Why does my 16yr old stepdaughter start trouble constantly around the house with other children in the house?

Answer 1

There are a lot of reasons that could be behind her behavior.
1. She is being a normal teen, and rebelling in her own way.
2. She is resentful over the divorce or re-marriage, and wants to make trouble for you as the step-mom.
3. She feels left behind in the new family, and wants attention.
4. She is trying to show the other kids how cool she is because she is a rebel.
5. She is showing off because she wants them to look up to her.

It's a much longer list, but these are some of the more common reasons for the actions of a teen in this situation. Talk to her with your husband (her father) and see what you two as a couple can do for her. Maybe she wants to spend more time together, maybe she wants more freedom, maybe she wants to do more as a family, etc... Then see if there is a compromise that will make you both happy.

And make sure you two are ready and willing to enforce any rules. She is still a child (even as a teen) and it's up to you as the adults to guide her down the path you want her to follow in life. I'm not talking about a career or anything, but the personal morals and ethics that you feel are right. When she screws up, make sure the punishment fits the crime, and that you stick to it.

For example, she came home an hour and a half after curfew. So you ground her for one week. No phone, no cell phone (if she has one), no TV, no computer (except for school work), no video games, and no going out with friends. Whatever applies to her, and what you feel is fair. If you catch her doing any of these things, she is grounded for an extra week. And every time she rebels, you add on a week.

Simple concept, but hard to do. You and your husband have to stand firm when she throws a fit, and tries to talk her way out of it. And you have to make sure that if her natural mother is in the picture somewhere, she will agree to enfore punishements on her end as well. This girl needs some discpline in her life, and having a mom who lets her get away with everything isn't going to help at your house. Then you and your husband just end up being the "bad guys" and she won't follow your rules, or respect you the way you deserve.

If all else fails, try family counseling. It may sound extreme, but it could help the girl work through her problems, and get to the bottom of her behavior that may or may not be normal.

Answer 2

Your Daugher is experiencing a lot of different feelings. Being 16 is hard enough but when you are going through family changes sometimes it takes a while to adjust. She may have feelings of jealousy and anger... it could also be betrayal and hurt. She may feel like these other children have taken her spot in your heart. You need to sit down with your daughter and tell her that you love her and always will. She needs to know that she can come to you at anytime with questions, stories, etc..... It's your job to keep all in the house happy. If it means taking away from your own happiness for a while you need to do that. It would help if you had your partner talk to her as well and have him explain that he loves you and wants to make you happy. And that includes her !!!! Take things 1 step at a time and eventually things will work themselves out ! Take Care and good luck

Answer 3

Are the other children from you or children you and your new husband have had together?She is probably jealous and wants the attention.I have the same problem except she starts it with me.She is 12 and also suffers from ADD.We had so many problems with her we took her to a counselor.Worked for a week or so then back to the same old b.s. My hubby and I fight all the time over her.That is the only thing we fight over! We are thinking of finding her mother and letting her go back with her it has got so bad.I feel she doesn't want to get close to any women after being taken from her mother because of her drug and alcohol problems.That was 10n yrs. ago though.Does your stepdaughter see her mother? Do they have a good relationship? This sounds terrible but I feel mine is just a spiteful little girl and I'm paying the price. Good luck to you!!!

Answer 4

You may want to go to FAMILY counceling. Everyone is involved in this circle. You usually get revelations you did not have before because a good councelor can bring out a lot of things we miss. Our family did this and believe me I am so very glad we did. The councelor also acted as a 3rd party to reveal to our daughter how her actions affected others -this took us out of the loop and softened the blow so to speak. She also spoke with us individually and taught us how we needed to change some so we could more easily handle and understand the motivation behind her behavior.
One thing we did notice was we had 3 kids who had thier "thing" -sports & theatre. The other one (the one who cause the stir in the household) did not. She felt like she had no "talent" and we were doting on the ones who were involved in these activities.
We discovered she had a great interest in photography and was very good with it. She seemed to be very pleased and it boosted her self image and confidence. She is now the official photographer when we get together for any family function.

Answer 5

If she's the only stepdaughter in the house, she may feel she's not completaly part of the family. Maybe more attention and love has been given to the other children to make her think that way. Maybe you should talk to her and try being more caring and affectionate to her, that may be all she wants.

Answer 6

i don't think of it is irrelevant with the aid of fact- one million) You and her dad merely isn't fascinated in her. 2) She isn't attempting to allure to you. 3) adult males can walk around with their shirts off, and he or she's merely masking up her factors so what's the difficulty? 4) it is almost the comparable as a bikini which she would be waiting to run down the sea coast in public in. 5) it is summer- it is warm out! 6) you're at residing house. as long as she isn't answering any doorways or status in front of the window, it is effective. 7) maximum women are actually not gentle doing this, yet she is. sturdy for her! She has self assurance in herself.

Answer 7

The poor lass wants attention. Talk to her and see if something is troubling her. Maybe you should take her out shopping or something. Kids are not naturally bad. Something is obviously troubling her for her to be acting as such.

Answer 8

She needs attention... that the only way she get is by creating trouble. You guys need to spend more time with her...one on one.

Answer 9

perhaps she doesnt feel noticed enough and is deprived of attention.
that tends to happen when there are blended families and multiple children in the house.

Answer 10

It sounds like she is seeking attention. Maybe you could take a little time to spend with just her to make her feel special.