What has happened to society?! Is it really that bad if we spank our children?

Question

What has happened to society?! Is it really that bad if we spank our children?

Yes, I am aware that if done too hard, for too long, spanking is a form of abuse. But, if the child acts up, and you warn him, and STILL ignores you, I think a good spanking is called for (A good spanking is like ten slaps on the rear).
Am I wrong in this thought?

Back in the day when spanking was accepted, and was actually encouraged, kids KNEW respect! They thought twice before they acted up again! So, is spanking really that big of a deal? When I was little I WAS spanked. And I DON’T resent my parents for it! They taught me what was right, and what was wrong! I NEVER acted up in public, I showed my parents respect and I acted my age most of the time.

I remember when I was grounded. LOL! That NEVER worked! The moment I was ‘free’, I was back out causing trouble! But the moment I was spanked, my mouth was shut, and I was doing my chores with a smile on my face!

So is spanking really that bad if it is managed in a way so that the punishment never crosses the line to abuse?

By the way, who says spanking is done out of anger? I would NEVER spank my child if I was angry at them!

It is PUNISHMENT! If the child does something wrong after a warning or two, then the child gets a slap of too!

And to those that say ‘studies show that children act better’…LOOK AROUND! I know 20 kids that have never been spanked, and are the WORST children I know.

Answer 1

I think spanking can depending on the age of the child. I think it is more effective on younger kids who need to know the action is wrong there and then.
However I think older kids need something that lasts a little longer and will get them thinking about what they did wrong, perhaps taking away priviledges and giving them extra chores, of course I also think the odd spank to accompany these punishments never goes astray.
The real trick is not to cross the boundry between punishing them and simply making them afraid to put a foot wrong, they need to make mistakes too its all part of growing up.

Answer 2

Here's my opinion:
I was spanked as a child. I am now a pretty disciplined young adult and I do very well in school. I did, however, end up with OCD, but that may have just been passed down to me.
I have to say, though, that a good spanking is a single spank. My dad would slap me on the butt really hard once and that would be enough. I don't think ten is necessary.
Overall, I turned out fine in terms of discipline. But I have also grown up as an over-sensitive person who gets really upset when I get yelled at by someone. I don't know if that has anything to do with it.
You are the parent, so you make the choices. As long as you know what is crossing the line, you are probably right.

Answer 3

My mom never spanked me and I turned out to be a good person in life.

I would of resented my mom. She taught me right from wrong with out any physical contact.

What works for some parents don't always work for others.

That is why society is split on spanking v.s non spanking.

Answer 4

No one here is going to like my answer, but here is my 2 cents.
I am not trying to judge other parents, but I was just thinking about this topic in the past few days. I feel I would have failed as a parent (and this is only for me that I feel this way) as well as failed at being a human being if I hit my child. My child has a beautiful soul that needs to be nurtured & I feel there must be some other way I can help him be disciplined even if he were to repeat mistakes. Right and wrong, I feel, are so subjective. I was spanked by my mother (a single mom) numerous times, and I understand that times were rough for her and spanking was something she had to resort to to make the message clear to me, quickly. The thing is though, I am married and a stay at home mother and all my time is devoted to raising this beautiful little soul and I don't have all the worries my mother had. So I think it is possible for me to raise a behaved child with absolutely no violence.

What's difficult for me is sometimes having the urge to use violence to get my toddler to understand something, but I just think back to when my mother would spank me and I remember feeling that maybe if she talked to me about actions and their consequences, not just for me but for everyone involved, and spent that little bit of quality time, mustered up any bit of patience she had left at that moment, that this issue would be of no concern to me in the current day. I hope I can do this with my child and can carry it through until he is an adult.

Best of luck to you and your children, whatever you may do to understand each other.

Answer 5

Kids need to know that there is a penalty for acting up. Time outs and groundings have their place but most kids don't care about those. I know that when I was little I would think twice before doing something stupid because I knew that the yardstick was in the corner :) I try to teach our children respect but it is so hard when they go to school and see other kids that just don't give a damn because the have no consequences for misbehaving at home.

Answer 6

I very much agree with spanking--but only under certain conditions. If the child is told something and still doesn't listen, they get a spanking.

I don't think a spanking should ever be more than one or two swats on the butt. I don't think it should ever be on a bare bottom or done with an object either.

Spankings are a great way to discipline. The kids who aren't spanked are actually some of the worst behaved children I've ever seen in my life.

Answer 7

Yes you should spank kids in today world they need it more and more. There is a difference in abuse and spanking. You have to know when it is to hard. I spank my daughter and I was spanked as child. I have seen kids where they did not have spankings and they don't have any respect for anyone or for themselves

Answer 8

I guess I'm alone here but I don't believe spanking is right. I think if you are a good parent, you should be able to demand your child's respect and attention without violence. I was personally never spanked as a child (my dad smacked me across the face once when I was 16 but I sooo deserved it) and I in turn, will never spank my children. I have an almost-two-year-old (you know, the terrible twos) but I can't imagine what she could ever do that would deserve to be hit. You should control your anger if you want your child to have control of his/hers. I've seen my sister-in-law punish her daughter for hitting by spanking her...just doesn't make any sense to me. Studies have shown that children who are punished in other ways behave better later. If you tell your child you are disappointed in them when they do something wrong, that'll teach them more than hitting them. But we all have a right to our own opinion...to each his own.

Answer 9

I think in some cases a good spanking is called for and acceptable. As long as it is not the only form of punishment a child gets.

Answer 10

a personal choice in child rearing,but so many people have crossed a line that it has become an issue for a childs safety.my personal choice is not to hit,i believe that you teach children to solve problems w/ hitting again a personal choice.if [ spanking ] is a choice for you never do it out of anger walk away w/ a warning first. happy holidays