Am I a bad daughter?

Question

my dad came from jail when i was like 9. im 12 now was in jail when I was first born until I was like four. went back when i was 6.So over all just 6 yrs with me out of my whole life. I hardly see him. maybe just like every other week or every 2 weeks. anyway my dad got a dog and now I think I may only be going to see him to play with the dog. Before the dog came I may have only went to get away from my mom or so my family wont get upset that i havent been over his house. My dad is such a....itiot,thug,criminal, man whore, wanna be, jocker, wont pay child support. Do you think I might hate him or sumthin? Am i a bad daughter? tell me pleez.

by the way my mom and step dad hate my father. My mom especially!

Answer 1

He is the bad father. You should be possitive about everything and it will be okay.

Answer 2

Are you a bad daughter? No, not by any means. You unfortunately had a dad that failed you as a parent. You are angry, resentful and you have every right to be. However, hun, you are only 12 and people change over time. If your dad is making an honest attempt to make things right, then maybe he's growing up and taking the steps to do the right thing. If that's the case, it may be worth getting to know him. If it's not and he's still the same, have your mother get you a dog and keep your distance and relationship limited. You are a young impressionable young lady and if he's living the same lifestyle he did that landed him in prison, then it's something you don't need to be around. I know he's your dad and you feel obligated, but keep in mind that anyone can be a father...it takes someone special to be a daddy sweetie.

Answer 3

you are not bad and I'm sorry you've been without your Dad for half of your life. Do you think he might be trying to makeup for the time he wasn't there? At age 12, you are old enough to be able to sit down and have a serious talk with your Dad and find out for yourself if he's really all these things or maybe they are just things you've been told by other people in your family, and just ask him why he doesn't pay child support? say, "Dad, I think if you care about me, you'd help Mom and pay child support". You might be surprised at how your spending time with him might actually turn him around, he might have changed or want to change if he knew you really cared. But if he gets mad or acts like he's done nothing wrong then I think I'd stay away for a while and hope that would make a difference. If he didn't want to see you, he wouldn't spend any time with you.

Answer 4

No, you are not a bad daughter. You have just had alot of hurt. When a dad has not been there, you have no respect there. Some people will never change. Try to understand that. Talk to ur family and tell them that you do not want to go over there and the reasons why. You should not have to put up with a messy situation. I hope this helps.

Answer 5

It doesn't sound as if you're a bad daughter. It sounds as if you haven't been given any reasons to respect him. I don't think it's possible to love someone you don't respect first.
Can you talk it over with your Mom? Is there another relative you respect that you can talk to without having it spread all over the family?
At 12, you shouldn't have to be concerned with these things, however, too many so called adults are self absorbed to the point of making life unnecessarily tough.
Good luck to you. It sounds like you've got good sense.

Answer 6

Feeling ARE NEVER wrong. If your dad's behavior is making you feel this way, it's his fault not yours. I am sorry that you are having a tough time - it IS NOT your fault.
Second, if you don't want to visit with your dad, you don't have to. Tell you mom or a trusted family member that being around your dad just makes you mad/sad/hurt, whatever else.
Unfortuntely, the people who become our parents aren't always the greatest of people - I know from experience. I have sometimes felt like I raised and took care of my parents more than they did for me. The important thing to remember is you don't have to be like them. You are your own person, if anything, try to learn from their mistakes. Good Luck.

Answer 7

hey, some people just screw themselves up. it's not like you have any ties to this man. The fact that you cared enough about this to ask other people, shows that you are caring and caring is not a characteristic of a bad daughter. dislike for someone like that is natural. but don't let dislike and disgust become hatred and anger. just deal with having to go see him.if your mother makes you. discuss your feelings with your parents, they will probably understand.

Answer 8

your not a bad girl thats just how you feel and dont worry cuz im the same age and my dad been in jail since i was born and wont come out tell 2009. those are just your feelings

Answer 9

No. Don't call yourself bad! But if you only go for the dog it might become obvious. And also if he is all those things you might get hurt. If you don't want to go to be with him don't go.

Answer 10

hmm, well the situation is such that it is easy to hate him. However, give him a second chance and talk things out with him. If he still doesnt come around, then just keep quiet and like ignore him.

Answer 11

i hate my dad im visiting him right now and he would rather be at the bar
is yur dad tryin to be there for you does he show you love
cuz mine dont at all he makes it very clear he doesnt want me or my son here
he only comes home to sleep
so is your dad tryin to be there for you cuz if he is id say give him a chance cuz its even worse when you want him in your life but he doesnt want you in his