I am 32 and my girlfriend is 30, we have been dating for 1 month already and we really love each other and feel very happy together. Now, considering we are not teenagers anymore, you think that a 3 months period is too soon to get engaged to my other half? I am afraid she could get freaked out when I propose, but also believe if she loves me as much as she says she does, she will be more really happy to get engaged to me.
Any help will be really appreciated.
2006-11-14 04:48:56 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
You DEF need to talk to her to make sure she is on the same page as you. My parents decided they were going to get married on their first date (my mom was 27 and my dad was 33). I know that sounds weird (and my mom says she'll kill me if I ever do that) but they got married 8 months later and have been happily married for 31 years. If it wasn't for the two of them, I'm not sure I would believe that you can be in love for that long. They are so happy together it disgusts me at times. My point is, you are both mature adults. You should wait a while before you actually get married, but if it's true love than it's true love? Who has the right to stop (or judge) you?
2006-11-14 06:32:37 · answer #1 · answered by Eve 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Yes, I think 3 months is probably too soon, unless both of you have had a lot of relationship experience, and have a very good idea of what you're looking for. If you have only been dating for a month, and are considering engagement already, this in itself tells me that you're either a very compulsive person or that you are not very experienced in relationships. I'm not putting you down, please don't take it personally; I'm just pointing out a potential red flag. I would highly recommend to give it a few months, and if you still feel the same at the time, then pop the question. (From my own personal experience, my most passionate relationships only lasted for 2-3 months, and then fizzled out for one reason or another. It's too easy to get caught up in the whole novelty factor in the beginning.)
2006-11-14 06:03:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
My wife (35) and I (33) got engaged after knowing each other for about 6 months but then had another year and a half before we actually got married (I was finishing college). Most people think that's super fast, but it worked for us. After being married for 10 1/2 years, and 3 kids later, I would definitely say that it's not something to rush into. Take your time. Make sure you talk about EVERYTHING before you get married, especially the "big stuff" like religion, family, kids, money, etc. There will be tons of disagreements over the years, but if you are on the same page on the "big stuff", then it makes it possible to get through the other stuff.
2006-11-14 05:00:52 · answer #3 · answered by DGS 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Dr. Phil says that people who marry between 6 & 18 months after dating have more successful marriages. My hubby & I got engaged after about 3 months but our engagement was about 10 months. We started dating in Feb. and married the following March. It worked out well for us. We had plenty of time to get to know each other and each other's families before the wedding and lots of time to actually plan the wedding together.
Good luck! I hope she says yes!
2006-11-14 05:03:39 · answer #4 · answered by WeaselLuvr 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yes and no. Some people can fall in love very quickly, but getting married changes everything. You may find that you guys aren't as compatible as ye might think ye are, especially since ye haven't lived together yet I'm assuming. Maybe you should wait a year before getting engaged or marrying.
2006-11-14 04:55:36 · answer #5 · answered by angel_girl2248 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My strong recommendation is to not marry until you have known each other for at least a year. That way there should be few unhappy surprises. Marriage is, after all, a lifetime commitment. How much of that year is "just dating" and how much of the year is engaged depend on what feels right for the TWO of you.
Best of luck to the two of you.
2006-11-14 05:08:40 · answer #6 · answered by Hums2oldies 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
1 month 3 month I am confused about time difference but I say go for it and have a long engagement. Good Luck!
2006-11-14 04:57:06 · answer #7 · answered by sunshine2507 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think it's a little soon to be proposing marriage. You might tell her how happy you feel with her, and tell her you are thinking this might be THE relationship. Get to know her better, learn about her family, her likes and dislikes, her little habits, her religious beliefs, her feelings about pets, children. money management. Where does she see herself in 5 years, where do you see yourself? There are a lot of little things that can make or break a marriage.
2006-11-14 05:35:18 · answer #8 · answered by toomeymimi 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
my husband and I were together for 1 month when he asked.....we were together for 6 months when we got married....I was 19 and he was 20......when you know, you just know....only you and your GF will know what is right..............my husband and I have been married for 3 years and we will be celebrating another year on Dec. 11th.... We have a 2 year old son, and another due in June....... And we are as happy as ever...so I say go for it!!! And Good Luck.
2006-11-14 06:22:15 · answer #9 · answered by Mommy of 2 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Of course it is too soon, you need to be together at least one year before thinking about this - you need to go through the seasons, holidays, spend time with each other's families, etc.
2006-11-14 22:48:59 · answer #10 · answered by Lydia 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋