Well my sister died three years ago and my Mother is still acting like it happened yesterday. I hooked her up with a counsler and everything last year and it doesnt seem to be working. She wont leave her house. She goes to the doctor and gets pain medication that she says she needs for her "back". Well I had a very imporant court date about 2 months ago and of course what does she do, takes all her pain pills at once, after I told her not to do it. Well she was so high on meds that she couldt even hold her head up. Not to mention that fact that she almost overdosed last summer cause she had double dosed herself by "accident". Well she was lucky I was there that weekend or her husband would of came home and found her dead. Well now I live 3 hours away from her and when I call to try to talk to her she is so messed up that I cant even understand what she is saying. Well Im sick of talking to her about this. She takes 5 differnt pills! Enough to knock out a horse.
2006-11-14 08:28:04 · 3 answers · asked by Loca 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
She used to be an outgoing person, a cool Mom. A Grandmother, but all she does now is sit around high and feel sorry for herself. Or she gets high and crys about my sister. It bothers me too, but I havet to move on. You cant change the past. What else can I do? I have been dealing with this for 3 years now. I feel like i dont have my Mother. I feel like the parent now. WHAT ELSE CAN I DO? WHAT?
2006-11-14 08:30:24 · update #1
It might take some tough love. Unfortunately many people in her situation develop a sort of addiction to the attention her problems and suffering attract. Unless you can find a way to break the pattern, they will continue to use their situation to try and manipulate everyone around them.
You should consider taking a tough love stance with her and tell her she has to get her life together if she wants you to have a normal relationship with you. Refuse to be manipulated and allow her to create crisis after crisis to which she wants you to respond.
I can only make some educated guesses for you, so just take it as some things for you to consider.
2006-11-14 09:38:49 · answer #1 · answered by Zee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said your mom is a grandmother too? Can you talk to her about how she's throwing away this valuable relationship because of focussing on the past? I understand she is distraught over losing your sister (who wouldn't be?!) but she needs to move on and take care of herself, for the ones who are still living. Could you talk to the therapist you referred her to? Or her doctor who is prescribing her pain meds?
2006-11-14 17:06:58 · answer #2 · answered by Deborah C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might consider putting her into rehab, as it sounds like she does have a substance abuse problem. There they can also deal with the issues that led her to use in the first place. She needs help RIGHT NOW. Don't wait.
2006-11-14 16:48:31 · answer #3 · answered by Christabelle 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋