My boyfriend of 3yrs has been extremely depressed lately because he can't find a job and due to the circumstances that he's under people are going to be very hesitant on hiring him . He keeps telling me that he doesn't deserve a girl like me and that he was going to isolate his self from everyone;including me. I keep trying to get him to see that it's truly the little things that matter to me and not so much as him giving me everthing that I want. I also keep trying to get him to see that if he isolated hisself from everyone then that really won't accomplish anything. I want him to have his space but at the same time I don't want him to feel as if I don't care and that I am not going to be there for him. What more can I say to him and do for him that will make him feel better about himself? I've told him a million and one times that I am here for him 100% and that I would always be by his side regardless of what happens but what more can I do besides telling him how I feel?
2006-11-14 08:18:39 · 4 answers · asked by tcgagirl18 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He sounds like a real loser w/ a lot of baggage.
DUMP HIM
2006-11-14 08:22:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Keep on doing exactly what you are doing. He is understandably depressed right now. do your best to cheer him on and be ther efor him. Encourage him to not give up. Compliment him on his good traits regularly. Do all the things you would want someone to do for you if the situation were yours to deal with. Talk to friends and family and see if they know of any jobs for him. He needs to feel useful again. If you feel it might help, talk to your family Dr, and maybe schedule an appt for your sweetie to get some meds to keep his spirits up. There is nothing wrong with getting some help for emotional issues. Not at all.
2006-11-14 08:24:22 · answer #2 · answered by nottashygirl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not about your relationship anymore, it is about him and his depression. The best thing you can do is convince him to get into counseling and possibly on meds. He obviously doesn't feel good about himself and it is affecting you. Back off and take care of yourself. Be there for him if he asks for it, but nothing you can say or do will "make him feel better about himself" because he believes he doesn't deserve you, and so when you are so willing to do anything for him it's going to make him feel even worse.
Here's a couple sites to start your research, good luck...
http://www.healthyplace.com/Communities/Depression/living/ifyouknow.htm
http://www.depression.com/help_someone_you_love.html
http://www.concernedcounseling.com/Communities/depression/related/support.asp
2006-11-14 08:34:03 · answer #3 · answered by zmj 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to grant him this only wish. You've told him you're there for him. Now let him see what he can do on his own. It's a macho thing that only he can conquer...but he can't do it with you constantly offering to help him.
2006-11-14 08:24:01 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋