someone who cannot have any children, I just wanted to say that if one of my sister's or my brother's wife was pregnant and asked my wife and I if we wanted to adopt the baby, I would be overwhelmed with joy! My wife and I have been married for 10 years and after 10 years of trying to have a baby, my wife had to have a hysterectomy this past March. I guess in my own selfish desire I wouldn't skip a heartbeat to accept the offer of one of my siblings giving us their baby. But the question remains; is this what YOU really want? I think that you need to think long and hard before you make this decision. I know several people who thouht they didn't want any children or had a child before they thought they were ready to have one. Each one of them kept their baby and survived. All though they had some rough times in the beginning, over the years they endured. If asked today if they had it to do all over again, would they have given their baby away? Every one of them said "NO!" Again, coming from someone who cannot have any children, I would say you need to really think about your options before you make a decision. I'm sure your family would support your decision either way and they would make a wonderful support group if you kept your baby. Just a thought: Giving your baby to your sister would definitely mean you would see your baby grow up and be a part of his/her life, but do this freely without any guilt because it could lead to complications with your relationship to your sister if you have and doubts or regrets. My wife and I almost adopted a baby from this girl we knew, but she changed her mind because we lived in the same town as she did and she felt that even living in the same town would be too much for her to handle.

I pray that you think long and hard about your decision. I hope everything works out, no matter what you decide.

Answer 2

While I have never given a child up for adoption, I have been trying to adopt for 4 yrs and all the birth mothers that I have dealt with found it very hard. I think you should reconsider if you fear your brother in law. However if you are sure that is what you want, I think if you want to have a relationship with your child that would be a good way. my husband and I want an open adoption with our future child's birth mother so she can always know how her baby is doing. I don't know if it would be easier or harder to have your sibling raising your baby. Best of luck to you and if you need someone to talk to, I counsel young women in your situation every day. I don't try pushing people in one direction or another. My screen name is angels_among_us7777 Good luck!

Answer 3

I would suggest letting your sister adopt the baby. Think about it. The baby will be in a good home and since the mother is your sister, you won't be separated from it.
20/20 once did a segment where a teen gave her biological mother, the teen was adopted, her baby so she could pursue her life. despite a little confussion, she feels it was the best decision she ever made. She si still pursueing her life and she's not separated from the baby.

Answer 4

i'm so sorry this surpassed off to you. Myst and Cheerio gave you some stunning solutions. Open adoption isn't enforceable. and you already understand that adoption isn't an uncomplicated subject to do. There are helps obtainable available that can assist you get on your feet, and be sure which you end your education. kinfolk is mostly a competent help gadget for you good now, acquaintances to boot. i've got confidence the ought to declare something with reference to the fiance. it form of sounds like his concerns approximately how he could sense with reference to the toddler are taking part in into your determination. have you ever considered that in case you do relinquish, you ought to have some no longer so friendly thoughts in direction of him for this reason, and finally end up having courting matters in any case? Your thoughts approximately your toddler are what ought to count good now. i think of a few people have additionally very pointedly verified that they are somewhat prepared to predate on somebody in a susceptible state to get somewhat one. I prefer you properly.

Answer 5

girl i was like you i never picture my self having kids too i got pregnant too. guess what this is what i did i told my mom if she can get custarie of the baby and she did and to give me her back when I'm ready to be a mom. trust me you don't want to give her up just like that now my daughter is 2 and she knows who her mom.and i love my baby .girl when your baby is boring if you really don't want it i can raise your baby with my boyfriend and treat her like she's mine but that's up to you . by the way my name is Yesenia r. I'm 20 years old my boyfriend is 26 years old .

Answer 6

its going to be really had to give up ur baby when u look in its eyes then u are going to fall in love with the baby

Answer 7

All that mattres is what is best for the child

Answer 8

i think you should keep her because what if god just give u one chance...