One morning while making breakfast, a man walked up to his wife and pinched her on her butt and said, "You know if you firmed this up we could get rid of your girdle." While this was on the edge of intolerable, she thought herself better and replied with silence. The next morning the man woke his wife with a pinch on the breast and said, "You know if you firmed these up we could get rid of your bra." This was beyond a silent response, so she rolled over and grabbed him by the pen!s. With a death grip in place she said, "You know if you firmed this up we could get rid of the postman, the gardener, the poolman and your brother.
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Patient: Doctor, how can you say so firmly, without checking,that I need glasses?
Doctor: Because, in spite of the door being open, you came in through the window...
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Sardar Singh was very keen on doing his Ph.D. He was in search of a subject on which no one did any research before! As he was thinking over it, he found a cockroach on the table in from of him. He decided instantly to do a research on the roach. He picked the roach and put it in the center of the table and said, "Run". The roach ran. He pulled out one leg of the roach, put it again in the center of the table and said, "Run". The roach ran. He pulled one more leg of the roach, put it again in the center of the table and said, "Run". The roach ran. This way the roach tried to run even when it had just one leg. He pulled last leg of the roach, put it again in the center of the table and said, "Run". The roach could not! Our Professor was satisfied with his study and started writing his thesis: "When you pull out all the legs of a roach, it cannot hear anymore".
2006-11-14 02:52:01 · 18 answers · asked by Janey 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
An old maid wanted to travel by bus to the pet cemetery with the remains of her cat. As she boarded the bus, she whispered to the driver, I have a dead *****.
The driver pointed to the woman in the seat behind him and said, "Sit with my wife. You two have a lot in common.
2006-11-14 03:13:19 · update #1
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!
TERRIFIIIIIIIIC!
Verrrrrrrrrrrry funny!!!
ALL OF THEM!!!
2006-11-14 03:23:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The first one proves do not criticize if you can not take it back.
The second one proves that a doctor always knows best.
And the third one proved that the professor must of bought his diploma from a grocery store vending machine.
All three very add up to some great jokes thanks for sharing them.
2006-11-14 03:02:37 · answer #2 · answered by eeyoree rocks2003 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are asking if they are funny... the first is pretty much like some others I've heard recently. The second one doesn't make sense and the last one is kind of cruel
2006-11-14 02:57:05 · answer #3 · answered by gingerrg 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Those were funny! Who would want to touch a roach tho?
2006-11-14 03:00:49 · answer #4 · answered by me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For the third one 5*
Sorry know the other two.
2006-11-14 02:56:15 · answer #5 · answered by ♣ My Brainhurts ♣ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOVED the first one. The others arent bad, but the first one, hahahaha I cant stop cracking up. I will defiantly be sharing that one with my fiance tonight....
Thanks for the laugh
2006-11-14 02:55:39 · answer #6 · answered by chanda 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First & last jokes fab, what happened in the middle?
2006-11-14 13:15:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is so funny i love the first one and the last one, omg, the cracked me up! more more more more more more
2006-11-14 02:59:08 · answer #8 · answered by livinia 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
LOL love the last one
2006-11-14 02:55:44 · answer #9 · answered by ed.knight 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lol the first was the best!!! but i like the last one too!
xxxx
2006-11-14 02:55:54 · answer #10 · answered by don't stop the music ♪ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol i love the 1st one
2006-11-14 02:58:12 · answer #11 · answered by val 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋