Would you cave in and see her everytime, or would you put your foot down and insist that they take some initiative to sober up and come visit the rest of the family.
2006-11-14 09:08:50 · 7 answers · asked by Karrien Sim Peters 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You must be in such a difficult position! I think you have to set your boundaries. If your mother can't respect them then it is her loss.
I guess you have to judge on how important her role is in your family. Does everyone enjoy seeing her? Is it pleasurable? I've had many alcoholics in my family and honestly, sometimes it was brutal having them around.
Don't let guilt force you into submission. Set your boundaries, make them clear, let your mother know you love her, but need her to meet you 1/2 way if she wants to be part of your life.
Good luck to you!
2006-11-14 09:13:20 · answer #1 · answered by lolabellaquin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If a mother can't stay sober enough to see her family, she doesn't deserve to! Put your foot down. If she doesn't get visits, and calls, tell her that she isn't making an effort. There needs to be a mutual want for each other! Tell her she needs to get help and sober up she wants to see anyone else.
Good luck
2006-11-14 17:27:38 · answer #2 · answered by Meera K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to decide, are you better with her or without her. If you decide that you do not want to see her unless she is sober, you need to tell her that in no uncertain terms and then stick with it. I had to go through this with my Dad. Although I loved him very much I told him it was either booze or me, and I stuck with it. If he came around drinking, I would tell him to leave and come back sober. He finally started showing up sober and I really enjoyed him. He lived with me in his final days and I took care of him until he died from cancer. Some times the most difficult decisions are the best ones. Good luck and I will keep you in my prayers!
2006-11-14 17:23:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anna C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mother has an illness and what's proper behavior is not on her radar.
Try to see her when she's sober and other than that leave her alone.
It may be a good idea to check out Al-Anon to help you deal with this better....good luck
2006-11-14 17:31:40 · answer #4 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Put your foot down!!! End of story!
2006-11-14 17:12:05 · answer #5 · answered by Heather 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Refuse to go see her and tell her she's not welcome in your home as long as she's drinking. If she doesn't stop then write her off as much as you can. You can't help someone by bowing down to their needs.
2006-11-14 17:11:16 · answer #6 · answered by Pache 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
intervention time
2006-11-14 18:15:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋