I met him through a Christian dating site, emailed each other for 4 months and talking now by phone every day for 1 month. We both want to meet but live 10 hours apart. He can't visit me till he gets his vacation time next year. I have more flexibility since I'm self-employed. He invited me and my kids to meet him, his family and friends and pastor. He is a divorced single dad. The only thing holding me back is that I have 2 teens that I feel guilty about making them come on this roadtrip since it's to meet a man. He says he already knows I'm the one for him and believes in staying pure before marriage. I would love to meet him and see if he have compatibility in person since we already have spiritual and emotional compatibility. I just feel guilty because my kids are understandably not thrilled. Do you think I should go?
2006-11-14 05:44:24 · 24 answers · asked by sassygirl 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Since this has been going on for a while this is hardly a hasty decision. You have talked on the phone so he has heard the sincerity in your voice. He knows about your kids. You are both willing to accept each others past. He wants to introduce you to his parents and ask the blessing of his clergy. I have just one question for you. Do you want me to make the plane reservations for you ? GO NOW before he gets away. Most men would be scared off by a women who already has kids. This guy sounds like a keeper to me.
2006-11-14 05:55:08 · answer #1 · answered by David C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your kids are in their teens. I'd do it. Take the kids with you but have them sit somewhere else and observe. Meet at the mall or other public place. Also, tell everyone where you are going and how to reach you. I did that. I met a man online in a trivia channel. He is from the Netherlands. We had a long distance relationship for a while. He now lives here in the USA. We have been married for almost 5 years. Don't miss an opportunity to be happy, just be very careful.
2006-11-14 05:51:53 · answer #2 · answered by sexmagnet 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave the kids out of this. You only have his word about who this person is. If you must meet him, do sowith great caution. Take a sister or brother or trusted friend with you. Before you ever involve you kids, have a criminal check done on the dude. The most vulnerable, your kids could wind up paying a dear price if this thing goes bad. This most like isn't what you want to hear but you are respionsible for the safety of those kids. Due diligence is the best course. For many have paid a dear price for throwing caution to the wind.
2006-11-14 05:57:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would go to meet him, but I wouldn't bring my kids along on that first 'sighting'. Since it's a long trip, I would stay in a hotel that might be enjoyable for the kids (maybe one with an indoor pool). That way if all goes well with the man you could get everyone together over in a casual setting.
~ Good Luck~
2006-11-14 05:50:05 · answer #4 · answered by ~CountryGirl~ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. You should meet alone with him first. Wait til he can take a vacation. Don't make this your kids' problem. That would add undue stress. Get to know him first.
Why do two single parents have to stay pure before their marriage? If you're living by church rules, why did you both get divorced? Life is too short for this nonsense.
2006-11-14 05:48:41 · answer #5 · answered by Big Momma Carnivore 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the kids are old enough to understand what's going on and why you'd like to meet this guy then make this a family trip, but don't force them to go if they don't want to. If the kids are old enough to be left alone meet the guy somewhere where the kids can be in one place and you 2 meet somewhere close by. Say a mall with a theater or arcade where they can hang out, while you 2 enjoy each others company. That way the kids are close by but don't have to be with you.
Explain everything you think your kids are old enough to handle and hope they want you to be happy enough to meet your man and his family later. I met my guy on line. Fortunately we live in the same town and my kids wanted to meet him, but I met him first to make sure I even liked him in person.
2006-11-14 06:13:36 · answer #6 · answered by robbie347 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how does he know if he is the one for you??? that is for you to decide. Do not let a man, or anyone else for that matter, tell you how you feel. You are the only one who knows if a person is for you whether it is for friendship, or more. As for your kids going to meet him with you..hhmmm... save that for a later date. Perhaps you can arrange to meet him mid way on a weekend, and spend the day together to see what he is like. I always have found that it is best to meet new people, love interests and all on neutral territory.
2006-11-14 05:49:58 · answer #7 · answered by NoItAll 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well be honest with yourself on this.. Do u want to take your kids or do u feel that u should wait.. Just my suggestion.... Go and meet this man first, maybe take along a friend... then once u are comfortable with him then have your kids meet him.. I know u want your kids to like him as well.. Which im sure they will once they get to know him a little better.. Good luck to u and happy holidays to u
2006-11-14 05:48:37 · answer #8 · answered by blue eyes 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say no to bringing your kids along, and possibly putting them in danger. I met a lady on a christian dating sit that was five hours away, and I was very uneasy of what to expect. You just don't know, so if you can, go by yourself, meet at a public place and God bless
2006-11-14 05:48:50 · answer #9 · answered by Light Bringer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should go with a close friend first. Then take your kids later. If I was in that position, as your kid, I wouldn't feel very comfortable. Especially if it's you and the guy's first time meeting.
2006-11-14 05:46:34 · answer #10 · answered by Your_Star 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋