My partner has always refused to change the nappies of my 1 year old daughter. He does EVERYTHING else, entertaining, bathing, reading, feeding etc, but never nappies.
Now I don't really mind this as its not really a big job and he helps me out so much with everything else, plus works full time to pay for everything. But my sister and a couple of other people I have spoken to are horrified and say that wouldn't be acceptable to them and they would make him do it.
Is it really such a big deal?
2006-11-14 06:47:29 · 33 answers · asked by cigaro19 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Yes hes the father
2006-11-14 06:49:28 · update #1
If it doesn't bother you, then it isn't a problem. It really isn't anyone else's business how you and your partner raise your child. If he was doing nothing to raise and support your baby, I'd say there was a problem, but if it's just coming to diapers, it isn't so bad. I think he should bond with the child as much as possible, but as I said, if it doesn't bother you, let it go.
Everyone is going to have an opinion on how you should raise your baby. Just decide what is important to you and your family and stick with it.
2006-11-14 06:50:12 · answer #1 · answered by Sativa 4 · 4⤊ 1⤋
It is a big deal and it isn't at the same time. You should make sure he at least knows how to change her and is comfortable with doing so. One answerer addressed what I was going to mention, but it could use being reiterated anyway - He could just be scared of hurting her or something to that general gist. That way if you have to leave for a day for whatever the reason, he knows how to do it. You never know what might happen and he needs to know how to care for the little one. It sounds like he's picking up his fair share, though, and if it doesn't bother you, don't let someone else's opinion bother you. Opinions are like armpits, everyone has two and they usually stink.
2006-11-14 07:15:29 · answer #2 · answered by sovereign_carrie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't think it's a problem then it isn't.
He is taking an active roll in the child's well being and supporting his family.
Yes it would be good for him to have the knowledge and experience but if you are happy with the arrangements as they are then that should be all anyone else needs to know.
Stuff what everyone else thinks they are not living your life or raising your child and having happy parents who aren't arguing about nappy changing is best for the child.
Best Wishes
2006-11-14 06:58:30 · answer #3 · answered by angie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope my hubby was the same. Believe it or not the little female bits used to terrify him, I couldn't understand it at first, but then I came to realise they are totally foreign to a man aren't they? And if you think about when they are soiled you have to get right in and clean it up, it made him nervous of hurting her.
I don't think it's a big deal - in all other respects he sounds like superman - and just think how you can reciprocate when you have a boy - he'll have tons of nappies then!!!
2006-11-14 06:51:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
No it is not a big deal. Your partner is doing a whole lot more then some men. my brother law would change a diaper either and when he baby sat and the babies need changing he took the baby next door to the woman there.
I commend him for all he does do
2006-11-14 07:01:15 · answer #5 · answered by mamayer6 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES, it is. He needs to step up and take responsibility for even the bad parts of having a baby, they arn't just about cute and funny things the babys do when you feed them or whatever. This makes me mad just thinking about it. I'd say not changing the diapers EVER is a sure sign of immaturity.
2006-11-14 09:09:00 · answer #6 · answered by Rhiannon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its no big thing, lets face it given the chance would you opt out of changing nappies? I know I would!! He sounds like a loving dad who does lots of other things so I would just get on with it, its no big deal.
2006-11-14 08:16:09 · answer #7 · answered by Dingle-Dongle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband never changed diapers and I refuse to take the trash out. We're even! Don't allow other people to make decisions for you. Every family has certain things they follow and others don't have a right to criticize them.
2006-11-14 07:00:34 · answer #8 · answered by sayitlikeitis 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's acceptable yes! Especially since you say you're happy with it. I'm all about equal rights in couples but the fact he helps you out in every other way makes me think nothing is wrong, it is just one little thing afterall. I do all the housework for my partner except I NEVER wash pots! :-p Just one of those things!
2006-11-14 06:57:44 · answer #9 · answered by theanswer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It really shouldn't / doesn't matter, what anyone else thinks. If what you go going on is working and a healthy relationship, why make an issue? ignore the naysayers! After all its not there child, so don't let others tell you how you should be raising it.
2006-11-15 03:39:01 · answer #10 · answered by Maccie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋