How do you deal with an incarcerated family member?

Answer 1

My husband is in prison. There are some things I suggest.

First and Most Important: Take care of YOURSELF first!

2: Get involved with a support group or even an advocacy group to know what the issues are and help keep yourself involved.

3. Keep a journal and write every day or every few days to watch your progress.

4. Write to your loved one every day or so and then send out the letters once a week.

5. Keep busy. Get involved with your community, find a hobby, spend time friends and family. Keep yourself distracted.

It's very costly to have a loved on in prison. Many families are paying for Personal Hygiene, Canteen, Education, Clothing, Medical expenses, etc. Limit yourself on a budget. I'm only able to send my husband $25.00 a month.

The cost of the phone bill can be outrageous. Set up a schedule to talk once or twice a week to help cut down the cost.
If you are able to visit, try once a week, Every Other Week, or Once a Month. Gas prices are out of control.

Also keep in mind you have a life and sometimes inmates forget this. Its okay to feel upset and depressed. But always take care of yourself first.

If you want to contact me, feel free to. Loved ones of inmates are the forgotten people in society and looked down upon, no matter what their loved ones did or didn't do. We need support. I also have a listing of various email groups I am involved with who are made up of people with loved ones in prison.

My email address is: [e-mail]

Answer 2

Write them and give them moral support. The letters give them something to look forward too and can help to influence them to better themselves by giving them something to look forward to when they get out. If you can spare $10 or $20 now and then it helps also. The prison system barely provides their needs and the money can be used for personal hygiene, some basic needs and an occasional treat. Visit if you can as that shows them someone cares. The more support that an inmate gets from family members, the better their chances to make it when they get out. I know, I have a son who is incarcerated.

Answer 3

Keep in touch, letters mean everything to people that are incarcerated, don't send a lot of money to them because they don't really need too much, but keep in mind that they do have to pay for their own hygiene products and try to send enough to cover that, twenty bucks every two weeks should cover it, try to be supportive without enabling their behavior... you don't want them to think that it's okay to continue their behavior. Don't be a third party release and don't let them parole to your home, set up a half way house for them instead, I haven't been to a town yet where there wasn't one within 30 miles, don't shut them off from your life but you have to let them make their own decisions and hopefully learn from their mistake, they can't do that under your roof with you supporting them, set boundaries and stick with them.

Answer 4

Write them a long letter as much as possible and let them know that you aren't happy with the fact that they are there but that you still love them and will be there for them if they need you. Also go to see them as much as you can... being in prison is hard.. some people lose their sense of what it is like to be in the real world.... Just make sure they know you support them as a person and not necessary what they did.

Answer 5

Well, if you are fond of this person, then keep your relationship going with cards, visits perhaps, but if this is a family member who has done something that leaves you feeling uncomfortable, then remember, that person is the one in jail for a reason, if you don't feel comfortable with them, let them be and get on with your life.
Have a great life, have a bigger than life life!

Answer 6

when my brother was incarcerated ...i wrote to him and visited when i could .... we would make sure that someone would visit on the weekends that a family member couldn't ..as this was his first time being incarcerated ...but we told him that if he ended up there again we wouldn't be coming to visit ...it is a punishment for the family as well as those who are in carcerated !!! good luck

Answer 7

You need to write them as much as you can, you can put a bit of money on there books, but not too much that prison gets comfortable, but write them alot, they read, and re read the letters all the time, they even pass them around, and others read the messages, speak life to them, talk to them about getting saved, and going to church, even though they don't want to hear that at all, but believe me over time, they will love you for it. send them pictures they love that, it makes them feel included in family things, in a funny way.

God Bless

Answer 8

They EARNED their lot all by themselves. They are apparently old enough to make decisions on their own and obviously made some wrong decisions. THEY need to go thru things on their own in order to learn what they need to.
Let them learn the hard way...It was THEIR choice.