Would you give a child up for adoption if they were born with a disability?

Answer 1

I think it is too easy to say "No", because you never know how you can cope. There are different disabilities and they need different care. I would love my child no matter what, but if I wasn't able to care for it appropriately, I don't know.
I love my partner and so I would love that child. It is not the child's fault that it is disabled, but it also depends on the mental strain of the parent. If keeping this child means that your life will be hell, then it will reflect on the child itself and it might feel like a burden.
It is a very difficult question and I think that being in such a situation would make us think maybe differently as many do now.

Answer 2

No. Never, ever, ever. It's MY baby. I kept him/her inside of me for 9 months, I'm the one that went through all of the pain and suffering, I'm the one that held it when it was born. I don't know of anyone in an adoption or foster care program that takes a disabled child because they feel sorry for it, or because they love it. Foster/Adoptive parents that I know take the child in for the money.
I have a friend that is a Foster Parent and has one child that's paralyzed from birth, one with Downs syndrome, and that's blind, and one that's autistic. She lives in the most expensive neighborhood in my city and has a huge house. She has a nanny, so whenever we get together, she talks freely about the way she really feels about her "Children." She tells me all the time what a burden they are, how she wishes that she never signed up for them, and I'm just sitting there at the restaurant table saying to myself, "How can she be so cruel?" But she keeps the kids because they are her only source of income.
I would never give my child up. No matter what. There are all sorts of programs and services to help families with disabled children.

Answer 3

I think it would depend on whether or not I was in the position to give the child the best care available. I had a friend who recently found out that her 1 year old son is blind and brain damaged and she is blaming everyone around her, including her previous land lord for his problems. She has also found out that her ex-best friend is pregnant and says that she hopes that there is something wrong with the baby because why should the friend get a perfect baby when she has one with a disability. She has also told people that she wants to try for another baby because she wants a perfect one too. I think that in this situation, the baby would have been better off being adopted by someone who could and would love him unconditionally, instead of the cow of a mother that he has.

Answer 4

Years ago when I gave birth to my daughter it was the most wonderful time of my life when the nurse brought her to me all wrapped in a yellow blanket....I was so happy tears streamed down my face just looking at her knowing she was all mine and her dads.
Little did I know she would only be with us a short time....she lived to be 22 years old. All we have are memories now. To get to your question...if I had a child born with a disability....I'd accept that child and love him or her no matter the child's condition. Each human deserves to live their life without anyone's interference. In this country the USA..so much focus is put on beauty the outside and not the inside the heart and soul of a person. No wonder some people feel if they are not like someone on the front of a fashion magazine they are not acceptable. Every person has a gift to give the world. We are not to judge anyone who is different from you or I. Who knows that person born with a deformed hand might be the person who discovers the cure for cancer? cure for MS? who knows what that person holds to give to the world. So my answer is NO

Answer 5

It would depend on the disability and the cost of care. If I found out in pregnancy about a severe disability I would terminate rather then carry to term and give the child up for adoption.

Answer 6

i think it is something each of us needs to look into ourselves for,what is nothing to one person may be too much for another,as it is the parents of a child with disabilities who need to make this choice who better to know how they would cope than they themselves,,its easy to be bullied into keeping a child with problems but if you are doing it for the wrong reasons and you know you cant cope you are not going to enjoy the experience and may even become bitter.there are many loving homes out there and many people who specifically opt for disabled children because they KNOW they have a gift,,what is right for some is not right for all and the main person who matters,,is the child.it is not a choice that comes without any help,,it is available,,it is not a choice that will just come to you,,it takes great thought but if you know you have made the right decision that is BEST for the child,,what more can you do!

Answer 7

No. I remember reading a beautiful essay many years ago about what it is like to have a child with a disability. it compared being pregnant to preparing for a trip to France. For nine whole months you prepare and look forward to this trip. Some of your friends may also be going, arrriving ar various times. Some are already there. They all talk about how wonderful France is and you can't wait to get there yourself. The time comes. You board the plane, and after hours in flight the pilot announces "Welcome to Holland". You didn't want to go to Holland. You did not prepare for Holland. Yet here you are. Meanwhile everyone else is constantly talking about how wonderful France is. Once you get over the initial shock and disappointment, you begin to see that Holland is a beautiful place also. You begin to appreciate the wonder and beauty of where you are.

Answer 8

I dont know until i am in that situation? I have a daughter already who is perfectly healthy but if she was born with disabilities then adoption would be considered, Why? well i was 17 at the time i had my daughter with no financial security or time to dedicate my life to a disabled child this may sound selfish but i would think it best for the child at that time.

Answer 9

No no no no. With my first child, I had a brilliant pregnancy but the birth went completely wrong and my son was born practically dead from lack of oxygen. Scans were carried out and brain damage was confirmed but how bad, no-one was willing to say. We were told by the doctors that our child would never walk, etc etc. (on christmas day, no less!) Not for one minute did I think 'I don't want this child anymore. I want to give him away. Can I put him back please?' It is stressful and sad and certainly very frightening but we just got on with what needed to be done to help our boy. He had therapy for 7 years and now is a strapping 13 year old lad who, if you saw him with his peers, you wouldn't know that he has any difficulties. Just because a child is not 'perfect' it doesn't make them unlovable or dispensable.

Answer 10

no i wouldn't. i work with children that have disabilities such as blind, autistic, deaf, down syndrome, learning dificulties and many more and they are still people. they still want to be loved and cared for. they all have their own needs and i respect parents that look after their children. if you are gifted with a child that has a disability then so be it. maybe its lifes way of telling you that not everything in the world is perfect, but look around. there is no perfect family now in the world. each family is unique and everyone needs to remember that there are children out there with disabilities and they want to be loved just as much as children that dont have disabilities!