I am an Asian girl, dating a Black guy. He’s a very wonderful guy! I have known him for a year and a half now. Even though, we don’t consider having a commitment, I love and care about him so much. He’s 6 years older than me, and apparently much more experienced too…This is where I am getting at, I sincerely know that this guy cares about me, but I am very doubtful if he feels as strong as I feel for him. I am so down to do everything for him,,,but I guess he doesn’t notice. Its sad, because he is the only person I really like this way right now, and I can’t even think of anybody else but him! But it just feels like its just only me who’s trying to work this out for us. Its not like I am desperate, but this is just hurting me so bad, and I am just all confuse….Take note, I have tried to discuss this matter with him a few times,,,and I just get brushed off! Like I am a joke or something…
Please help!!!
PS
And by the way, if you are wondering what he does that makes me feel thi
2006-11-14 08:11:29 · 16 answers · asked by katrina_mendoza 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you're the only one who's trying then this isn't going to work. A good relationship get the two people involved. If he's not taking things seriously then you're wasting your time with this guy. Yes, you care about him, you might love him, bla,bla,bla, but I'll tell you what there are many other guys out there, as good as him and even better. You have to be with somebody who's as interested as you are.
2006-11-14 08:16:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was in a relationship like this one time. Iwas dating a girl and it seemed as though i was the only one trying to make it work well. She wouldn't talk to me about it either. Stop trying so hard. It might be starting to annoy him. THe age difference is a big factor. I mean, to me, age is just a number but I know that alot of people don't feel this way. If he doesn't feel as strongly about the relationship as you do, then you need to slow things down. Let him go at his own pace for a while so that he is more comfortable. That way, he will (hopefully) grow more fond of you and eventually the two of you will be on the same page. I'll pray for your situation.
Peace and Love,
Jared
p.s.
if he really cared about you then he wouldn't brush you off. he would want to hear what you have to say, you are wasting your time though if you aren't getting what you want.
2006-11-14 16:16:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you need to take some time away and spend some time with friends your age. I'm not sure why he got in to a relationship with you in the first place, but he obviously doesn't have the same idea about the relationship as you do. I know it can be hurtful even if you are the one who choses to opt out of a relationship, but you are young and need to do what feels good for you right now.
It's a confusing time in your life, and I would really hate to see you make a mistake you will regret later. Take care and be well.
2006-11-14 16:16:41 · answer #3 · answered by Mystee_Rain 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can so relate to you. I'm 19 and I was dating this guy who is 24. He is great and we both love each other very much even now that we are not together. well I always felt like he wasn't as committed to me as I was to him. now guys tend to take girls for granted and very often end up hurting us with out eve intending to do so. and its not that they dont care or are not on the same emotional level than you but they just are not very good at conveying their feelings. Now you also have to stop and think that girls mature faster than men do and this plays a big role in relationships . Good luck and I hope that you guys can find some common ground.
2006-11-14 16:18:30 · answer #4 · answered by M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is comfortable with the situation. Most guys don't want to "make waves" or get things going that are complicated. That's a man for ya! If he keeps blowing you off, maybe you should tell him that you can't wait around forever for Mr. Right. At the moment you are with him and maybe wasting time and missing out on Mr. Right. Think about it!
2006-11-14 16:21:59 · answer #5 · answered by Manna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is very rare that two people will feel the same about each other. This is why the divorce rate is so high nowadays.
In the majority of relationships, one partner will feel stronger than the other feels. Your relationship sounds average.
Remember, you can't really change him (from who he is), so if you don't like your relationship in it's current state, then I suggest you look for a new man. Perhaps one who cares for you as much as you care for him.
2006-11-14 16:16:28 · answer #6 · answered by crazyotto65 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
girl i feel ya, i'm somewhat in the same pradicament. This is what i did, I just put it all out there and I said "Ok we have been friends for a really REALLY long time, I know you have liked me and I just blew you off. Well now I'm ready...what do you think?" But, in your situation I think you should just get up all the courage you can and just put it out there so he knows. If he doesn't feel the same you can still be friends and you can try to control yourself. I'm not sayin this is going to be easy by any means, I know.... but girl, thats all I can tell you to do. Otherwise if you don't, someday you may regret NOT doing anything. Well if you do deciede to do anything please let me know how it goes, my name is Angie.
2006-11-14 16:21:14 · answer #7 · answered by Angie M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he's not as into you as you are into him. Decide whether you want to be with someone who keeps 'brushing you off' when you tell them about your feelings. It kinda seems like he just has you as a booty call and that is not good. You will only continue to be hurt by him. :( Good luck, girl.
2006-11-14 16:19:58 · answer #8 · answered by Mimi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boys and girls feel differently and look for different things in relationships. Unfortunately for girls, boys are not able to match your emotional feelings. We are just not wired that way. You need to check yourself and not get so caught up in being "in love" with someone who doesn't feel the same way. You could get seriously hurt.
2006-11-14 16:16:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he's trying to avoid the confrontation and feels very comfortable with the way things are.
2006-11-14 16:14:29 · answer #10 · answered by graciegirl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋