The thing is, he is not AT ALL abusive. I am not AT ALL concerned that he would ever, ever hit me or touch me angrily in a physical way. We are going to be married soon and have a really wonderful relationship.
The thing is, he has gotten angry with me about 3 times in our relationship and yelled so loudly at me (usually in the car where it sounds louder then it probably is) but even one time practically screamed. Now, the problem is that usually when this happens either he or I have been drinking. The first two times he was but tonight it was only me. He called me names (nothing really that bad) but yelled at me at the top of his voice until I cried and asked him to leave. He didn't, though. He just came in and apologized for making me feel bad. Alcohol has been involved in some of our fights but I have never, EVER yelled at him or spoken to him the way that he talks to me in those moments. I would never speak to him the way he speaks to me. He would never hit. So what is up?
2006-11-13 17:52:48 · 8 answers · asked by wendyshannon 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I forgot to say why he got angry! I walked away from his apartment tonight because it was a really nice night and I thought he was watching television. (which is what he was doing all night, but the way) I was sitting on his back porch and did not think anything of walking through the neighborhood for a minute. He came looking for me and got FURIOUS! He thought I was running away from him or something which was not AT ALL the case. I was simply taking a walk. As SOON, (I mean, the instant) I heard his voice I came running back to his porch scared because he was missing me. He didn't see it that way and swore up and down that I was lying. Nothing I said made a differerence. He didn't believe me at all and thought I was up to no good. I could not convince him. That's when the angry yelling began. He said it was because he was worried about me, but nobody in my entire family (including my mom and dad) have ever talked to me that way no matter how worried they were for me. Why?
2006-11-13 18:04:17 · update #1
Sounds to me like he was worried about you. Does he live in a bad neighborhood? If alcohol is involved in most of your fights, I think you already know the answer. He probably loves you and was worried like he would be if he lost a child.
As far as yelling I think its because his temper flared because he felt out of control of the situation and found it all unnecessary after he found you on his porch. Men dont like to feel out of contol. Its like they lost their cool.
.................And he sounds freakin hot. I would marry him if I were you.
2006-11-14 05:27:34 · answer #1 · answered by Theandysullivan 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If alcohol isn't a necessity, cut the alcohol out of the equation. If the yelling continues, then I would seriously consider going to some sort of premarital counseling before getting married. Coming from a person that has seen the yelling escalade into "love taps" that have developed into hitting....it's better to see for yourself how things can be handled now instead of later when you find yourself stuck in a bad situation.
2006-11-13 18:05:12 · answer #2 · answered by Angelkiss 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's called normal life. People get mad sometimes. If you've never been mad enough to yell at him, then you probably don't know him well enough to marry him.
2006-11-13 18:00:32 · answer #3 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
he sounds like a control freak to me - getting angry cos you went for a walk without what?..asking his permission, its not like your a child that he has to scold you or anything, you can do what you want...abuse doesnt have to be physical ya know,theres emotional and verbal abuse too.
he needs to go to anger management classes or something, if he's genuinely sorry he should be willing to do it. you need to make it clear that your not going to accept his behaviour
2006-11-13 18:17:59 · answer #4 · answered by ash1 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
yell back, curse him, the push his face back if he comes close to me.
2006-11-13 17:56:20 · answer #5 · answered by U Think U Know Me 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Then YOU take charge and tell him who's boss.
I like it when girls do that, maybe he does too.
2006-11-13 17:55:19 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
wow whatd ya do to piss him off so much
2006-11-13 17:56:46 · answer #7 · answered by New Jersey Steve 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
give him a headbutt!
2006-11-13 17:55:13 · answer #8 · answered by pit_bulldog 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋