I was the same bar a couple of weeks on Saturdays. I was sitting at the bar (as I came alone and didn't know any one there). One of the bartenders was trying to flirt with me both times. She had memorized my drink the second time and didn't charge for the first round. Was high-fiving me when her fav. songs were being played. Do bartenders generally do this just to get extra tips or was she hitting on me? I wanted to ask her out, but was a little hesitant because this is totally unchartered waters for me.
By the way, I did tip her, but only the normal amount I always do
2006-11-14 05:38:54 · 15 answers · asked by Existentialist_Guru 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I have bar tended for 15 years
I flirted and at times bought a drink for a customer and not because I was trying to pick them up but because I liked having repeat customers.
NOW, in your case I cant really answer weather or not she was hitting on you but I can say, If you want to ask her out and she is not married, go for it, what is the worse that can happen, she could say no.
That does not mean she is not interested in you, she may be playing hard to get.
Bartenders get a bad wrap for dating inside work but not all are bad.
Go with your gut and have some fun.
2006-11-14 05:51:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a female, but not a bartender. Personally, I don't bother with bartenders, bouncers, or guys in the band. People in those positions get 'tang thrown at them left and right and flirted with aaaaaallll the time. Not that I'm attacking you but don't think that just cuz she's sociable that money or flirtation is the motive necessarily. She was probably being a good bartender, saw a guy sitting there alone and decided to chat him up and make him feel welcome in the establishment, and increase her chance of getting a better tip. If you really wanna ask her out go in there a few more times and try to be chatty on a friendly basis, ask how long she's been working there, blah blah blah. But not too much, it can appear stalker-ish real quick. See what vibes you get from her. Tip good and you'll get free drinks and earn brownie points. No woman likes a cheap man, not even us non gold diggers.
2006-11-14 17:10:00 · answer #2 · answered by Sandy Sandals 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I was bartending, there was always some fun going on. In my case, nothing beyond being nice and helpful. I never paid a drink to a customer, maybe because I did not feel necessary. You can always ask her if she often pays a drink to a guy. This way you might find if you are different from the others. From there, you will know if is safe to invite her for a drink. Your turn to pay. "Can I pay you a drink after work or when you are free"?
2006-11-14 14:19:49 · answer #3 · answered by Cister 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
More than likely she was working the bar (for tips) that's the job. Plus it's also to get people happy, excited about being there, telling their friends what a great time they had at (insert name).
What is the worse thing that could happen? She'd say no, so you either leave like a coward, or you stay and have fun, make a new friend or two.
2006-11-14 13:51:17 · answer #4 · answered by Stephie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I used to be a bartender and I use to flirt with all the men, because that's our job, the owners usually wants the bartenders to be friendly, plus its all about tips. But if you are interested in this woman, than get some balls are ask her out.
2006-11-14 13:48:40 · answer #5 · answered by KerryAnn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You got a free drink but weren't generous on the tip? And you say you are some what interested in this girl? Come on guy! I hope you aren't an ambassador or in PR!
It is too hard for me to judge if she is interested in you or not. She might have an engaging personality with everyone. Go a few more times. See if she is like that with everyone or just you.
Ask her out.
2006-11-14 15:37:52 · answer #6 · answered by Think.for.your.self 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Either that is just her normal upbeat personality and she does this with everyone (sounds like a fun bartender) - you would have to observe how she was with the other customers to determine if this is true.
or
she was specifically flirting with you
She sounds like a cool person, life of the party type. If I were you I would make a move if you are interested in her. You only have something to gain by asking her out, unless this is someplace you frequent often and don't want to make things weird.
2006-11-14 13:44:44 · answer #7 · answered by sara b 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In my experience, female bartenders don't flirt with everyone. If they do flirt with you, that means they like you at least enough to give a flirt or two. That doesn't mean they dont' find a lot of guys worthy of flirting with, so I wouldn't say that you're all that yet. But it is a good sign that if you went back and she flirted with you again, that you could ask her out with a good possibility that she will say yes. Good luck.
2006-11-14 13:42:07 · answer #8 · answered by xorosho 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all if she gave you a free drink, you should tip he more than usual. But on to your question...did she seem to be flirting with other guys at the bar, or just you? If she was flirting with only you those nights, you should ask her out. Why not, you only live once!
2006-11-14 14:11:36 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's a hard call. I flirt when the guy is cute, I get better tips. When I was single I flirted if I was interested too. Go back and see if she recognizes you. It is entirely possible she was into you. Ask her out. The worst thing that could happen is she'd say no. On the plus side she might say yes!
2006-11-14 13:48:39 · answer #10 · answered by Crazymom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋